Conference
Notifications OFFPost deleted by user
Hi
My Daughter has been on a CPP since August 2024. The SW should give you a report at least two days prior to the conference to list their concerns and why it's gone to conference.
In a nutshell everybody discusses the strengths and concerns and decide whether to put a CPP in place or keep at CIN. All the professionals also have to give a score between 1 and 10. 1 being that your child in completely unsafe and 10 being that your child is safe.
Sorry I can't see your original post now but has he been charged yet? Think it's pretty standard for the police to attend the initial conference to make sure all the professionals are aware of the actual offence. If he hasn't been charged yet I'm not sure if it's classed as confidential and therefore I'm not sure what the police will discuss.
feel free to message me with any questions you have x
My Daughter has been on a CPP since August 2024. The SW should give you a report at least two days prior to the conference to list their concerns and why it's gone to conference.
In a nutshell everybody discusses the strengths and concerns and decide whether to put a CPP in place or keep at CIN. All the professionals also have to give a score between 1 and 10. 1 being that your child in completely unsafe and 10 being that your child is safe.
Sorry I can't see your original post now but has he been charged yet? Think it's pretty standard for the police to attend the initial conference to make sure all the professionals are aware of the actual offence. If he hasn't been charged yet I'm not sure if it's classed as confidential and therefore I'm not sure what the police will discuss.
feel free to message me with any questions you have x
We had CPP conference oo back in October I think. It was a few weeks before his plea hearing. The police just stated what he was charged with and the age ranges of the photos in each category. Each professional seemed happy with what was being done currently but due to the future sexual harm risk due to the unknowns of what may be his sentence in court and they fully believe he is just waiting to rape her in a decades time (yeah that was a horrible conversation to have) we got put on a CPP plan. He needs to do a phyc review to show he is a low risk and is unlikely to rape our daughter....
Everything has stayed the same. I still facilitate the supervision where ever and when ever I see fit. SS check in as usual so far.
Everything has stayed the same. I still facilitate the supervision where ever and when ever I see fit. SS check in as usual so far.
Post deleted by user
My OhH had been charged when we went to conference. The OIC didn't attend but someone from his department did who had a copy of the conversation he got involved in. My OH was seeing a StopSO therapist on a weekly basis for a number of months and the conference chair dismissed the report. She said they don't class it as an independent report as my OH had paid for the therapy and she refused to discuss it during the conference. If anything is happening that you don't agree with speak up and say so- in hindsight SS were being unlawful in my opinion in hiding evidence from professionals xx
Upset mother, your experience makes me feel worried about what ours will be. Terrible that the chair wouldnt consider the specialised therapist's report! Did you put in a complaint?
Got a stage 2 complaint open at the minute that is being overseen by an independent person. This is in relation to how the core groups have been run- receiving core group minutes weeks/months late, Probation being allowed to inflate risk and why our complaint last year (which included the StopSo report being dismissed) was investigated by the corporate route rather then Childrens Act route. This denies you an independent person and a Stage 3 investigation. Our Authority have been extremely bad and dishonest. If the conference chair is not willing share any positive updates- make sure you do and you have the SW report at least two days prior to the conference. x
Post deleted by user
Post deleted by user
For the ICPC- the SW gave me the report in person and for subsequent conferences they have just been sent via email. They do have to give you the report at least 2 days before and if they don't - you can request the conference to be re-scheduled and tell the IRO you are not receiving minutes and reports etc... The IRO is supposed to be independent and should pull the SW up on procedures not being followed.
