So alone
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I am 3 months post knock. This is my first time posting. All devices have been seized. My partner admitted everything to the police. He had iioc on his computer Last week he was issued with a shpo. So no contact with anyone under 18. I have a niece and nephew so spoke to my family about it as there was a risk of contact though it was very small. They have all stopped contact with me now as they are not happy that he is still living at my house. I have never felt so alone. Does it ever end.
Thanks you for the support. I am sorry you are in the same situation as me. I have so many emotions going through me right now. Some days I just can't cope. I will ring the help line, I am so afraid of the future.
Hi Unsure
I am so sorry you've joined us here. I'm a long way along, husband due to be sentenced soon. If I could go back and advise myself, it would be to breathe, nothing will happen quickly. Try hard to take care of your health and basic needs. Sleep, eat. Visit your GP if this is problematic, mine was so sympathetic.
Ring the helpline and find support here.
Take care x
I am so sorry you've joined us here. I'm a long way along, husband due to be sentenced soon. If I could go back and advise myself, it would be to breathe, nothing will happen quickly. Try hard to take care of your health and basic needs. Sleep, eat. Visit your GP if this is problematic, mine was so sympathetic.
Ring the helpline and find support here.
Take care x
Thanks for your reply. Every day is a struggle. I am trying to eat but am struggling. Some nights I can't sleep. Then I am worrying about my job. I don't know if I have to tell them. It is a horrible situation. My partner has been very honest about everything but he is feeling guilt for what he has done to me. It is just awful.
Do not tell work,despite the fact that you have done nothing wrong,the morons will label you.Stay strong.
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Hi Andrea. I don't really have a relationship with anyone at work based on the fact I am a lone worker out in the community. I work with vulnerable adults and sometimes children. So I might have to tell them. The police said that it wasn't me being investigated so it wouldn't affect work. But after reading posts on here i am not so sure. I don't know if it will affect my dbs check as at the moment he still lives with me. For how long for I don't no. It all depends on if I find he has lied to me about anything when thing get further down the line. I don't want to walk away from him as I believe he needs help for an addiction. But I will if I haven't had the truth. Life is such a mess. X
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I think I will talk to them. And see what happens. I am struggling every day and possibly going to need some time off. Thanks for your help. X
I have a very close male friend who has been caught up in this "industry".He is so traumatised by it,I am researching to determine how to help him.
I knew nothing about all this beforehand,but my eyes have been opened to how awful it is for everyone concerned,including the innocents who are caught up in it.i.e the wies and children.
I knew nothing about all this beforehand,but my eyes have been opened to how awful it is for everyone concerned,including the innocents who are caught up in it.i.e the wies and children.
Unsure - we had the knock at about the same time it would seem. My partner has pled guilty to viewing iioc - although he always deleted them after looking at google and bing images (which is where he found them) as he knew what he was doing was wrong and wanted to stop.
About your family - have you given them any information to help them understand why your partner did what he did? All of our respective families are aware and I pointed them towards a synopsis of the key concepts on why internet porn addiction is such a huge epidemic -and fast growing problem to help them try and understand (see link below). It helped that they all know and love my partner - this problem was fairly recent and he has spent a LIFETIME endeavouring to be a good man in every other respect prior to that. They also know he wouldn't harm a flea (let alone a child - in real life - and he realises NOW that even viewing abuse is perpetuating the abuse). It's just very VERY unfortunate that his slide into illegal activity has such HUGE implications for us all. So I guess I'm just fortunate that all of our family have been very supportive and have sought to understand more about his problem.
https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/miscellaneous-resources/start-here-evolution-has-not-prepared-your-brain-for-todays-porn/
About your family - have you given them any information to help them understand why your partner did what he did? All of our respective families are aware and I pointed them towards a synopsis of the key concepts on why internet porn addiction is such a huge epidemic -and fast growing problem to help them try and understand (see link below). It helped that they all know and love my partner - this problem was fairly recent and he has spent a LIFETIME endeavouring to be a good man in every other respect prior to that. They also know he wouldn't harm a flea (let alone a child - in real life - and he realises NOW that even viewing abuse is perpetuating the abuse). It's just very VERY unfortunate that his slide into illegal activity has such HUGE implications for us all. So I guess I'm just fortunate that all of our family have been very supportive and have sought to understand more about his problem.
https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/miscellaneous-resources/start-here-evolution-has-not-prepared-your-brain-for-todays-porn/
Hi. Unfortunately they don't have much information. My sister was the first one I spoke to. She refused to listen. All she wanted to do was go and speak to her grown up kids about it because ss were going to speak to them a about my great niece and nephew not having contact with them. Now they think that he has turned into a monster and have refused all contact with me apart from the nasty messages. They don't want to listen to my side. They even tried to ring the police. They are convinced he has hurt the two littleones in the family even though he never would have or even had access to them. He would have done anything for my family.
Ah. I'm so sorry to read that. :-(
I guess they are all paragons of virtue who never made a mistake?
I guess they are all paragons of virtue who never made a mistake?
So it would seem. X