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Family network meeting

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Stardust

Member since
November 2018

54 posts

Posted Wed December 26, 2018 3:17pmReport post

Sw phoned Friday to see how things are as she not been in touch or seen us for ages. She sed in new year we will have a family network meeting or something. Has anybody had one before wat did it entail please. I'm not looking forward to it as obviously family members ect involved. My parents dont want anything to do with my husband are upset angry an wortied about me and the kids. They also think thwt he shud not be allowed to live with us again after wat he did. I feel this is not goi g to help my case at all xx

Jaded

Member since
December 2018

202 posts

Posted Wed December 26, 2018 4:00pmReport post

Hi, whilst I’ve not had any experience of this meeting I think it was called something else where I worked. I would think it’s to facilitate a plan where the family are involved in its formulation, using trusted family members to supervise contact? The trouble is it’s does differ slightly depending on locality area and even the knowledge and expertise of the SW involved. Try to stay calm and listen to your families worries, allow the social worker to challenge the media fed beliefs of some of your family but above all you must be seen to protect your child above all else. I’m sure you know that.

Stardust

Member since
November 2018

54 posts

Posted Sat January 19, 2019 7:12pmReport post

Update from yesterday's meeting.

The was suppose to be about the social can't be involved for ever and putting a plan in place so family members no we're to go if they have any worries. But no it was he'll.

Well it was awful. They all think I have been groomed by my husband my were very quick to get in an agree with them saying that they believe that this has happened from the beginning of us been together.

There are no concerns about health or school for the children. Head worried about how eldest is dealing with it all as doesn't talk about it. Worried about wen it officially cones 9ut an starting secondary school. My parents don't think kids shud see him every night. We go after school for few hrs an have tea. They are always asked to go or not she sed they want to go as now getting attention they wanted. She sed to tell them we not goibg an see how he reacts.she not happy with my friend or his dad doing contact but she won't do it as he wants to kill him.

They worried about me wanting to move away to which my mum jumped an wat will do wen he hits an he will never forgive you for this. He has never ever hit me. Apparently he has controlled me our whole relationship he is still pulling the strings which is why I haven't walked awake as I can't stand on my own to feet without him because of how he has been with. All rubbish. I have got to go on a course about grooming they are all wanting me go come back an say yes he did do that to me actually.

Sw worker has sed the safety plan that has been in place last 7 months is working with fine. Then something got brought up about my friend who does contact an her daughter been there aswell. The social worker new about this fr9m the beginning new we went on day out with them always been to e but now it's not she is putting her at risks even tho she is supervising so none of kids ever left on own. If she continues wen her daughter is there she will have to have sw assigned .

So they have let me kids settle in a routine after a massive upevil to change it all all again. My husband is not even on bail as it as expired just waiting on a decision from the cps.

Usually tonight we did go see husband an have take away for tea with my friend an daughter. But that can't be done now neither can any days out. My kids have been in tears as I had to tell them we couldn't go coz social have changed there minds as if they are not going through enough xx

Maria

Member since
September 2018

286 posts

Posted Sun January 20, 2019 8:38amReport post

Oh that sounds awful, did you have anyone at the meeting who was there to solely support you. Its not really fair on the kids to change the access all the time. Your parents views are quite strong, isvthat through emotional response or genuine concern. Its awful when people take control of your life away and make you question who you are and how you have lived your life by saying you have been groomed. Go on the course, theres no harm in learning, engage with womens aid, even if thats only to show you take the suggestion seriously and to prove these things are not a part of your life. Onevthing ive learnt with social services is you cant always trust them, always have a witness at meetings and do your homework!.