When is your conference? x
When is your conference? x
Post deleted by user
The IRO is the conference chair. The two terms are interchangeable, some people prefer to say IRO= independent reviewing officer and other people say conference chair. Once a section 47 strategy meeting has happened ( meeting where all the professionals agree that the threshold of significant harm has been met) the conference has to be done within 15 days. The SW should tell you the date and then not long after get their report in time for the conference x
6789,
Hello, I have just been reading your post and wanted to reach out and offer my perspective from dealing with SS. You have said that one of the concerns, likely their biggest concern is that mum isn't acknowledging and being protective enough. This is often there biggest concern, I can see you have listed all the things the dad has done and about the dad learning needs ect but you haven't listed about the mum. I know it seems the dad is the main person of interest as he committed the crime but to ss the mum is the main person, she is the person they judge the most in terms of can this mother see the possible threat we do, is she likely to go behind our backs and leave the children with dad alone etc. My suggestion would be yes that those docs to the conference as they are relevant but then the focus from you and mum needs to be on mum herself and the children. I suggest you challenge what they suggest, so about the no phone calls, explain these are cherished by the children and help their well being during this difficult time and then flatly ask ss exactly what risk of harm the phone calls create to the children, get them to explain their views (THERE IS NO RISK !) - also make sure you are continually referring to the children, say what you think is obvious out loud (say it so it will be noted in the minutes) - 'the children cherish the phone calls with their father, it is on loud speaker and in the same room of X, the boast to my children well being is increased after the calls, yes we all know this phone call is also cherished by the dad and mum but they are important for the children and that is why I push to keep the phone calls, not because the dad wants them but because the children are my priority and they want them so I speak for them' with mum and being protective, what has she done to boast he knowledge around this (sorry I don't know when this started for you all) I did the stop it now support group for family and friends. If was 1hr a week for 6 weeks and you get a certificate at the end to say you've been taigh about risks and how to spot abuse ect. I also completely some free safeguarding courses online. I looked all over the web for things that would A increase my knowledge on abuse and B woukd impress SS. I think the post also pushed to change how he meets the children, I think to make it less regular or different location, again I would flatly challenge this, ask them what risks they are in the current situation and then give them an answer back, you've said you believe they are at risk of being left alone because the mum you believe isn't taking it seriously, there needs to be a greater level of trust, you have seen nothing to suggest the mum has ever or would ever put her children in harms way, she has and is following the plan but she does know he children best and they are happy with this arrangement.
Also if you don't recieve meetings from other meetings etc then send an email of complaint. Bring it up in the meeting in front of the other professionals that you are waiting on minutes, "thankfully mum is fully commited and aware of what is going on so doesn't need it written to refer to it, as some mums would struggle to digest so much information, this mum is completely focused on what exactly she can do to make her children as safe and happy as possible but she is still entitled to the minutes".
Look into everything and anything mum can do to increase her knowledge and awareness around abuse. Try to take a step back from talking about dad, the more that happens they more it will annoy them, they don't care that he has learning difficulties etc they just care about who is in charge of making sure he is safe around the children and that is mum. Id also suggest sitting with mum and doing some practice conversations in prep for the meeting- ask those hard questions and help mum find the wording she wants. Absolutely write notes of the points you all want to get across then at the end of the meeting if you haven't said your peice the notes will be a reminder. I'm not sure on kids ages but if also suggest meeting with school and explain your worries about them changing the contact arrangements. The school ects opinions matter to SS so priorities building a relationship with them.
That's a long message I hope makes sense.
Feel free to message me and best of luck.
X
Hello, I have just been reading your post and wanted to reach out and offer my perspective from dealing with SS. You have said that one of the concerns, likely their biggest concern is that mum isn't acknowledging and being protective enough. This is often there biggest concern, I can see you have listed all the things the dad has done and about the dad learning needs ect but you haven't listed about the mum. I know it seems the dad is the main person of interest as he committed the crime but to ss the mum is the main person, she is the person they judge the most in terms of can this mother see the possible threat we do, is she likely to go behind our backs and leave the children with dad alone etc. My suggestion would be yes that those docs to the conference as they are relevant but then the focus from you and mum needs to be on mum herself and the children. I suggest you challenge what they suggest, so about the no phone calls, explain these are cherished by the children and help their well being during this difficult time and then flatly ask ss exactly what risk of harm the phone calls create to the children, get them to explain their views (THERE IS NO RISK !) - also make sure you are continually referring to the children, say what you think is obvious out loud (say it so it will be noted in the minutes) - 'the children cherish the phone calls with their father, it is on loud speaker and in the same room of X, the boast to my children well being is increased after the calls, yes we all know this phone call is also cherished by the dad and mum but they are important for the children and that is why I push to keep the phone calls, not because the dad wants them but because the children are my priority and they want them so I speak for them' with mum and being protective, what has she done to boast he knowledge around this (sorry I don't know when this started for you all) I did the stop it now support group for family and friends. If was 1hr a week for 6 weeks and you get a certificate at the end to say you've been taigh about risks and how to spot abuse ect. I also completely some free safeguarding courses online. I looked all over the web for things that would A increase my knowledge on abuse and B woukd impress SS. I think the post also pushed to change how he meets the children, I think to make it less regular or different location, again I would flatly challenge this, ask them what risks they are in the current situation and then give them an answer back, you've said you believe they are at risk of being left alone because the mum you believe isn't taking it seriously, there needs to be a greater level of trust, you have seen nothing to suggest the mum has ever or would ever put her children in harms way, she has and is following the plan but she does know he children best and they are happy with this arrangement.
