The THIRD knock
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My brother was convicted in 2020 and was sentenced to 6 years, served 3 and was let out on probabtion for the other 3 years. This November would be when his probation would end.
Last November he had a second knock, he swore blind that he had no idea why as the police were monitoring him with probation and an app on his phone. They took his devices but nothing has come of it yet - no charge and devices haven't even been looked at yet.
This morning he had his third knock. This time police did reveal that they had traced a SECOND PHONE to him that he'd been using. They arrested him, took his devices and he's now in custody, awaiting court tomorrow and apparently will have to serve 2/3 of the rest of his sentence and then be released to await the outcome of the last 2 knocks. Before he left he said "I'm sorry I can't help it".
He lives with my Mum who is understandably heartbroken. But she will just not wash her hands of him no matter what. When this happens, she rallies around him to make sure he has everything he needs. Now she's in a hard place as he contributed to the household bills. He has no clue what he's doing is wrong and doesn't care who his actions affect. He has no remorse and is ungrateful at how we have already supported him. I can't help but feel torn. I promised myself I wouldn't support him again but the other half of me feels sad for him that he's in this position again.
What irks me is that there's nothing in place in his SHPO terms saying that he MUST engage with charities such as this one or others to rehabilitate himself. I feel as though it's all about monitoring offenders and not actually rehabilitating them.
Does anyone know of any charities or organisations that could help my mum with household bills or just general support to help her not be at his beck and call as much? She really loves to mother him and they're not good for one another. He needs to stand on his own two feet so when this happens again it won't affect her as much.
Thank you for reading!
Last November he had a second knock, he swore blind that he had no idea why as the police were monitoring him with probation and an app on his phone. They took his devices but nothing has come of it yet - no charge and devices haven't even been looked at yet.
This morning he had his third knock. This time police did reveal that they had traced a SECOND PHONE to him that he'd been using. They arrested him, took his devices and he's now in custody, awaiting court tomorrow and apparently will have to serve 2/3 of the rest of his sentence and then be released to await the outcome of the last 2 knocks. Before he left he said "I'm sorry I can't help it".
He lives with my Mum who is understandably heartbroken. But she will just not wash her hands of him no matter what. When this happens, she rallies around him to make sure he has everything he needs. Now she's in a hard place as he contributed to the household bills. He has no clue what he's doing is wrong and doesn't care who his actions affect. He has no remorse and is ungrateful at how we have already supported him. I can't help but feel torn. I promised myself I wouldn't support him again but the other half of me feels sad for him that he's in this position again.
What irks me is that there's nothing in place in his SHPO terms saying that he MUST engage with charities such as this one or others to rehabilitate himself. I feel as though it's all about monitoring offenders and not actually rehabilitating them.
Does anyone know of any charities or organisations that could help my mum with household bills or just general support to help her not be at his beck and call as much? She really loves to mother him and they're not good for one another. He needs to stand on his own two feet so when this happens again it won't affect her as much.
Thank you for reading!
I am so sorry that you are all going through this another time.
The citizens advice bureau online is very helpful and your mum could look up Turn2us. Its an online calculator that can give you an idea of any financial support that your mum maybe entitled to. If she prefers you can go into a CAB and they will help your mum. They will even help her fill out any necessary forms.
Hope this helps. Xx
The citizens advice bureau online is very helpful and your mum could look up Turn2us. Its an online calculator that can give you an idea of any financial support that your mum maybe entitled to. If she prefers you can go into a CAB and they will help your mum. They will even help her fill out any necessary forms.
Hope this helps. Xx
Thank you, I really appreciate that!
As a sister of the knock.. Or for me the phonecall from the police saying he had been arrested. I just wanted to reach out. Im only on day 14... 14 days of hell. I am struggling big time. and just like my family. Their actions are our consequences and it makes me so angry.
It's hard to wrap your head around isn't it? To have it happen a third time as well is just mind blowing. It doesn't help that it takes so long for the police to do anything and sentencing is often years away :(
I second citizens advise, theyll know what she will and wont be entitled to and where to go for support.
StopSo may be able to help her with counceling for herself (and for him when he comes out) but its not free.
Just try to support you mum as best you can while keeping your distance from him if that is what you wish to do.
Your right the system does need to improve, probabtion do a lot of work to try and help, but i do think it needs to be reviewed because even for other crimes you have people in and out of the system because they just commit a crime again and again.
StopSo may be able to help her with counceling for herself (and for him when he comes out) but its not free.
Just try to support you mum as best you can while keeping your distance from him if that is what you wish to do.
Your right the system does need to improve, probabtion do a lot of work to try and help, but i do think it needs to be reviewed because even for other crimes you have people in and out of the system because they just commit a crime again and again.
