constant crippling anxiety
Notifications OFF
yesterday i found out that my boyfriend of 16 months has been under investigation following being arrested in 2023 for talking to a 15 year old girl. He would've been 21/22. He and his family are adamant she lied about her age and they did not meet, however he has been send a notice of criminal charge letter so will be due in court. I do not know what the exact charges are as the letter is unopened until his parents return from holiday tomorrow. I've also been told I cannot ask any additional questions until they are back.
I am just spiralling, I don't know how bad this all is but surely it's not looking good. I am worried that the outcome may impact my job, and the role I am training for currently. I never had any worries or concerns about anything like this so it has all come as a big shock. I want to believe him, but I'm trying to remain mindful that the is going to be more information I don't know.
How is anyone supposed to survive this waiting and uncertainty. I feel like my whole life has come crashing down within a day. I managed an hour of sleep and woke up feeling the most anxiety I ever have. I am currently not staying with him, and I left when I found out and don't know if it's sensible to return without being able to ask the questions I want to know.
I feel like my life has been ruined and all the plans I had. I love him and want it to all go away but that's not going to happen. I don't know what is the correct thing to do to protect myself and my career.
I am just spiralling, I don't know how bad this all is but surely it's not looking good. I am worried that the outcome may impact my job, and the role I am training for currently. I never had any worries or concerns about anything like this so it has all come as a big shock. I want to believe him, but I'm trying to remain mindful that the is going to be more information I don't know.
How is anyone supposed to survive this waiting and uncertainty. I feel like my whole life has come crashing down within a day. I managed an hour of sleep and woke up feeling the most anxiety I ever have. I am currently not staying with him, and I left when I found out and don't know if it's sensible to return without being able to ask the questions I want to know.
I feel like my life has been ruined and all the plans I had. I love him and want it to all go away but that's not going to happen. I don't know what is the correct thing to do to protect myself and my career.
Hello,
sorry you have found yourself here. My story different to yours but I found that the absolute shock/trauma in the first few days was the worst. For me it did turn to a dull ache of anxiety but less panic. At times it spiked. We are starting to rebuild post-sentencing but immediate was the worst. Hope that brings a little comfort.
sorry you have found yourself here. My story different to yours but I found that the absolute shock/trauma in the first few days was the worst. For me it did turn to a dull ache of anxiety but less panic. At times it spiked. We are starting to rebuild post-sentencing but immediate was the worst. Hope that brings a little comfort.
Your life isn't ruined but I won't lie and say it's an easy journey
I'm 4 years post knock and next week would have been my 36th wedding anniversary. It took me 10 months to decide to leave and it's a decision I don't regret. I wanted my close relationship with my kids to continue (would have been in doubt if I had stayed) and I didn't want to live the rest of my life with his offending hanging over me/is.
For many reasons it was totally the right decision and today I am happy and content and life is far better than I thought. And I now think that maybe it happened for a reason.
Not totally behind me - I dreamt the police were back at my door the other night. And I cannot forgive him for what he has done to his mother.
It's hard but you need to give yourself time - and be kind to yourself - you have done nothing wrong
I'm 4 years post knock and next week would have been my 36th wedding anniversary. It took me 10 months to decide to leave and it's a decision I don't regret. I wanted my close relationship with my kids to continue (would have been in doubt if I had stayed) and I didn't want to live the rest of my life with his offending hanging over me/is.
For many reasons it was totally the right decision and today I am happy and content and life is far better than I thought. And I now think that maybe it happened for a reason.
Not totally behind me - I dreamt the police were back at my door the other night. And I cannot forgive him for what he has done to his mother.
It's hard but you need to give yourself time - and be kind to yourself - you have done nothing wrong
