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Can you ever believe them and will i ever be able to forgive him.

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Mumto3

Member since
November 2025

2 posts

On the 22nd october we had the knock my husband of 21 years is accused of sharing a multiple file containing 15 indecent images 2 cat a children 2 beastiality and 11 indeterminate images he says he was watching porn and things started popping up that were not right so he deleted it and hoped it would go away he said he was aware of some of the files he had shared but not looked at all 15 I want to beleive him im just scared hes not being truthfull I did recieve some paper work through social services that confirms what he has said sort of with it being one incedent on he 13th jan of 15 images im just scared that I could try and deal with this part of it and then when his devices are checked theres more. Im so angry at him for what hes done but I also cant help but miss him I still love him very much as nuts as that sounds we were happy before all this or so i thought are you ever able to forgive I feel so deceived 21 years and hes kept things from me I new he had watched porn when we were younger dvds/magazines but didn't know it was something he still did and im finding it hard to understand how its ended up here i dont feel like I can trust anyone enough to talk about how I feel as im not sure they will understand im also worried about what life would look like if I did decide to try work on my marriage would it even be worth it or would I always be angry at him.

Posted Sun December 21, 2025 4:17pm
Edited Mon December 22, 2025 9:26amReport post

OneStepAtATime

Member since
October 2025

54 posts

Hello, I'm sorry you find yourself here. I have no advice I am afraid as my person is not a partner. I can only try to imagine what it must be like for you. If you haven't already, I'd advise calling the helpline, I found it so helpful to have a space to talk, without judgement. Hopefully others will reply and offer support/advice. You aren't alone x

Posted Mon December 22, 2025 2:24pmReport post

Brkn

Member since
October 2025

16 posts

I'm so sorry you find yourself here, but there are lots of us with similar stories.

this is a shock and it's the beginning - you will start to get more answers hopefully but you also have to let yourself feel all the emotions. It's ok to be angry and disgusted and sad and love them and pity them. It's not something most of us have ever considered a possibility so please be kind to yourself and just take it as you go.

Posted Tue December 23, 2025 12:19amReport post

Mumto3

Member since
November 2025

2 posts

Thankyou for replying to my post means alot it the feels good to just type it out and know people understand how i feel .Theres been a few times ive felt like im loosing my mind.

Posted Tue December 23, 2025 5:28pmReport post

6789

Member since
May 2025

91 posts

We have all felt like that, and you may feel like it again, but over time less so. It is an attack on the whole system, and the mind is at the front of the receiving line! You'll get there, things will get better, and it will take time. Peace to you.

Posted Wed December 24, 2025 10:51amReport post

mum1982H

Member since
September 2022

59 posts

I honestly can't answer that question.

with my experience, my son qas questioned at age 14. related to 1 image, he also knew exactly what date this happened which the police confirmed. He was never arrested or devices taken as they didn't see it as being in the publics interest so I suppose it happens, I can't say that with 100% certainty.

my partner was also arrested, devices taken 1 year ago. they're currently still being processed. he says he 100% has never seen any images at all. The police didn't tell me about what images they suspect him to have viewed and he says they didn't tell him either. They did give brief details saying another investigation involving a woman he was talking sexualy too and sharing porn brought them to suspect him. That degree of unfaithfulness was enough to break my trust. We have an 11 month old daughter so I will always care

I hope you have a lovely Christmas as peaceful as possible. Its the worst time of the year to be dealing with all this. I'm just very grateful my Christmas will be better than last

Posted Wed December 24, 2025 1:26pmReport post

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