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We are 7 months post sentencing, still together and trying to find a way to move forward and put this whole mess behind us. Today I witnessed my husband lose hope of ever doing that. After he was sentenced our landlord asked us to leave our rental property and so for the last 5 months we've been staying in a friends house. We have finally managed, after several attempts, to secure a new rental property. The new landlord is fully aware of the situation but believes we need the break to move forward. The removal van is booked, the boxes are ready then this afternoon my husband gets a call from his irate police risk officer who says under no circumstances is he able to move into the new house as there is a children's nursery within close proximity.
We are devastated. My husband is a broken man. Either my son and I take the house without him or we''ll all by homeless by next week.
I know my husband is a convicted sex offender (downloading images) but with no geographical restrictions on his SHPO we didn't think we were doing anything wrong. He abides by all the restrictions he has with no issues, but we can't be allowed to move forward.
I just dont know where to go or what to do. I've stayed strong through this whole process but today has broken our spirits, I feel so alone right now.
We are devastated. My husband is a broken man. Either my son and I take the house without him or we''ll all by homeless by next week.
I know my husband is a convicted sex offender (downloading images) but with no geographical restrictions on his SHPO we didn't think we were doing anything wrong. He abides by all the restrictions he has with no issues, but we can't be allowed to move forward.
I just dont know where to go or what to do. I've stayed strong through this whole process but today has broken our spirits, I feel so alone right now.
Hi chick this doesn't sound good.
How close is the nursery?
We are 5 weeks post sentencing and I cant even remember our ppu officer mentioning anything about the 2 schools that are at either end of your street. Dont think they have even gone I to the schools to tell them about my hubby.
Is there no one you can speak to about this? My hubby has a probation officer and a ppu office that have been fantastic so far ( touch wood).
Sending love and hugs stay strong xxxx
How close is the nursery?
We are 5 weeks post sentencing and I cant even remember our ppu officer mentioning anything about the 2 schools that are at either end of your street. Dont think they have even gone I to the schools to tell them about my hubby.
Is there no one you can speak to about this? My hubby has a probation officer and a ppu office that have been fantastic so far ( touch wood).
Sending love and hugs stay strong xxxx
WHAAAAAT? This seems bonkers to me - given that non contact abuse and contact abuse seem to be very very different things from what I've learned since our 'knock'. Has your husband had a risk assessment done by a StopSo therapist or the LFF?
I am so sad for you all... what an horrendous situation to be caught in.
I am so sad for you all... what an horrendous situation to be caught in.
Hi BellaRose, housing can be tricky. Have you put yourself onto Housing Associations wait lists? Before they offer you the property they perform area scand to make sure the area fits his needs. Properties can be deemed unsuitable if close to vulnerable children in the care system, being too close to other registered offenders or even of the landlord has a criminal record.
Sometimes it seems we just arent given a break, that we have so many more restrictions than those who own property.contact Shelter ASAP, they can provide help and assistance x
Sometimes it seems we just arent given a break, that we have so many more restrictions than those who own property.contact Shelter ASAP, they can provide help and assistance x
Thanks everyone for your support and advice. Our current situation is this, at the insistance of my husband, my son and I are still taking the house, he says that this is his way of ensuring that we're safe. He will not be moving with us and we have to hope that the 'system' will provide for him.
It's not what any of us wanted but we feel we have no choice.
I have also reported his police risk officer as his mis-handling of the situation has left my husband in a worse state than he was to begin with (which wasnt great).
We totally respect that systems and procedures need to be adhered to but they need to have a better system for allowing people to move forward.
Hopefully we'll get sorted eventually and manage to live under the same roof.
It's not what any of us wanted but we feel we have no choice.
I have also reported his police risk officer as his mis-handling of the situation has left my husband in a worse state than he was to begin with (which wasnt great).
We totally respect that systems and procedures need to be adhered to but they need to have a better system for allowing people to move forward.
Hopefully we'll get sorted eventually and manage to live under the same roof.
Bellarose - that is such a generous and loving thing for your husband to have done. I do hope you can find a way to be together again soon. I'll be interested to hear the outcome of your complaint about the 'risk handling' police officer.
It's very apparent that this whole area could benefit from some research and a logical cross border protocol that everyone ought to follow - there seems to be a big post code lottery in how people and families are treated across the county,
It's very apparent that this whole area could benefit from some research and a logical cross border protocol that everyone ought to follow - there seems to be a big post code lottery in how people and families are treated across the county,