The beginning of the end...
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So my hubby tried to take his own life a week ago. Why, because he couldn't face up to everything, he lied about the category's, he lied about the court date. He was in court and because he hadn't the courage to meet with this solicitor nothing was prepared so he went with a no plea. It will now go to crown court next month. I only learned of this when I searched his car whilst he was in hospital. He is now home with telephone only support due to the corona virus, otherwise he would have either been admitted or have to attend daily with the mental health crisis team. After 15 months since this all started I believed him, I was supporting him, I was hopeful after all this was over we could spend our lives together as planned 23 years ago. His mental health is far far worse than I ever imagined but he didn't let me in. He never let anyone in.... ever. I thought I was the 1 person in his whole life who he trusted.... obviously not. I am so angry, I have no idea what to do or how to help him, or myself. Has anyone else been through this, I need help ????
Hi E
I totally understand you feeling angry but maybe he was to ashamed to tell you, to admit how deep he was in. Maybe he was worried about your reaction, maybe he thought you would leave.
Keeping all that in must have played heavily on his mental health and now it's gone to court he has no choice but to deal with it.
Its either that or he's just in total denial, only you would know the answer to that.
Has he tried to get any help for this? Perhaps he could ring the LF helpline, they would be a support for him
Make sure you are looking after you too, this isn't just about him, it's about you too
Take care xx
I totally understand you feeling angry but maybe he was to ashamed to tell you, to admit how deep he was in. Maybe he was worried about your reaction, maybe he thought you would leave.
Keeping all that in must have played heavily on his mental health and now it's gone to court he has no choice but to deal with it.
Its either that or he's just in total denial, only you would know the answer to that.
Has he tried to get any help for this? Perhaps he could ring the LF helpline, they would be a support for him
Make sure you are looking after you too, this isn't just about him, it's about you too
Take care xx
I'm so sorry for what you're going through E. I am no longer living with my husband, and can't see that we will ever be back together. I do keep in touch with him though and worry about his health. His mental health is not at all good, and through his therapy we now know that he, like your husband has been suffering for a long time, and not addressing it. Like you, I thought I knew everything about him, and trusted him completely. It is like a death really for me, as the person I lived, wasn't who I thought he was. This whole experience, whatever the outcome will take some time to recover from.
I feel for you. There cannot be a worse time to have a need for health services. Perhaps there are councillors/therapists that could work online using a video conference app? Otherwise, Try as many helplines as you can for him. And for you. Take care of you. That's really important.
Virtua hugs xx
I feel for you. There cannot be a worse time to have a need for health services. Perhaps there are councillors/therapists that could work online using a video conference app? Otherwise, Try as many helplines as you can for him. And for you. Take care of you. That's really important.
Virtua hugs xx
Hi E
I feel for you. My husband tried to kill himself when he suspected ( correctly as it turned out) that his access to illegal images had been discovered. He spent 3 weeks in hospital and was put on anti depressants and anti anxiety medication. I do hope your husband has been given medication of some sort?
We got all our help from Lucy Faithfull, and more recently we have paid for sessions from StopSo, at the moment by phone.
There is help available but it doesn't come easily, you have to go and find it.
He's still got a lot of work to do on his mental health and will probably have to do it forever. Men who get into this mess gave usually got very disturbed thinking and it takes a long time to unpick it and reestablish healthy positive thoughts.
Hang on, it will get better. X
I feel for you. My husband tried to kill himself when he suspected ( correctly as it turned out) that his access to illegal images had been discovered. He spent 3 weeks in hospital and was put on anti depressants and anti anxiety medication. I do hope your husband has been given medication of some sort?
We got all our help from Lucy Faithfull, and more recently we have paid for sessions from StopSo, at the moment by phone.
There is help available but it doesn't come easily, you have to go and find it.
He's still got a lot of work to do on his mental health and will probably have to do it forever. Men who get into this mess gave usually got very disturbed thinking and it takes a long time to unpick it and reestablish healthy positive thoughts.
Hang on, it will get better. X