Prison...
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Five weeks in, and living in a (no one knows yet) bubble, I've been thrown backwards after being told, my sons crimes are no warranting a suspended sentence by his solicitor. I was praying this is what he would get, now this is not possible. I'm completely distraught. His job, his future, all our futures now will have this habpnging over us. In prison I know from my previous job that the sex offenders wing is the most hated of all, and I'm crying myself to sleep every night, wondering how I, and he will survive this. After many hours of talking to him, I still don't know WHY? X
Hi I'm in Wales. Apparently there are different levels but once you exceed these, a prison term is inevitable. I don't want to know all he has done, I can't take it, but I know downloading and sharing photos and videos, he says he hasn't touched a child and has no sexual interest in them, but the aggravating factors, out way mitigation. So length of time he was doing, category, sharing, etc outweigh and the solicitor said it is custodial if police charge him with all he has admitted to
Thank you so much Lee1969. I don't know the full extent of what he has done. I'm certain it's online not met anyone but he did admit to chatting. He spoke to the solicitor and had written all this down and went on a downward spiral after, as he too was hoping for suspended sentence. Yes he has spoken to Lff psychiatrist and is now paying privately for a councillor every week and doing the modules. He is not eating or sleeping much and started to drink, which he never used to. He is so remorseful and it just breaks my heart to see him like it, I'm so in disbelief that MY son, would do this, it's just unbelievable, like a bad dream, but it's true. You are right, it depends on the judge on the day and is there a jury too? I don't know. I want to sleep and wake up and non of this has happened , but worse it will get I know x
Ah thank you Lee1969. He is intending to plead guilty. So just up to the judge then which may or may not be good I suppose depending on the judge. Thank you for the information I will certainly look at these and show them to him. It's so sad the helps comes after, and no place to go to help during. I really appreciate your response. I don't feel so alone with everyone on here. Lots of love to you too xx
I'm not really understanding anything atm. I've had no contact or answers from my now ex partner. Hes on remand atm for fraud which I was told possibly 6yrs . He will then be charged with his internet stuff. All I know is he looked downloaded and spoke in a forum with others about his fantasies. Hes has never put hands on . He started off with an addiction to porn . It must of got worse. I never actually knew how much porn he was watching as I was always in work. It was a adult material until he went looking for the other. I actually thought he had another woman or meeting them from dating sites. So when I got the knock 2 weeks this morning I was absolutely shocked. Apart from this forum I've found no support. The after effects from the knock are bad enough. Just left with a leaflet in a mess. I'm in south Wales and never knew anything about police and these type of crimes. They are doing thier job I understand that. But when they're all gone and your left bewildered and in shock. I thi k with the court will it be the same again. I have only been told hes looking at custodial sentence for fraud atm and the knock one will follow. I'm sure thses last 2 weeks have been hell for many. I am concerned about his well being and do worry about him . This isn't the man I knew.
I did have a call from the prison recently. It was from a mental health nurse. Spoke briefly but no more. I passed on that I'm worried about him and have sent him a letter. I want some answers but not expecting full truths. I'm hoping hes seeking help. I was taken aback when I was told hes settled in well. Settled in well ! Life for the rest of us trying to deal with this mess is certainly not going well. I truly hope he will seek professional help. As far as we are concerned I can't get past the breakdown of love and trust hes destroyed with me. I will stay in contact but if I have nothing back I'm going to walk away completely. I'm still trying to process everything. I'm getting better very very slowly. I'm expecting to hear of a lengthy sentence for the fraud and the internet activity plus some. I'm sat with his reminders all around me. But am starting to get angry. Why ain't he in as much turmoil like me?? It feels so unfair hes doing ok and I'm a mess. I'm not up to going to court it's very soon. I'm glad that he's admitted his guilt on all of his actions. Now he will ultimately have a price to pay. Hes on remand as he's looking at a custodial sentence. I honestly think he thought he would not of got caught. I'm thankful that help is available to him and prison will give him plenty of years to reflect and face what hes done. This is one hell of a journey for many of us. I'm not turning my back on him completely but I need some healing time myself. Hes actually got more professional support than I can access. I'm into my 2nd week and it's like being on the worst ride of your life. Sorry to babble I have to get things out my system. To all of the others on here. Your words have given me strength when I was at my lowest point. To know it's not just you gives me hope that someone somewhere else is fighting the same battle. Stay strong positive and take care. Xx
Hi contact me on mums net same user name if you want to. Xx
Sorry username is the same xx
Not sure what to say
Hi Luxy i am in Wales to.