Family and Friends Forum

Hi there, I can definitely relate to all of that, the feelings are so conflicting. I am trying to remember who he is, despite the awful offence, and trying to trust both him and my own judgement that he is a good person. I'm afraid I'm going through the same thing so I don't have any advice but I hope it helps to know you're not alone. Here if you wanted to message me x

Sorry you are struggling so much. Goes with the territory i think :(. Have you called the helpline for a chat about how you are feeling? Might be helpful?

Go well.

I can so relate. As much as I love my Son (the world over) I too have conflicting feelings, like yourself - of shame, disgust and resentment of why on earth he would put us through what has been the worst time of our lives by far.

im going to put my neck on the line here, but il go as far to say that it's a baggage that I will carry for the rest of my life and an invisible wedge that will no doubt always be there lurking in even years to come. Some days il be honest I've felt like walking away from him, and as a mother I'm ashamed to say that. A nightmare beyond anything ever. Sending love to you all x

I'd say it's normal some days I could scream WHY at him for what he's done and some days I cry for him as he looks helpless

I guess time is a great healer so just take it one day at a time is my advice

Get outside for a walk and just breathe there are 100s of us going through this together

just reach out to us as we are all in this horrible situation x

Hi, I don't think any of us can say what is a normal reaction, We're a few weeks since the 'knock' and somehow it wasn't the first thing I thought about when I woke up yesterday. Then I felt guilty for not thinking about it. Then I felt angry at me, him, the police, the world and wanted to not get out of bed. The scale of this problem is so huge, its never really talked about in the press and the amount of young people getting into lifechanging trouble needs to be known. however because of the shame of it, we can't talk about it openly to anyone. Keep strong and post/message on here when you need to, its so sad but it helps to know your're not alone.

I'm v close to my ex mother in law She says she loves her son but doesn't understand why and what he did He has offered no explanation or apology

So how does he repay her? By getting himself arrested again as he cannot stop lying.

What would I do in her shoes? I really don't know.

I managed to get him out of my life but she doesn't have that option