Family and Friends Forum

I would recommend phoning the police station he is registered with. They will advise you on what the steps are. They may give him a certain time to call in at, do an extension over the phone or something else. Call them in the morning, if you dont have their number call 101 and they can put you through to the relevant department. It will be best if he phones. X

Hi Jake I'm in the same place as you, my son is actively seeking help, and is getting some through LFF but private counselling is so expensive, I really wish there was more help out there, to help them through this devastating situation. My son is so remorseful and we are all still in shock. His bail is up middle of this month too, and not sure what will happen, please keep in touch and let me know how you get on. I'm worried sick, and blessed in a way that the lockdown is on and I can work from home, as I don't feel worthy of peoples sympathy when I'm just breaking down all the time, and obviously you can't talk to anyone about it xx

Hi Jake I'm in the same place as you, my son is actively seeking help, and is getting some through LFF but private counselling is so expensive, I really wish there was more help out there, to help them through this devastating situation. My son is so remorseful and we are all still in shock. His bail is up middle of this month too, and not sure what will happen, please keep in touch and let me know how you get on. I'm worried sick, and blessed in a way that the lockdown is on and I can work from home, as I don't feel worthy of peoples sympathy when I'm just breaking down all the time, and obviously you can't talk to anyone about it xx

Hi ladies,

When my sons bail was up the Police contacted him to extened it. They then set another date 4 weeks in the future. I think the Police should contact you not the other way round. Give the help line a ring I have found them very supportive and understanding. He is now charged and court date in place. Dreading the result but trying to stay strong for him. thats all we can do.

Hi Jake and Helpless, I'm grateful to talk to other mums as a lot seem to be husbands. Where the pain is just as devastating, it's different. My heart wants to protect and help my son, my head can't cope, or understand what he has done. We are in early days, but my quiet, non aggressive son, who has a beautiful girlfriend and a well paid job, seems to have thrown this all away. I fear knowledge, friends and family finding out, and as you say, prison. He would never ever cope with it. He too is vulnerable, desperately trying to get help and doing courses, with all my heart I want to rewind that this never happened. I know you all feel the same but how on earth did this happen to us ? We are hard working honest, normal citizens, thrown into THE worst situation.

Hi Ladies,

my son had a really good job that he loved and was excellent at. He was suspended as police informed them. Did lived a 100miles away and so to frighten to tell me he had been investgated by police for groaming offences. Totally out of character, the lad had contacted him on an adult gay dating site. He is so upset and suicidal that he let the chat carry on. When he did tell me I carried all the time I couldn't believe he'd done such a thing. The papers found out not sure how and he had to come and stay with me as feared for this life. He has has a good solicitor (I hope). He wS bailed tomagistrates court. Solicitor asked cps for details of case as police wouldn't release them. Cps couldn't find any paperwork so he rang court. My son was not down for that date or any other. Solicitor then had goring police who resubmitted papers. It was cps who told police to charge my son what a mess. My son had just about accepted court but now gone to pieces with another 5 weeks waited. He's devastated as the letter came to my address and convinced the court will release where he's living and it gets into local rag. He's now more mentally ill was he's involved me. I've contacted help line who have been brilliant but could of say either way, solicitor going to try but can't guarantee. Some days I'm ok others are just hell. I have a good job and dread them finding out. If it wasn't for this forums the wonderful ladies I don't know what I'd have done. It's lovely to know other mum's can support me.stay strong for our son they need us.

I hope it's not a prison sentence Jake but I assure you he will be ok. My husband is autistic and has schizophrenic tendencies (there is no test to see if it will turn to schizophrenia we just have to take a wait and see attitude), he served prison time. He hated it, with food reason, but he was safe. He was in a unit that was mainly RSOs, they were in their cells for 23 hours a day. It's not like in films with the "what you in for?" Its not spoken of. He had a cell mate and they watched TV.

One day at a time. Do not worry too much about what may happen. You do need to be prepared. His solicitor will know what the likely outcome may be x

Hi

Registered sex offender.

Hugs xx