Also if you don't recieve meetings from other meetings etc then send an email of complaint. Bring it up in the meeting in front of the other professionals that you are waiting on minutes, "thankfully mum is fully commited and aware of what is going on so doesn't need it written to refer to it, as some mums would struggle to digest so much information, this mum is completely focused on what exactly she can do to make her children as safe and happy as possible but she is still entitled to the minutes".
Look into everything and anything mum can do to increase her knowledge and awareness around abuse. Try to take a step back from talking about dad, the more that happens they more it will annoy them, they don't care that he has learning difficulties etc they just care about who is in charge of making sure he is safe around the children and that is mum. Id also suggest sitting with mum and doing some practice conversations in prep for the meeting- ask those hard questions and help mum find the wording she wants. Absolutely write notes of the points you all want to get across then at the end of the meeting if you haven't said your peice the notes will be a reminder. I'm not sure on kids ages but if also suggest meeting with school and explain your worries about them changing the contact arrangements. The school ects opinions matter to SS so priorities building a relationship with them.
That's a long message I hope makes sense.
Feel free to message me and best of luck.
X
Thank you for all of that, Sadandworried. I will message you.
We had a CP conference before my person had been charged......and before all evidence had even been returned.
Thankfully all agencies except ss marked us as a 10; the chair then also had to reiterate that they couldn't raise to CP unless there was real risk or evidence we couldn't or my child wasn't safe (which there wasn't-they were projecting what could happen and we'd already covered all scenarios in our family plan).
It's very different and I think our case was more scrutinised because im guessing from reading between the lines and information the ss let slip; that they'd had a case where restrictions and plans weren't good enough and a child had actually come to harm under their watch.
Stay strong and remember all your decisions are based on keeping your child safe and what's best for them, advocating for what they want. Not what is easier for social services who openly told us if I went no contact they'd close the case despite of my child then suffered psychologically or started acting up at school.
Thankfully all agencies except ss marked us as a 10; the chair then also had to reiterate that they couldn't raise to CP unless there was real risk or evidence we couldn't or my child wasn't safe (which there wasn't-they were projecting what could happen and we'd already covered all scenarios in our family plan).
It's very different and I think our case was more scrutinised because im guessing from reading between the lines and information the ss let slip; that they'd had a case where restrictions and plans weren't good enough and a child had actually come to harm under their watch.
Stay strong and remember all your decisions are based on keeping your child safe and what's best for them, advocating for what they want. Not what is easier for social services who openly told us if I went no contact they'd close the case despite of my child then suffered psychologically or started acting up at school.
Thank you holding the grenade. Your post gives me some hope :)
Hi upset mother - please can you give me some back ground to you persons case in terms of obscene publication - it's similar to ours and just want some reassurance. How was your OH caught ? Were they using a particular app or website.
sorry just feeling overwhelmed and over thinking everything.
thanks
sorry just feeling overwhelmed and over thinking everything.
thanks
He was talking to a decoy who asked him to join an App- I think called Wire?! but i'm not sure. The police could then monitor the conversation. I don't know why he stupidly went on it. We still have SS involved 2.5 years later due to the nature of the conversation. Feel free to PM me x