Social services
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Hi everyone.
I'd like to know people's experiences with social services please. I've spoken to the helpline about it already but I gather it can be very dependant on your individual circumstances.
My husband is due out next summer and we'd very much like to have children (we have none at the moment). I know I will have to prove to SS that I can be a good mother. I understand that they will want to come and risk assess us (which is fair enough) if I get pregnant - will he be asked to move out during this time? :(
Whilst he was on bail we took lots of preventative measures and both went on courses with the LFF. Are these the kinds of things that SS like to see? We also only have contact now with supportive friends and family who accept the situation.
I hope that makes sense - my thoughts can sometimes get very muddled!
Thanks a lot.
I'd like to know people's experiences with social services please. I've spoken to the helpline about it already but I gather it can be very dependant on your individual circumstances.
My husband is due out next summer and we'd very much like to have children (we have none at the moment). I know I will have to prove to SS that I can be a good mother. I understand that they will want to come and risk assess us (which is fair enough) if I get pregnant - will he be asked to move out during this time? :(
Whilst he was on bail we took lots of preventative measures and both went on courses with the LFF. Are these the kinds of things that SS like to see? We also only have contact now with supportive friends and family who accept the situation.
I hope that makes sense - my thoughts can sometimes get very muddled!
Thanks a lot.
Its a really difficult one with child services, they have a very difficult job. Safe guarding will be their only goal regardless of how you feel and what you want so i would imagine you might have a tough time. When he is released is he on licence, how long is he on sex offenders register. Having a baby is a wonderful thing but pregnancy can be hard and a new born baby is hard work (as well as being amazing) i cant imagine how it would be having a baby knowing social services where there watching you, hopefully someone else will have experience of that and advise you. I dont know how soon you plan to start a family but perhaps in a year or two things will have settled down and he will be able to demonstrate he has fully rehabilitated, probation will be able to confirm his progress and social services will be able to see that. Hopefully someone else will have some advice for you but its incredibly stressful dealing with child services and it really comes down to the area you live and luck as to whether you get a good/knowledgeable social worker. Seek as much as advice as you canand dont rush into starting a family until you are more settled and have got all the advice.
Evening ladies.
Thanks for your replies so far, I really do appreciate it. When he comes home it will have been 2.5 years since his arrest (inc bail and prison) so there's been plenty of time to think about things, both on my own and with my counsellor.
I won't rush into anything (good advice, thanks) because we'll first have to get used to our new life with the invovlement of probation (for 15 months) and the provisions of the register (which he is on for life).
Previously I worked in admin for Children's Services (the irony) so I met a lot of social workers and you're right, some are more understanding than others. I'll learn as much as possible before they (potentially) become part of our life - obviously there is no guarentee that I will even be able to get pregnant. That's a bridge to be crossed at a later date!
Any more stories/experiences will be very welcome.
Take care and be strong.
Thanks for your replies so far, I really do appreciate it. When he comes home it will have been 2.5 years since his arrest (inc bail and prison) so there's been plenty of time to think about things, both on my own and with my counsellor.
I won't rush into anything (good advice, thanks) because we'll first have to get used to our new life with the invovlement of probation (for 15 months) and the provisions of the register (which he is on for life).
Previously I worked in admin for Children's Services (the irony) so I met a lot of social workers and you're right, some are more understanding than others. I'll learn as much as possible before they (potentially) become part of our life - obviously there is no guarentee that I will even be able to get pregnant. That's a bridge to be crossed at a later date!
Any more stories/experiences will be very welcome.
Take care and be strong.
Hi CrazyMayBaby,
i think the advice so far has been helpful but you’ll need a formal assessment of your circumstances which will include information and any risk assessments from probation and other agencies. Where I used to work this specialised assessment wouldn’t take place whilst you were thinking of having a family but when you were pregnant. Crazy really because you can’t make an informed choice to go ahead until you’d created a life. Things may be different where you live or on the resources available to your local authority. Any plans for your child will be agreed on a multi agency basis but the lead agency is SS. It’s doubtful that any Social Worker would have the necessary in depth training to conduct a specialised assessment so the LA would need to instruct an independent agency.
I don’t know the details of your partners offence but just take things a step at a time but be clear you want to work with the authorities in order to ensure the safety of your child. Above all get as much direct advice as you can and you may need to get the advice of a good solicitor who specialises in family law.
i think the advice so far has been helpful but you’ll need a formal assessment of your circumstances which will include information and any risk assessments from probation and other agencies. Where I used to work this specialised assessment wouldn’t take place whilst you were thinking of having a family but when you were pregnant. Crazy really because you can’t make an informed choice to go ahead until you’d created a life. Things may be different where you live or on the resources available to your local authority. Any plans for your child will be agreed on a multi agency basis but the lead agency is SS. It’s doubtful that any Social Worker would have the necessary in depth training to conduct a specialised assessment so the LA would need to instruct an independent agency.
I don’t know the details of your partners offence but just take things a step at a time but be clear you want to work with the authorities in order to ensure the safety of your child. Above all get as much direct advice as you can and you may need to get the advice of a good solicitor who specialises in family law.