Welcome. I feel for you. Well done you and your son for reaching out so quickly for support.

The shock and horror will lessen but it will take time.

Samaritans is a great resource too, for any of you.

Warm thoughts to you all...

Sorry you find yourselves in this position too. Can totally relate, we are 9 months in with our 18yo son and waiting on a CPS decision. It's absolute hell and the repercussions are endless, but that initial shock and pain does ease and you find your way back to a new normal, just punctuated by the process and with the dread of the unknown. It really is just one day at a time and be kind to yourself, so many unknowns and things out of our control, but I tell myself I don't have to have all the answers now, it's a process on many levels.

I found researching it helpful, will share some links. I think the risks online for young people are only just beginning to be understood, and this is a generation of boys affected by a combination of dangerous factors (covid, social media, isolation) and for some (us included) layered with the challenges of neurodivergence, bullying and online grooming. Sadly they go through the adult system and will bear the brunt of a brutal approach not designed for their age or circumstances and be criminalised for it with lifelong impacts. Let down by a very naive generation of adults before them who didnt fully understand the dangers themselves. But as sad as that is it's helped me understand what has led us (and many others) here and can then help my son to repair and rebuild.

The only other thing that's helped is finding a solicitor, although not cheap and appreciate not possible for everyone. And this forum and the helpline have been brilliant. You're not alone. Feel free to message anytime, we are walking the same path and your son will need your love and support so make sure you look after yourself too if you can x

Links as promised:

Ofcom report on perpetrators (includes risk factors for young people):
https://www.ofcom.org.uk/siteassets/resources/documents/online-safety/research-statistics-and-data/protecting-children/csam-perpetrator-research-report.pdf?v=413698

https://www.theguardian.com/global-development/2023/dec/04/thousands-young-people-caught-watching-online-child-abuse-images-scary-figures-show-england-wales

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2025/aug/18/children-exposure-to-porn-online-safety-act-commissioner

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2025/apr/05/i-didnt-start-out-wanting-to-see-kids-are-porn-algorithms-feeding-a-generation-of-paedophiles-or-creating-one

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2025/dec/11/online-child-sexual-abuse-surges-by-26-percent-in-year-as-police-say-tech-firms-must-

Sorry you find yourself here. This was me last year.

It is going to be a rollercoaster of emotions over the coming months. Take one day at a time and try not to think too far ahead. It's certainly not a quick process and took us nearly a year to get a NFA result but the trauma from the experience will take a while to recover from.

It's great you have already been able to speak to the helpline I found them very supportive and non judgemental.

Please keep an eye on your son's mental health and get him support if things get too much for him.

Has he been able to speak to you much about it yet?. You may find out that the situation is more complex into how he ended up in this situation.

Inbox is always open if you need to offload.

Take care.

Honestly know exactly how you feel. Somehow you find strength you didn't know you had. The initial shock is traumatic and overwhelming. It does ease but if you need some support the helpline is great. I found breathwork helped with the anxiety. Take lots of care x

Sorry you find yourself here. Has he spoken much yet about the why? It may help you help him. My husband was open and honest, I think because he was its helped him. And helped all of us try to help him. And support helps prevent reoffending.

I highly recommend doing the inform course for yourself and the inform plus for him.