First post
Notifications OFFthe alleged offence is inciting a child to engage in sexual activity. We know exactly who it is, why they've said it and it's malicious. All the police need to do is look at his phone. Thats it. Why is it taking so long?!?
SS were worse then the police - he didn't get to see our kids for over 4 months- he was allowed to see his others. They were doing a risk assessment for the police that the police didn't want and pulled the plug on it on the last day and then approved his nan to supervise contact. We are on a CIN plan.
they also reported me to LADO and as a teacher I've been suspended for months.
all this time everyone's looking at the police who are looking in the other direction. They've not attended any meetings.
just got the message to say there extending again ... AGAIN. another 3 months not being in work, having to have his nan supervise the children for 3 hours a day twice a week. His not allowed to live here. And all the police have to say is that it's not there fault the only bail condition is he needs to be supervised they don't care by who or how long for or where he lives.
honestly I feel like this is the rest of my life. My poor poor kids. They are absolutely distraught. It's the suspense all the time. It's one phone.... WHYYYYY
I’m so sorry you’re living through this. I can sense the despair in your post which is why I wanted to respond even if I can't offer much help. What you’re describing must be so traumatic and also frightening and it’s completely understandable that this has affected you more than your OH.
Sadly, long delays like this are very common in cases involving digital evidence, even when it feels as though it should be straightforward. That doesn’t make it right, and it certainly doesn’t make the impact on your family acceptable.
The restrictions you’ve described—who he can see, under what conditions, and why—would leave anyone feeling powerless and angry. Being placed on a CIN plan and reported to LADO on top of everything else is an enormous weight to carry, particularly when you’re also trying to hold things together for your children.
Please make sure you’re getting support for you. This journey really takes it toll both emotionally and mentally, and you don’t have to carry it alone. Reaching out to others who truly understand, as you’ve done here, matters more than you might realise. If you haven't already done so you might want to consider contacting your GP for help and also the Stop it now helpline.
You’re not failing. You’re surviving something incredibly hard. And even though it feels endless right now, this stage will not last forever.
You’re not alone.