Family and Friends Forum

The score is just an indicator on how the professionals feel about the offence tbh.

At my ICPC, I think everyone gave below 5. I think there was even a 2 in there from either the SW or the school nurse. The last two conferences we had- scores have not even been taken. At our review conference three months later- the school and SW gave a 5, the school nurse and probation officer gave 6 but the CPP remained in place.

They are just basically saying how safe they think your child is. Its only something that is done at the end of the conference before its wrapped up. Make sure you get all reports at least two days before the conference x

We got 6s and 7 from police, nursery. Social worker and health visitor. All but social worker struggled to give a score. And there was a lot of discussion whether it should be an 8 or 9.... still got put on a CPP.



I got the reports 2 days before hand. Im dyslexic and I must have read it 8 times and I didnt say much what I wanted to at the CPP conference because I just panicked and cried the entire time

The whole process is wishy washy. Its all subjective and opinion based- it isnt riight. You have people making important decisions about your life when you know perfectly well your child is safe and doing well x

People give their numbers - we've had 2 different CP conferences in different LA's and in one we were invited to give ours but told it wouldn't be counted (so what was the point?!) but not in this one relating to our son. It's the Independent Reviewing Officer (Chairperson) who ultimatelty decides on the outcome having listened to what everyone says. Also make sure you understand which way the scores go ie is 10 the most serious or is 10 the best score - at one of ours someone asked to rescore as they'd 'done it the wrong way round.'

Yes it is the IRO who makes the decision, they work for the safeguarding team in the LA and tend to me more risk adverse. Even though my OH probation officer has always supported the case moving down to CIN the IRO overrides the decision and keeps the CPP in place. My last conference in October, the SW recommended case closure, the IRO overrode this. It's a messed up system x

It wasnt a nice experience, im defined going to need therapy thanks to all of this.

Im hopeful that the next one may be better. The next conference should include VISOR and probation from my understanding. So they may be able to help bring a better understanding to others or not. I try to hold onto hope. I know CPPs are hard to get off of though

Oh they know. Ive been very open and honest, I was under the perinatal mental health team when he was arrested. I basically wasted my therapy with them discussing how I couldnt cope with SS pressuring me to do the polices job instead of focusing on what we should have been doing which was why I felt I hadn't bonded with my daughter. I had told SS I had a traumatic birth and I was struggling mentally due to it. Didn't stop them discussing horrific topics outside what he was accused of (at the time that was distribution for some reason they hadnt added pocession at the start despite it being known images so of course he would have had to posess then to then disreibute them) in the first week and repeatedly doing this week on week and ringing me at work to discuss it further leaving me in tears at work. Because I didnt expect to have to find way to discuss disceestly whether or not he may have raped my daughter with my colleagues in the next room (not something i ever wish to repeat) and I always feel the need to answer them when I should have in hine sight said now is not an appropriate time but I wasnt in a good place mentally to think straight at all.



Im sure my GP knows some stuff as everything was sent to them. I refuse to take any medication while im breastfeeding. Im a very stuborn resilient person.

I get why people really heavily stigmatise SO. But until my husband offended I had zero clue how many SO offend due to porn addiction.

Before my husband offened the image of SO in my head was like the high profile cases like Jeffery Epstine, Gary Glitter, Jimmy Saville and all of those cases. Its been a fast learning curb. Ive learned a lot. I know ive shot myself in the foot and few times trying to protect myself so I can protect my daughter. So I have a might higher mountain to climb with SS. But ultimately I dont believe my husband would ever harm our daughter. And he knows if he ever did anything ever again that he would loose everything. Family, friends and his access to his daughter. He has been very fortunate that everyone we have told stands by him. He has over 20 people to go to who will help as long as he doesnt offend. Thats a large network to loose. And I think that accountability is helping him really. Along with the fact we do talk a lot which we weren't doing before. Im hopeful SS see this and stop putting new milestones to meet before theyre happy