Picking up the pieces
Notifications OFF
45 weeks and 2 days since the knock ......... and today my husband signed all the paperwork to accept a simple caution and went on the SOR.
We don't live together right now but we do see each other - he came round in tears and I told him to remember this day for the rest of his life and if he's ever tempted to log onto an online chat room every again, then to stop and recall the pain and devastation he's put us all through.
I'm not sure if there's ever going to be a why but I hope that in time, he can draw from his experience to help others and I can also.
We have a long road ahead now and only time will tell if we end up together or apart. I hope that one day I will be able to find forgiveness to help us both.
Knowing the forum is always here has meant I have never felt alone - Thank you. Sending love and light and strength and hope to you all xx
We don't live together right now but we do see each other - he came round in tears and I told him to remember this day for the rest of his life and if he's ever tempted to log onto an online chat room every again, then to stop and recall the pain and devastation he's put us all through.
I'm not sure if there's ever going to be a why but I hope that in time, he can draw from his experience to help others and I can also.
We have a long road ahead now and only time will tell if we end up together or apart. I hope that one day I will be able to find forgiveness to help us both.
Knowing the forum is always here has meant I have never felt alone - Thank you. Sending love and light and strength and hope to you all xx
Wow am so pleased you got through this. Whatva strong wiman you are . Good luck for the future. Hugs xx
Flower123 what a lovely post, the future is so uncertain and in a way I wish I too was 45 weeks in, but only one month, then to knowing if he will go to jail, lose his job, we will be targeted etc is awful, I feel like I'm in a bubble at the moment, I wish you all the very best in whatever you decide to do, I think forgiveness is sometimes deserved, not always easy, but if genuine remorse is shown, maybe, it's your choice and I too, wish you all the love, strength and happiness for your future, whatever it holds
I'm so pleased flower that you are now able to start to rebuild your life in which ever shape or form that maybe. Did I read a post previously as to whether your husband would accept the caution or not (sorry if it wasn't you). What was the reason he accepted it and did the police/solicitor say what would happen if he didn't accept the caution?
Hi, I'm so pleased for you that the investigation side has come to an end for you at least. That must be a relief and the start of your journey back to 'normal'. I think in o w your posts you were saying that the person your husband was communicating with may have been a vigilante. So you mind me asking if that was the case? My husband was caught in a vigilante sting. He says he thought he was meeting a woman. The police are now tracking down some of the people he was chatting with. He was having a break down so god knows who to what! But I now know he'd been meeting random women. I'm terrified at what they may have trapped him with. He's been assessed as having no interest in underage. These people are evil.
Anyway, all the very best to you and your family, I wish you a very happy futurex
Anyway, all the very best to you and your family, I wish you a very happy futurex
Summer/Tabs - it was me.
The solicitor reviewed the evidence the police sent him (which I had already had read out to me by SS) and advised him to accept the caution. The police said his file was 'court ready' and although there was maybe (??) a chance he could go to court and get off, he took the solicitor's advice. We have an unusal surname and he knew I didn't want that name reported.
Will never know for definite but the solicitor we saw at the start said it looked like vigilante work. I think the fact the victim has a say in what happens to the offender and I would expect the family would have wanted him in court also suggests vigilante. Nothing excuses his action but someone in an over 18 chat room suggested moving to Kik where the person then said they were 14. According to him, the 14 yo then kept bobbing up to chat.
I will still check in here and will always always help anyone that I can.
x
The solicitor reviewed the evidence the police sent him (which I had already had read out to me by SS) and advised him to accept the caution. The police said his file was 'court ready' and although there was maybe (??) a chance he could go to court and get off, he took the solicitor's advice. We have an unusal surname and he knew I didn't want that name reported.
Will never know for definite but the solicitor we saw at the start said it looked like vigilante work. I think the fact the victim has a say in what happens to the offender and I would expect the family would have wanted him in court also suggests vigilante. Nothing excuses his action but someone in an over 18 chat room suggested moving to Kik where the person then said they were 14. According to him, the 14 yo then kept bobbing up to chat.
I will still check in here and will always always help anyone that I can.
x
Sorry - I have explaned this sooooo badly.
If there had been an actual victim/14 yo, I think the family would have pressed for him to go to court.
I thought that given he had just had a caution, it pointed to vigilante/undercover work.
that make more sense?
If there had been an actual victim/14 yo, I think the family would have pressed for him to go to court.
I thought that given he had just had a caution, it pointed to vigilante/undercover work.
that make more sense?
Hi flower
We are about 43 weeks in and nothing for some time, I'm glad you're over the hurdle.
x
We are about 43 weeks in and nothing for some time, I'm glad you're over the hurdle.
x
Hi flower123
Am so pleased for your family your husband got a caution, not a court hearing.
My partner was caught by vigilantes, so there was no actual victim. His solicitor thinks his will go to court tho, do you mind if I contact you on mumsnet? I am Mabel111 on there.
thanks
Mabel x x
Am so pleased for your family your husband got a caution, not a court hearing.
My partner was caught by vigilantes, so there was no actual victim. His solicitor thinks his will go to court tho, do you mind if I contact you on mumsnet? I am Mabel111 on there.
thanks
Mabel x x
My Partner was also caught by Vigilante but they knocked on our door and lived streamed over social media
He pleaded guilty pretty much straight away and end up with a 6 months suspended for 12 months 8 months into his suspended he the police knocked on his door as the same group had caught him again although he stopped the conversation as soon as the decoy told them her age it was a breach of his SHPO
He currently doing a 10 months sentence
He pleaded guilty pretty much straight away and end up with a 6 months suspended for 12 months 8 months into his suspended he the police knocked on his door as the same group had caught him again although he stopped the conversation as soon as the decoy told them her age it was a breach of his SHPO
He currently doing a 10 months sentence