Telling work
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I'm in a dilemma. My husband was charged yesterday and as yet I haven't told work. I work for a small organisation and whilst my manager is nice, she is a terrible gossip with questionable boundaries and I'm not sure she can be discreet. I know I'd appreciate some support and understanding though. I'm worried that if it gets reported in the media and I haven't told them it doesn't look good.
I'd really appreciate your thoughts....
I'd really appreciate your thoughts....
I never told work the whole story tbh. I told my line manager I needed to go to court to attend a sentencing of someone close to me with potential prison sentence on the the cards. I just gave her the heads up that if they were sent to prison I would need a few days off to process it.
I haven't been with my company long so I don't feel comfortable sharing info about the conviction. But there is a counselling service available for me of I want it.
About your boss, surely legally she would have to keep it to herself unless the charges will be deemed a threat to the area of work you do? It is up to you of you reach out at work but for me it has been a good escape to go into work knowing that no one will ask about the conviction. But i do understand your concern about what if goes to the press. That is why I recommend give them a vague heads-up about the court hearing and it's potential impact on you, as a minimum disclosure.
I haven't been with my company long so I don't feel comfortable sharing info about the conviction. But there is a counselling service available for me of I want it.
About your boss, surely legally she would have to keep it to herself unless the charges will be deemed a threat to the area of work you do? It is up to you of you reach out at work but for me it has been a good escape to go into work knowing that no one will ask about the conviction. But i do understand your concern about what if goes to the press. That is why I recommend give them a vague heads-up about the court hearing and it's potential impact on you, as a minimum disclosure.
Thanks so much for taking time to reply. You've really given me something to think about. I won't be going to court so wouldn't need time off as such for that - I guess it would just be helpful for them to know in terms of childcare etc and husband no longer being able to share the load! But I definitely don't trust that she'd keep it to herself so I'm a little torn!
Hi,
I don't often post on here any more, but felt compelled to reply to your post.
Think twice before you disclose this at work. I don't know your circumstances or anything about your line of work, but remember that once you've told someone you can't make them unhear it.
I told my boss, so that I could get some flexibility with childcare. Whilst he seemed supportive at first, I actually ended up having to leave because he made work unbearable and didn't feel I was coping in the right way; he believed I should have told my mum what was going on and, when I didn't, he threatened to do it himself. I left and, if I'd had the energy, I would have lodged a unfair dismissal suit, but I couldn't face that on top of everything else. When I got my current job I decided I wouldn't tell them unless I absolutely had to. The investigation is now over and I didn't disclose anything. Instead, if I need flexibility I just say I have things going on at home/partner is working, so can I work flexibly to sort out the school run.
Sorry, I don't mean to scare you but I wish someone had told me it's ok not to tell work.
Good luck, whatever you decide xx
I don't often post on here any more, but felt compelled to reply to your post.
Think twice before you disclose this at work. I don't know your circumstances or anything about your line of work, but remember that once you've told someone you can't make them unhear it.
I told my boss, so that I could get some flexibility with childcare. Whilst he seemed supportive at first, I actually ended up having to leave because he made work unbearable and didn't feel I was coping in the right way; he believed I should have told my mum what was going on and, when I didn't, he threatened to do it himself. I left and, if I'd had the energy, I would have lodged a unfair dismissal suit, but I couldn't face that on top of everything else. When I got my current job I decided I wouldn't tell them unless I absolutely had to. The investigation is now over and I didn't disclose anything. Instead, if I need flexibility I just say I have things going on at home/partner is working, so can I work flexibly to sort out the school run.
Sorry, I don't mean to scare you but I wish someone had told me it's ok not to tell work.
Good luck, whatever you decide xx
Whoa that's terrible. Poor you. What an awful thing to happen.
Thank you for taking the time to comment. You've definitely given me something to think about. Xx
Thank you for taking the time to comment. You've definitely given me something to think about. Xx