Healing is slow but possible.
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This is for all you women whose life changed over night. I don't know you but I think about you every day.
I don't want to go into detail about my situation but I made him leave, we have children. We are now divorced & he's in prison.
I've realised that healing isn't about forgetting. It's about slowly getting your life back.
For a long time, my world revolved around police, courts, fear, anger and trying to make sense of something that never will make sense. I thought I'd always feel trapped in those thoughts.
I'm not completely there yet, but I'm beginning to see glimpses of the person I used to be. I've started building a new life, a new identity for me & my children, and a future that isn't defined by someone else's choices.
Some days are still hard. Some days I still replay everything in my head. But I'm learning that moving on doesn't mean what happened was okay. It means refusing to let it control the rest of my life.
If you're at the beginning of this journey, please don't lose hope. There were times I genuinely believed I'd never smile properly again. I was wrong.
To anyone who feels broken right now: keep going. Healing is painfully slow, but it is possible. One day you'll realise you're thinking more about your future than your past, and that's the day you'll know you've started to reclaim your life.
We didn't choose what happened to us, but we can choose what happens next.
You're stronger than you know!
I don't want to go into detail about my situation but I made him leave, we have children. We are now divorced & he's in prison.
I've realised that healing isn't about forgetting. It's about slowly getting your life back.
For a long time, my world revolved around police, courts, fear, anger and trying to make sense of something that never will make sense. I thought I'd always feel trapped in those thoughts.
I'm not completely there yet, but I'm beginning to see glimpses of the person I used to be. I've started building a new life, a new identity for me & my children, and a future that isn't defined by someone else's choices.
Some days are still hard. Some days I still replay everything in my head. But I'm learning that moving on doesn't mean what happened was okay. It means refusing to let it control the rest of my life.
If you're at the beginning of this journey, please don't lose hope. There were times I genuinely believed I'd never smile properly again. I was wrong.
To anyone who feels broken right now: keep going. Healing is painfully slow, but it is possible. One day you'll realise you're thinking more about your future than your past, and that's the day you'll know you've started to reclaim your life.
We didn't choose what happened to us, but we can choose what happens next.
You're stronger than you know!
This is such a reassuring post to read. I stayed as I believed my OH and 18months after the knock he received NFA which was the biggest relief to us both. So why don't I feel better, why can't I put those 18months of trauma behind me?
We talk all the time way more than before and he did admit to a porn addiction and has done and is still doing loads of work around that for which I'm so proud of him and I said to him that I still think about the knock and following months every day, not all day every day but not a day goes past I don't remember.
I don't know what I'm getting at other than waffling but just coming on here occasionally now and looking for any glimmers of hope that it can become a distant memory one day.
thanks again
We talk all the time way more than before and he did admit to a porn addiction and has done and is still doing loads of work around that for which I'm so proud of him and I said to him that I still think about the knock and following months every day, not all day every day but not a day goes past I don't remember.
I don't know what I'm getting at other than waffling but just coming on here occasionally now and looking for any glimmers of hope that it can become a distant memory one day.
thanks again
Emma - I think about this a lot, we're still in the process (my son) and NFA not likely but I ha e wondered how I would feel, and whilst of course it would be such a relief the trauma of the past year would still be there and in a way regardless of outcome/ sentence, life won't ever be quite the same again. We've all lost an innocence we had before this, the uncertainty and unknowns of the process are brutal, and the stigma is so isolating, I think even with NFA we would all wish for life before this awful journey. Am sure time is a healer though and hopefully others will be able to share glimmers of positivity further down the line.
