Feeling lost - DBS/LADO
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I would appreciate any kind words of wisdom right now. Long story, please bear with me.
Had the knock in 2021, convicted in 2025 of IIOC. 2-year suspended sentence, 10 years SOR and SHPO. I work with children and at the time we agreed if this would cause any issues with my career, we would end the relationship and he would move out - this was also communicated to his OM and PO.
I spoke with the OM about my job. I have work documents on my laptop which include images and social media access. I confirmed my partner has no access to my devices, everything is password protected, and he has never attended my place of work. That OM did not feel disclosure was required at that time.
Mid 2025 we were both going through a pretty tough time mentally, resulting in a rough patch in our relationship.
After a device inspection, police arrested him on coercive and controlling behavior. I did not make any statements and disagreed with this claim. This ended with No Further Action and was a one-off incident with no further concerns.
We moved to a new area at the end of 2025 which meant a new OM. This new OM decided disclosure was now necessary. I informed her I would end the relationship and he would move out—I had told the previous OM this too. The new OM originally agreed and both she and the Sergeant confirmed no disclosure would take place if we separated.
Things got messy. I was called into a work meeting and suspended because my employer claims the OM contacted them saying I was living with an RSO and they were worried the employer didn't know. For 10 days after, the OM was still claiming to me that she hadn't disclosed anything.
Today I had a disciplinary meeting. My employer had had a LADO meeting and told me it was unanimously decided I pose a safeguarding risk due to dishonesty and withheld information.They presented me with a risk assessment and said this brings into question my moral judgment and decision making. They also claim the OM told them that I told her I had already disclosed to work, which is simply not true. It's s been pretty awful to listen to everything they had to say.
I was already devistated at the potential of losing my job, but now they're making a referral to the Barring Service. They say I'm not the kind of person who should be working with children.
Has anyone ever experienced a referral to barring service and can say what to expect? Or just any advice right now would be much appreciated
Had the knock in 2021, convicted in 2025 of IIOC. 2-year suspended sentence, 10 years SOR and SHPO. I work with children and at the time we agreed if this would cause any issues with my career, we would end the relationship and he would move out - this was also communicated to his OM and PO.
I spoke with the OM about my job. I have work documents on my laptop which include images and social media access. I confirmed my partner has no access to my devices, everything is password protected, and he has never attended my place of work. That OM did not feel disclosure was required at that time.
Mid 2025 we were both going through a pretty tough time mentally, resulting in a rough patch in our relationship.
After a device inspection, police arrested him on coercive and controlling behavior. I did not make any statements and disagreed with this claim. This ended with No Further Action and was a one-off incident with no further concerns.
We moved to a new area at the end of 2025 which meant a new OM. This new OM decided disclosure was now necessary. I informed her I would end the relationship and he would move out—I had told the previous OM this too. The new OM originally agreed and both she and the Sergeant confirmed no disclosure would take place if we separated.
Things got messy. I was called into a work meeting and suspended because my employer claims the OM contacted them saying I was living with an RSO and they were worried the employer didn't know. For 10 days after, the OM was still claiming to me that she hadn't disclosed anything.
Today I had a disciplinary meeting. My employer had had a LADO meeting and told me it was unanimously decided I pose a safeguarding risk due to dishonesty and withheld information.They presented me with a risk assessment and said this brings into question my moral judgment and decision making. They also claim the OM told them that I told her I had already disclosed to work, which is simply not true. It's s been pretty awful to listen to everything they had to say.
I was already devistated at the potential of losing my job, but now they're making a referral to the Barring Service. They say I'm not the kind of person who should be working with children.
Has anyone ever experienced a referral to barring service and can say what to expect? Or just any advice right now would be much appreciated
A lot will depend on what your employment contract says about disclosing things.
Read the contract first and then contact the ACAS helpline for some advice on how to proceed.
0300 123 1100
Read the contract first and then contact the ACAS helpline for some advice on how to proceed.
0300 123 1100
In sorry youre going through this.
Have you spoken to someone on the helpline? They may have some helpful advise. Where to look and give you information that might be useful to you on this and what you can do next.
Have you spoken to someone on the helpline? They may have some helpful advise. Where to look and give you information that might be useful to you on this and what you can do next.
As edel2020 said it depends on your contract. Do you belong to a union?
They may have legal advice that can be used in cases like this. Failing that the citizens advice bureau maybe able to help with the employment law.
I am so sorry you are going through this.
They may have legal advice that can be used in cases like this. Failing that the citizens advice bureau maybe able to help with the employment law.
I am so sorry you are going through this.
