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This has probably been posted numerous times, however I am finding the forum overwhelming to read through.
My ex partner, who i was co parenting well with, has been arrested and released on bail for counts of suspicion of cyberflashing and sexual communications with a child. He denies knowing ages and says he was hacked, however its clear he is lying given the information shared by the police.
My eldest (5) is coping the best they can, he hasnt lived in the family home for over a year now so its more the "we cant see him" conversation rather than "hes moved out". He does however have 1 supervised video call a week with them to check in. School have been great and so far aswell as the officer in charge.
I am struggling as mum. Struggling with the guilt of relying on grandparents for childcare and school runs, the worry of whether SS will suggest or put forward for supervised contact, then it taken away again should he be charged/convicted. The worry the answers I give and decisions as mum made now are going to impact the kids as they get older.
I know there is no quick mental fix, but knowing our household is in turmoil whilst he is out at the pubs and continues his daily life with no concern or impact is a real kick when we are down. I am signed off work at the moment to try and decompress, but it has been one thing after another since The Knock in October and I feel no further forward than I did then.
Sorry, im not quite sure what im after, and im not sure what responses ill get back. But hello from what seems like a house surrounded by fire.
My ex partner, who i was co parenting well with, has been arrested and released on bail for counts of suspicion of cyberflashing and sexual communications with a child. He denies knowing ages and says he was hacked, however its clear he is lying given the information shared by the police.
My eldest (5) is coping the best they can, he hasnt lived in the family home for over a year now so its more the "we cant see him" conversation rather than "hes moved out". He does however have 1 supervised video call a week with them to check in. School have been great and so far aswell as the officer in charge.
I am struggling as mum. Struggling with the guilt of relying on grandparents for childcare and school runs, the worry of whether SS will suggest or put forward for supervised contact, then it taken away again should he be charged/convicted. The worry the answers I give and decisions as mum made now are going to impact the kids as they get older.
I know there is no quick mental fix, but knowing our household is in turmoil whilst he is out at the pubs and continues his daily life with no concern or impact is a real kick when we are down. I am signed off work at the moment to try and decompress, but it has been one thing after another since The Knock in October and I feel no further forward than I did then.
Sorry, im not quite sure what im after, and im not sure what responses ill get back. But hello from what seems like a house surrounded by fire.
Greetings, and welcome to this place we all never in a million years thought we would be in.
I hear you. The part about the person going on as if life were normal while ours is blown apart every which way is so tough.
One day the justice system will work better for everyone but we are far from that atm.
Come here often - we are all, or have been, in the same boat, feeling adrift in a tumultuous sea without a compass or an engine.
I hear you. The part about the person going on as if life were normal while ours is blown apart every which way is so tough.
One day the justice system will work better for everyone but we are far from that atm.
Come here often - we are all, or have been, in the same boat, feeling adrift in a tumultuous sea without a compass or an engine.
It's shocking how much the pressure and stress falls to the mums/partners. It's almost like we're being punished instead of them.
Sorry you're part of this horrible club, sending you all the good thoughts.
Sorry you're part of this horrible club, sending you all the good thoughts.
Im sorry you find yourself here. It does get easier the longer down the road.
Usually the SS are much happier when you resteict contact or withhold it completely. He may try to fight for contact with his own children unsupervised in the courts. Which they may or may not grant. But, ultimately you are their legal guardian so you can stop contact. He would most likely have to go through the family courts after to get it if he is allowed unsupervised contact after sentencing for this offence. SS can be an ally for preventing contact or keeping contact to what you currently have if thats what you want going forwards.
Usually the SS are much happier when you resteict contact or withhold it completely. He may try to fight for contact with his own children unsupervised in the courts. Which they may or may not grant. But, ultimately you are their legal guardian so you can stop contact. He would most likely have to go through the family courts after to get it if he is allowed unsupervised contact after sentencing for this offence. SS can be an ally for preventing contact or keeping contact to what you currently have if thats what you want going forwards.