Constantly crying
Notifications OFF
Hello,
My situation regards my Son, (lives with me) I feel like an outsider as most comments I’ve read regard husbands/ partners.
At this stage all I know is my son Was arrested for online images and took away for questioning while our home was searched and computers and phones were seized.
Im so confused, angry, ashamed, sad and disappointed in my son and my life, I love my son so much but I’m confused and so scared of what may happen.
hewas questioned and released for further investigation. I Just don’t know what to do.
This all happened just 10 days ago and I’m just so lost as what to do.
My situation regards my Son, (lives with me) I feel like an outsider as most comments I’ve read regard husbands/ partners.
At this stage all I know is my son Was arrested for online images and took away for questioning while our home was searched and computers and phones were seized.
Im so confused, angry, ashamed, sad and disappointed in my son and my life, I love my son so much but I’m confused and so scared of what may happen.
hewas questioned and released for further investigation. I Just don’t know what to do.
This all happened just 10 days ago and I’m just so lost as what to do.
Hi I just wanted to reach out to you to let you know your not alone in this nightmare, I'm also mum to an offender, images sent and it nearly finished me off, but over time Life has moved on and although it will always be a different life you will get the strength from Deep down to help you through this.
I cried constantly for a long time to the point people just didn't really want to be near me Cos they didn't know what was going on, but I'm glad I kept it quiet, my only piece of advise would be to be careful who you tell, your son will come through this and hopefully build a new life for himself, so if you can limit any damage then it gives him a chance to try to rebuild
sorry your going through this
if you want to connect send me a pm on Mumsnet to the username I use here
sending love
Becky
I cried constantly for a long time to the point people just didn't really want to be near me Cos they didn't know what was going on, but I'm glad I kept it quiet, my only piece of advise would be to be careful who you tell, your son will come through this and hopefully build a new life for himself, so if you can limit any damage then it gives him a chance to try to rebuild
sorry your going through this
if you want to connect send me a pm on Mumsnet to the username I use here
sending love
Becky
Hi so sad
i have been where you are ten times over so I know how your feeling.
my son commited a communication offence online and he is in prison at the moment.
i did not cry but I did get very very angry with the world and still am to a point.
life does get better from what I believe from people who have been going through this longer than me.but I believe it will never be the same but you can still have a good life as some have proven on here such as sally blue .
im on mumsnet under nicenana 1 if you ever want to talk x
i have been where you are ten times over so I know how your feeling.
my son commited a communication offence online and he is in prison at the moment.
i did not cry but I did get very very angry with the world and still am to a point.
life does get better from what I believe from people who have been going through this longer than me.but I believe it will never be the same but you can still have a good life as some have proven on here such as sally blue .
im on mumsnet under nicenana 1 if you ever want to talk x
I'm also a mum of son.
Yes its different as I dont have the betrayed
Partner connection.
Just a mum of a very mixed up boy.
its a long long process,, 18 months from knock
To court so try to live life as normal.
Get him counselling of some kind.. ASAP..
I went to a couple of sessions with son just
For my own mental stresses, it really helped
They are not monsters, just misguided, gullible,
Young lads, that don't know when the line is crossed
And are very unlikely to ask for help, my son was a bit relieved it was out In the open.
I'm not on mumsnet, but take each day 1 step at a time, support, breathe
And tell him u love him every day x
Yes its different as I dont have the betrayed
Partner connection.
Just a mum of a very mixed up boy.
its a long long process,, 18 months from knock
To court so try to live life as normal.
Get him counselling of some kind.. ASAP..
I went to a couple of sessions with son just
For my own mental stresses, it really helped
They are not monsters, just misguided, gullible,
Young lads, that don't know when the line is crossed
And are very unlikely to ask for help, my son was a bit relieved it was out In the open.
I'm not on mumsnet, but take each day 1 step at a time, support, breathe
And tell him u love him every day x
I am a mum too. You are not alone. Some of the issues are the same, some are different. I agree with everything Lizzie says and repeat something I read here earlier abou our role as mothers: love, support, defend, forgive ( sorry I've forgotten who posted it but I took comfort from it a lot in the beginning)
Thankyou to you lovely ladies for your replies. Can I ask where and how you go to get counselling.
