Family and Friends Forum

Could someone please give me some advice? It’sI found out. I now believe my ex to be seriously mentally ill with a compulsion to be self destructive and secretive and seek out the darkest things. I don’t believe there was any contact and he says he has no sexual interest in children. The person I knew and loved was the sweetest kindest most thoughtful man. I’m in a state of horror and shock that all this time I was so close to something so evil.

The revulsion and horror I feel is so strong. I’m trying not to think about the awful things he may have looked at but my brain is trying to make sense of it as I know very little actual details ( I don’t want to know but I believe one day I need to in order to try and understand for my daughters sake)

i feel tormented by the suffering those children must’ve experienced. I’m 6 months pregnant and my maternal instincts are in overdrive. I look at my son and want to cry and not let him out of my sight. How do people cope with this? I have been looking for counsellors in my area, has anyone done this?

Please help, x

Thankyou so much for your support ladies.

I will ring stop it now helpline this eve when my son is in bed. I am also looking at therapists locally. Lost123 did you receive any additional al support from your midwife?

I di not want my daughters father at the birth, this will mean I will be giving birth alone really as I have no family that I want their either. I was so looking forward to eat and was planning for it to be such a wonderful, magical experince( I know right, itd be funny if it wasn’t so tragic) I’m now scared and sad to be doing it without the man I was so in love with. X

This site isn’t the friendliest for mobiles, can’t read back through what I’ve typed until I post! X

Majestictopaz

I will look into the Lucy faithful course, Thankyou.

My ex said he would tell me everything, but I can’t cope with any more right now. Today has been the first time I could face eating more than the smallest mouthful of food without wanting to throw up. I need to eat and sleep for the sake of my baby.

I want to understand but what I know already is almost too horrific for me to cope with

I have been told my ex has daughter psychiatric help and has been referred to crisis centre as he is suicidal. My heart is breaking for him, but then I think of the children in the things he watched and I feel hatred and disgust towards him. Such powerful emotions to have almost at same time aren’t they?

Thankyou so much for sharing your experiences ladies. X

* have been told my ex has sought

bloody mobile.

* have been told my ex has sought

bloody mobile.

Lost123 I have considered a doula, but presumed it would be very expensive . I will look into it though. Thankyou.

HS2-hater He most definitely has PTSD from childhood abuse himself. He is deeply traumatised, I had tried to get him to seek help but he assured me ( and acted at least) like he had got his life on track and was doing well. He said once that I had saved his life, by loving and accepting him. We were going to set up a home, family and future together. I miss him so much it’s so painful. I have trust issues as it is and have suffered PTSD from my own adolescence. It’s like being traumatised all over again.