4 years to charge court next week
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Hi I'm a mother struggling to cope with this process how do you keep it all inside when your son can't doesn't talk about it and is struggling himself? He was arrested 4 years ago and only charged in the last few weeks he's on a SRO before charge runs out this year.
Court is next week we haven't spoken about what's going to happen on that day and I don't know what he's going to plead or whether he's spoken to his solicitor about it yet. It'd driving me crazy with the worry . How do other mums cope if this comes into their lives please any advice ? I've tried being strong but I feel like I'm crumbling now. I'm 71 and don't usually do the age thing but I'm feeling a bit weak minded over this upcoming week
Court is next week we haven't spoken about what's going to happen on that day and I don't know what he's going to plead or whether he's spoken to his solicitor about it yet. It'd driving me crazy with the worry . How do other mums cope if this comes into their lives please any advice ? I've tried being strong but I feel like I'm crumbling now. I'm 71 and don't usually do the age thing but I'm feeling a bit weak minded over this upcoming week
Hi, I can't offer you much in the way of advice but wanted you to know you're not alone. I'm in a similar situation albeit not as far down the line and I'm truly heartbroken and don't know how I'm coping. In fact I'm probably in denial right now and once things move on I will crumble also. I have gained a lot from this forum but feel free to dm me if you want to chat in private
It is so tough, esp if he is not communicating with you, and you having to shoulder this as an older person has added challenges too. I do hope Court goes ok. The helpline 08081000900 will be a good number to ring and talk it through.
Hi Flow, 4 years is an awfully long time to have been dealing with so much anxiety and trauma and I’m so sorry you’re going through this. There isn’t much anyone can say to take away the pain, but from one mum to another I can share that for me, it was only once we’d been through sentencing and finally knew what we were dealing with that my pain gradually started to become more manageable.
It’s possible your son doesn’t yet know how he’ll plead, and also quite likely he hasn’t spoken with a solicitor. Many people don’t actually meet their solicitor until the day of their court appearance. It’s also not unusual for a solicitor to receive the paperwork for the charges on the same day as the plea hearing.
If that happens, the solicitor will usually go through the plea options with him about 30 minutes before the hearing. The plea hearing itself is often very short and held in magistrates court, where a decision is usually made to send the case to crown court. If your son does plead guilty, he’ll be given a crown court date and told to attend the police station within three days to be placed on the SOR.
Please know that you're not alone in this, there are many mums on here who truly understand what you’re facing so keep reaching out to us and we'll do what we can to support you through the next days and weeks.
It’s possible your son doesn’t yet know how he’ll plead, and also quite likely he hasn’t spoken with a solicitor. Many people don’t actually meet their solicitor until the day of their court appearance. It’s also not unusual for a solicitor to receive the paperwork for the charges on the same day as the plea hearing.
If that happens, the solicitor will usually go through the plea options with him about 30 minutes before the hearing. The plea hearing itself is often very short and held in magistrates court, where a decision is usually made to send the case to crown court. If your son does plead guilty, he’ll be given a crown court date and told to attend the police station within three days to be placed on the SOR.
Please know that you're not alone in this, there are many mums on here who truly understand what you’re facing so keep reaching out to us and we'll do what we can to support you through the next days and weeks.
He will be given time before the court hearing to talk to his solicitor. They will advise him on what to do plea wise. If be pleasure guilty then it will just be 1 more court date usually 4 weeks later and thats when he will be officially charged. If he pleas innocent the process can be a lot longer but court is usually still usually1 month after plea hearing still. Courts are really pushing these through now.
Hopefully he opens up more after the hearing because youll know everything especially if you turn up.
Hopefully he opens up more after the hearing because youll know everything especially if you turn up.
'My' case was a husband rather than a son, but I really struggle to have patience with the 'won't talk about it' thing. Its incredibly unfair to the families, who are completely innocent and suffer so much. If he is seeking any kind of support from you - practical, emotional, financial - I would start insisting on a few things in return. I didn't much want to talk about it either as a spouse, but I had to, repeatedly, to SS, my childrens' schools, various family members etc. No one gave me a choice!
