Feel like my world is ending
Notifications OFF
8 weeks. It's been 8 weeks since life as I knew it ended. The worst and longest 8 weeks of my life. Tonight I just feel broken. I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. SS have almost finished their assessment and looking likely to close with a safety plan that means my husband won't live with us for at least a year. My 2.5 year old daughter has gone from a bubbly, well behaved girl to a shell of herself, who lashes out when she doesn't know how to handle her big feelings, my girl who i have the same conversation with every morning "Mammy I sad" "why are you sad baby?" "Daddy not here" "its okay, Mammy's here". She's breaking my heart, her Dad's too when she begs him "Daddy stay" "Daddy come home" "Daddy come with me". Every night is the same, tears and shouts of "want my Daddy back". And yet I keep being told, this won't affect her, she won't remember. I am exhausted. I just want the ground to open up and swallow me.
I'm so sorry, it's just a crap feeling and I'm 100% with you. I've felt so down since Christmas ended and really not hopeful for the future. I'm always hoping I just wake up and this was like a bad dream.
the fallout is so vast and far reaching, just at a point in our lives where I finally felt comfortable. I need some resolution and soon but the courts are so slow
the fallout is so vast and far reaching, just at a point in our lives where I finally felt comfortable. I need some resolution and soon but the courts are so slow
My daughter did change for a little while when my husband was first arrested. We left our family home so it was a big change. We tried our best to keep her life as normal as possible at the start though. Its been just over a year now and she asks for him on a regular basis, but accepts he is at work (the explanation i give her to explain why he isnt here). Shes only 1 so doesnt understand, but she knows he goes away and comes back. She gets very excited when she sees a photo of her daddy and gets very, very upset if a photo of him on my phone disapears. Ive been the one to supervise with the help of family. We legally dont have restrictions now but I dont want social services to freak so we are sticking to supervised visits and him not staying at night. Plan going forward is to slowly transition home once SS is happy because I dont want my daughter to go back to the silent little girl she became. She stopped smiling and stopped giggling. Where now she is such a happy , confident, bossy little toddler.
I hope this gives you some hope for the future. They do bounce back it does take time though
I hope this gives you some hope for the future. They do bounce back it does take time though