How to know if my person is still lying
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I recently got the knock for my OH, who was apparently talking to a decoy 14 year old boy on some app. What he did was terrible and i definitely am not taking it lately. However, I feel as though he might be lying to me. For example, from what he tells me, the decoy initated the explicit side of the conversation and kept trying to get him to take part. He also says the decoy repeated asked him to send pictures and sent stuff first to get him to do it. He seems unapologetic, as though he was wronged and taken advantage of.
Im not sure how these decoys operate but so i dont know what to think, but at the same time something about what hes saying feels off.. If what he says is true then maybe i could see some kind of rehabillitation but if hes still lying to me then I dont think this can go on.
What do you all think, lying or no?
Im not sure how these decoys operate but so i dont know what to think, but at the same time something about what hes saying feels off.. If what he says is true then maybe i could see some kind of rehabillitation but if hes still lying to me then I dont think this can go on.
What do you all think, lying or no?
Hi
Firstly I'm sorry you have found yourself here, but you've come to the right place.
As far as I know (and I've had this confirmed by an ex police officer friend) police decoys are not allowed to start the explicit part of the conversation with the offender. They can however respond in an explicit way.
Whether they can ask for explicit photos from the offender I'm not sure but I doubt they are allowed to send them.
Vigilante decoys on the other hand are a law unto themselves and seem to be allowed to do as they please.
If it was a police decoy then I'm afraid it sounds as though your OH could be minimising - it's natural and in no way unusual for them to do this. My OH was adamant he hadn't started the conversation in his case, but forensics told a different story
Xx
Firstly I'm sorry you have found yourself here, but you've come to the right place.
As far as I know (and I've had this confirmed by an ex police officer friend) police decoys are not allowed to start the explicit part of the conversation with the offender. They can however respond in an explicit way.
Whether they can ask for explicit photos from the offender I'm not sure but I doubt they are allowed to send them.
Vigilante decoys on the other hand are a law unto themselves and seem to be allowed to do as they please.
If it was a police decoy then I'm afraid it sounds as though your OH could be minimising - it's natural and in no way unusual for them to do this. My OH was adamant he hadn't started the conversation in his case, but forensics told a different story
Xx
Hi sorry mine was a police decoy incident so i suppose that means that im in a tough situation here.. It makes sense though if he could do everything he did in the past why wouldnt he be able to keep it up..
What platform was the chat on? Did the police decoy try to get the chat moved to a different platform or try to get a meeting arranged?
I'm sorry - basically you have no way of knowing at this stage. You can get your OH to give you full disclosure (no idea if thats the technical term) with the police and with his solicitor, but the police can be very cagey for obvious reasons. But its worth a go. Get your OH to make the requests by email and CC you in - don't be fobbed off. My ex is under investigation for IIOC, so I don't quite know how it works with conversations, but in my case there were no answers till forensics came back.
But you're right to be suspicious. I've been on this site for well over two years and it almost always starts out as the same story.
But you're right to be suspicious. I've been on this site for well over two years and it almost always starts out as the same story.
Hi my oh was a Vigilante decoy I believe my oh was in a over 18s chat group was very drunk and taking high dose of antidepressants which is no excuse what's so ever
I just feel these people turned up on my doorstep about 6 are 7 on my property filming us live on Facebook the language their used the holding is arms etc
These Vigilante decoy and groups should be stopped from live filming I had my window put through cos people found out IAM scared to go out the only time I feel safe and at piece is when iam asleep my anxiety is though the roof we are coming up to sentencing 16 more sleeps IAM so scared of my oh goes to prison and the window smashing starts again if it goes in the news paper are on social media
Sacred and alone xxx
I just feel these people turned up on my doorstep about 6 are 7 on my property filming us live on Facebook the language their used the holding is arms etc
These Vigilante decoy and groups should be stopped from live filming I had my window put through cos people found out IAM scared to go out the only time I feel safe and at piece is when iam asleep my anxiety is though the roof we are coming up to sentencing 16 more sleeps IAM so scared of my oh goes to prison and the window smashing starts again if it goes in the news paper are on social media
Sacred and alone xxx
My person never told me the truth After he was sent to prison I emailed the PF and was given the actual charges
Even after he was released the lies kept coming - not just about the offending but about other stuff
Safe to say he is an ex - and he wouldn't know the truth if it hit him in the face
Even after he was released the lies kept coming - not just about the offending but about other stuff
Safe to say he is an ex - and he wouldn't know the truth if it hit him in the face
Mine denies any wrong doing and went as far as saying the police lied about the searches found on his devices. He got away with nfa but the officer in charge told me it's purely down to lack of evidence as no photos were found but there were several searches for it, seems to think he's all good and doesn't even seem to care about what he's put us through
Mine was fully charged, admitted in court and even showed me forensic evidence, yet still didn't accept that he was responsible.
He claims he never knew they were on his phone.
I was not fully there mentally partly braced of denial and partly because I was having a difficult tume postpartum, so I believed him for so long.
We're still together but I'm trying to fing a way out.
He claims he never knew they were on his phone.
I was not fully there mentally partly braced of denial and partly because I was having a difficult tume postpartum, so I believed him for so long.
We're still together but I'm trying to fing a way out.