Family and Friends Forum

Christine_123

Member since
April 2020

190 posts

Posted Thu May 7, 2020 3:45pmReport post

I feel so low at the minute i know everyone will be in the same boat but I feel so hopeless. The lockdown has understandably been extended in Scotland but I'm terrified my ex (we're trying to work through things) will go to jail before it's up and I'll not get to see him, feel so helpless and struggling to see any positives at the minute just feel so alone as my friends have abandoned me for trying to sort things between me and him I just feel so alone

Ann P

Member since
February 2020

169 posts

Posted Thu May 7, 2020 4:41pmReport post

Hi Christine I'm so sorry to hear you're having a bad day. You're right the lockdown intensifies everything. We are all here going through a nightmarish time without the lockdown added in. I sympathise so much with you for supporting your partner. I have too (indecent images conviction, not sentenced yet) it's caused a lot of distress with one my adult children saying she doesn't think she can have a relationship with me if I support him. I'm devastated by that and hope she'll change her mind.

I know it's easy to say, but the feeling will pass. I had a shocking day on Tuesday following a phone call with my daughters, spent the day crying and not much better yesterday. But I'm calmer today.

Is there anything you can do just for you, a nice scented bath or a walk? I know it seems silly but it might just lift you a bit.

Lots of love x

Ren

Member since
January 2020

78 posts

Posted Thu May 7, 2020 5:11pmReport post

This might sound silly or strange but I find that if I stand facing the sun (doesn't have to be out) with my feet spread apart and my hands on my hips ( superhero stance) close my eyes and just be for a few moments dont think just feel the sun or wind it works wonders for me.

I also like to put my head phones and have a dance about the house.

Totalyheartbroken

Member since
April 2020

97 posts

Posted Thu May 7, 2020 6:51pmReport post

Hi sweetie , it is such a hard time for us all an no fault of our own . I like to lie on tbe sofa with the sun shining on me or rain and just listen to the worls go by or put my head phones on and listen to some music and just zone out. If i am having a bad day and find it hard to relax i have a bath with music. Hugs

Christine_123

Member since
April 2020

190 posts

Posted Thu May 7, 2020 7:07pmReport post

I just want to cry, I'm working a lot too as a carer so just feel so overwhelmed

Ren

Member since
January 2020

78 posts

Posted Thu May 7, 2020 8:40pmReport post

Have you been to the docs.

I have been on antidepressants since the beginning of all this for me. I was very tearful and felt sick all the time. They do really help. People just dont understand how this affects us mentally,emotionally and physically.

Stay strong chicks xxx

D1286

Member since
November 2019

65 posts

Posted Thu May 7, 2020 9:57pmReport post

Hi ladies

Firstly I'm so sorry your going through this situation. I've not been on here for a while but I wanted to give you some positivity. A bit of back ground.

I'm a wife of an offender (indecent images) and we struggled for a while but I stook with him and supported him to get help with a porn addiction which caused these issues. I spent alot of time on these forums and got close to a couple of amazing ladies (you know who you are) and I'm still in contact with now. It all started in September 2018 for us and the second interview wasn't until November 2019. My husband went to court in January and was finally convicted in February just before lockdown.

I just want to let you all know I still have bad days every now and again but it does get easier. I used the forums and connected on Mumsnet with a couple of ladies for support. My family don't know any of it but his do and we are currently living with them due to the lockdown. On bad days I used to colour and go for a walk, I also allowed myself to cry as and when I needed I was put on antidepressants and I'm still on them but they helped too. Ring the stop it now hotline they are so helpful.

It gets easier I promise just take it all one day at a time or even hour by hour on your bad days it does end eventually and you can get on with a new normal life.

Christine_123

Member since
April 2020

190 posts

Posted Thu May 7, 2020 10:37pmReport post

The doctors are only doing telephone appointments now. I feel like I need antidepressants as I'm struggling a lot I got given antibiotics when I was 16 due to mental health from issues from my past but I never took them partly because I don't want to rely on a tablet to be "happy" but this has just floored me and I feel I need some help, I don't know who I am anymore. Just don't know what I'd say to the dr because it was 6 months ago they maybe won't give me anything at the time they didn't want to give me anything and told me the best thing I'd have is a good support system but I feel I need something

D1286

Member since
November 2019

65 posts

Posted Thu May 7, 2020 10:49pmReport post

Hi Christine

Doctors can be reluctant to give antidepressants but if you ask them they should give them even on a phone consultation as the lockdown is added stress too. The helpline was very helpful when I rang them too. I am so sorry your going through this. I suffer from mental health issues too and it took a suicide attempt for me to be taken seriously but they did in the end. Keep at them even over the phone. You don't have to be on antidepressants all your life you can come off them when you feel ready but at this time in this situation I think you might need them. if you want you can contact me on Mumsnet if you want and we can chat more. Only if you want to though