First post in a while...
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Hi all,
Hope you're all doing as well as can be. I've not posted on here in a while, but I do pop on now and again to see how everyone is getting on in this horrible situation we find ourselves in.
I have been really struggling with my mental health since all of this happened to our family, over 2 years ago now! My ex and I separated 9 years ago, he still saw our children regularly up until the knock in November 2017. That's when our world fell apart and we found out he was under investigation for downloading IIOC. I immediately stopped contact between him and our children, based on the advice of the police and social worker.
In November 2018, he was charged with downloading and sharing IIOC, as well as having horrific images of people and animals, then also possessing a paedophile manual. He was given an 18 month sentence in January 2019 but was released in August, serving just over half of his sentence.
Since then, I have been trying to sell the house that we jointly own (and I still live in with our children). The police advised me that he was being released back to his mothers address, this is where I sent a letter and copies of estate agent valuations in the hope that he would sign and I could put the house up for sale! But no.. his mother posted them back to me and said he doesn't live there and if I send anything else then she would get me 'done' for harassment! Funny thing is, he has been seen going in and out of this house and in the car with her!
I then decided to apply for a court order to seek permission to sell the house. I had to submit various statements, chronologies and send all evidence I had to show that I had been paying the mortgage for the last 9 years.
It was the first court hearing yesterday, he failed to attend and did not submit the requested information to the court. The judge basically dismissed me and said they would have to 'look' for him in an official way, via the DWP etc and serve papers on him. So basically, he has slipped off the radar.
1. If he is still on licence (as he was release before the end of his sentence) would he not be breaching anything as he failed to attend a court hearing?
2. Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Where they are trying to sell a property/assets?
I have emailed both the court and my local MP, to complain about what we have been through. Yesterday, the judge didn't even know what my case was about, despite me submitting reams of paperwork, he didn't have a clue why I was there or what hoped to gain! I was representing myself as I am not eligible for legal aid and cannot afford a solicitor (single parent to 2 children, working part time and trying to pay for and maintain a comfortable home enviroment!)
I'm just so frustrated at the lack of support. I have been signed off work for 2 weeks as my head is just a mess, and it is all down to this one person for putting our life on hold after flipping it on it's head! He has not once contacted me to ask how the children are or anything. Luckily, they have dealt with all this amazingly (much better than me)!
Sorry for the rant, I just needed to get it out of my system!!
Hope you're all doing as well as can be. I've not posted on here in a while, but I do pop on now and again to see how everyone is getting on in this horrible situation we find ourselves in.
I have been really struggling with my mental health since all of this happened to our family, over 2 years ago now! My ex and I separated 9 years ago, he still saw our children regularly up until the knock in November 2017. That's when our world fell apart and we found out he was under investigation for downloading IIOC. I immediately stopped contact between him and our children, based on the advice of the police and social worker.
In November 2018, he was charged with downloading and sharing IIOC, as well as having horrific images of people and animals, then also possessing a paedophile manual. He was given an 18 month sentence in January 2019 but was released in August, serving just over half of his sentence.
Since then, I have been trying to sell the house that we jointly own (and I still live in with our children). The police advised me that he was being released back to his mothers address, this is where I sent a letter and copies of estate agent valuations in the hope that he would sign and I could put the house up for sale! But no.. his mother posted them back to me and said he doesn't live there and if I send anything else then she would get me 'done' for harassment! Funny thing is, he has been seen going in and out of this house and in the car with her!
I then decided to apply for a court order to seek permission to sell the house. I had to submit various statements, chronologies and send all evidence I had to show that I had been paying the mortgage for the last 9 years.
It was the first court hearing yesterday, he failed to attend and did not submit the requested information to the court. The judge basically dismissed me and said they would have to 'look' for him in an official way, via the DWP etc and serve papers on him. So basically, he has slipped off the radar.
1. If he is still on licence (as he was release before the end of his sentence) would he not be breaching anything as he failed to attend a court hearing?
2. Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Where they are trying to sell a property/assets?
I have emailed both the court and my local MP, to complain about what we have been through. Yesterday, the judge didn't even know what my case was about, despite me submitting reams of paperwork, he didn't have a clue why I was there or what hoped to gain! I was representing myself as I am not eligible for legal aid and cannot afford a solicitor (single parent to 2 children, working part time and trying to pay for and maintain a comfortable home enviroment!)
I'm just so frustrated at the lack of support. I have been signed off work for 2 weeks as my head is just a mess, and it is all down to this one person for putting our life on hold after flipping it on it's head! He has not once contacted me to ask how the children are or anything. Luckily, they have dealt with all this amazingly (much better than me)!
Sorry for the rant, I just needed to get it out of my system!!
Sorry that you are having this nightmare to deal with. He would be on the SOR and therefore the police should know where he is. I doubt that if you asked them they would tell you, what with data protection and all that. But maybe if you went to your local station and asked to talk to someone in the team that manages sex offenders you might be able to get a message to him via them. It's a long shot but might work. Otherwise try citizens advice and ask them how you can go about tracking him down.