Do any of you feel differently about your sons? I feel so guilty for having some hatred towards my son but I also love him so much and can't bare the thought of him going to prison. But can't cope with what he has looked at too. I'm terrified whenever there's a knock at my door and then racing ahead to what could happen when/if it's made public knowledge.
I'm racing ahead in my mind of what happens next How do you deal with their finance etc if he's in prison. My head is so scrambled.
Do any of you feel differently about your sons? I feel so guilty for having some hatred towards my son but I also love him so much and can't bare the thought of him going to prison. But can't cope with what he has looked at too. I'm terrified whenever there's a knock at my door and then racing ahead to what could happen when/if it's made public knowledge.
I'm racing ahead in my mind of what happens next How do you deal with their finance etc if he's in prison. My head is so scrambled.
Hi so sad
i received counselling by contacting stop so and they passed my details on to a relevant therapist, I had about 6 sessions only as it was roughly £60.00 per session, then I arranged therapy through my work which was 6 free sessions of cbt, I already suffered with ptsd so every knock on my door makes me jump, even though it wasn't here the police arrested my son, definetly contact stop so if you can, there is also a forum that is more secure with lovely people on there too
take care
Becky x
i received counselling by contacting stop so and they passed my details on to a relevant therapist, I had about 6 sessions only as it was roughly £60.00 per session, then I arranged therapy through my work which was 6 free sessions of cbt, I already suffered with ptsd so every knock on my door makes me jump, even though it wasn't here the police arrested my son, definetly contact stop so if you can, there is also a forum that is more secure with lovely people on there too
take care
Becky x
The police should be able to give u/ur son
contact info on.local experienced support.
It's not cheap, we paid £500 for initial 5 day
Sex offender course/councelling then £50 per
For onward depression, someone to talk to,
Voluntary but necessary for 2 to 4 weekly
Sessions for over a year, son employed he paid
Bit was worth it for his mental health.
Also saw doc at rock bottom got anti depressants
Didnt inform doc why, but didnt need to by the
State of him when he finally agreed to get
Medical help.
My heart is with u, please dont hate him. He needs u more
Now than ever xx
contact info on.local experienced support.
It's not cheap, we paid £500 for initial 5 day
Sex offender course/councelling then £50 per
For onward depression, someone to talk to,
Voluntary but necessary for 2 to 4 weekly
Sessions for over a year, son employed he paid
Bit was worth it for his mental health.
Also saw doc at rock bottom got anti depressants
Didnt inform doc why, but didnt need to by the
State of him when he finally agreed to get
Medical help.
My heart is with u, please dont hate him. He needs u more
Now than ever xx
Hi ladies
thank you for your posts it has helped me deal with my feelings
It was my son who had the knock, he doesn't live with me shares a house with his brother at present
he has been to court etc took 18 months from the knock got 5 years SOR, 100 hours unpaid work and 3 years comm order
he has never been in trouble before, his pre sentence report was very good sees prob off once a month
when it happened I was in shock , disbelief and felt angry towards him, feelings which I am sure you all can appreciate
I love my son and forgave him , my son, his brother, my ex husband and I as a family were and still are extremely careful about speaking about this with anyone , we want my son to try and get on with his life and we are trying to move forward taking a day at a time.
I have only told 2 of my closest friends who have been very supportive however I cannot bring myself to tell them how much I am hurting I feel as though I am in a bad dream and will wake up and everything will be as though none of this has happened. Does that make sense?
I feel terrible and extremely sad for the children who are in the images and videos and wish they could be saved from further abuse.
thanks for listening
thank you for your posts it has helped me deal with my feelings
It was my son who had the knock, he doesn't live with me shares a house with his brother at present
he has been to court etc took 18 months from the knock got 5 years SOR, 100 hours unpaid work and 3 years comm order
he has never been in trouble before, his pre sentence report was very good sees prob off once a month
when it happened I was in shock , disbelief and felt angry towards him, feelings which I am sure you all can appreciate
I love my son and forgave him , my son, his brother, my ex husband and I as a family were and still are extremely careful about speaking about this with anyone , we want my son to try and get on with his life and we are trying to move forward taking a day at a time.
I have only told 2 of my closest friends who have been very supportive however I cannot bring myself to tell them how much I am hurting I feel as though I am in a bad dream and will wake up and everything will be as though none of this has happened. Does that make sense?
I feel terrible and extremely sad for the children who are in the images and videos and wish they could be saved from further abuse.
thanks for listening