Access to His Kids
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Hi Everyone,
I know all situations are different, I 'm just seeing if you have any insight!
My husband has 2 children from his previous marriage. They are 9. We had 50/50 custody at the time of the knock on June 14th. Police asked me to ring their mum to come and collect them as they didn't want the children to be present during the house search. One of the female officers went out and spoke to mum when she arrived, but I have no idea what was said. At no point were we made aware he wouldn't see his kids again, and that is the last we have seen of the kids.
They searched our house and took all my husband's devices (work laptop and mobile phone) and then left. He was briefly questioned about using KIK and if he had seen a certain image, but that was it.
We haven't been given anymore information. Social services have apparently spoken to the kids mum and the kids, but haven't spoken to my husband other than to say that it is up to the mum whether she lets him see the kids, but can't force anything. He hasn't been told by the police or social services that he's not allowed to see them, or any other children for that matter. He isn't on bail, and hasn't even been formerly questioned.
Is there anything we can do to try and see the kids. I have asked mum directly if I can see them, and she has also said no, to be expected. ( I've been in their lives for 7.5 years)
Anyone shed any light on why he can't see his kids if he hasn't even been questioned or charged? or is it just mum being deliberatly obtuse?
Thanks and apologies for ramble!
I know all situations are different, I 'm just seeing if you have any insight!
My husband has 2 children from his previous marriage. They are 9. We had 50/50 custody at the time of the knock on June 14th. Police asked me to ring their mum to come and collect them as they didn't want the children to be present during the house search. One of the female officers went out and spoke to mum when she arrived, but I have no idea what was said. At no point were we made aware he wouldn't see his kids again, and that is the last we have seen of the kids.
They searched our house and took all my husband's devices (work laptop and mobile phone) and then left. He was briefly questioned about using KIK and if he had seen a certain image, but that was it.
We haven't been given anymore information. Social services have apparently spoken to the kids mum and the kids, but haven't spoken to my husband other than to say that it is up to the mum whether she lets him see the kids, but can't force anything. He hasn't been told by the police or social services that he's not allowed to see them, or any other children for that matter. He isn't on bail, and hasn't even been formerly questioned.
Is there anything we can do to try and see the kids. I have asked mum directly if I can see them, and she has also said no, to be expected. ( I've been in their lives for 7.5 years)
Anyone shed any light on why he can't see his kids if he hasn't even been questioned or charged? or is it just mum being deliberatly obtuse?
Thanks and apologies for ramble!
Hi Lee,
Mother hates both of us. We had one hell of a fight in court to be granted 50/50 (and still have to pay CMS.
Hugs greatly received!
Mother hates both of us. We had one hell of a fight in court to be granted 50/50 (and still have to pay CMS.
Hugs greatly received!
We are in a similar situation and you can follow my experience on the legal process forum post 'family court advice'.
One thing that needs to be addressed before pursuing family courts is to know where your partner stands with the police. If there is any ongoing investigation that will hinder any visitation fight. My partner sought supervised visitation at a contact centre while under investigation. His ex wife is totally against him ever seeing his two young kids and has made it very difficult. Even tho what he is asking for is the 'safest' option the family courts were reluctant to give him the supervised visitation because he had not been sentenced yet to confirm how much of a threat he was/is.
Now that he has a sentence he is back with the courts who are taking ages to decide how to make a decision on his request. He hasn't seen his kids since the knock over three years!
One thing that needs to be addressed before pursuing family courts is to know where your partner stands with the police. If there is any ongoing investigation that will hinder any visitation fight. My partner sought supervised visitation at a contact centre while under investigation. His ex wife is totally against him ever seeing his two young kids and has made it very difficult. Even tho what he is asking for is the 'safest' option the family courts were reluctant to give him the supervised visitation because he had not been sentenced yet to confirm how much of a threat he was/is.
Now that he has a sentence he is back with the courts who are taking ages to decide how to make a decision on his request. He hasn't seen his kids since the knock over three years!
Hi
in my experiance I would guess that Social Care have advised the kids Mum that she should stop contact in order to show she is a protective factor
in my experiance I would guess that Social Care have advised the kids Mum that she should stop contact in order to show she is a protective factor
SS differ across the board. They are aware my partner is trying to have visitation rights and have not reopened the case because of it. Cafcass are in a way in support of my partner seeing his kids because they have a right to know their parents, as long as my partner can convince the judge he is not a threat to them.
Either way a discussion with the mother is best because maybe she will be ok with initial supervised visitation at a contact centre and go from there.
Either way a discussion with the mother is best because maybe she will be ok with initial supervised visitation at a contact centre and go from there.
Update
Well today we received a C100 application and Specific Issues Order from the Children's mother requesting no further contact between my husband and the children, and to re-locate to another part of the UK. Not to mention its full of lies/embellishments, but thats typical of her
We have spoken to our case worker at SS, and she has told their mother several times that supervised contact with the father is fine, but she will not allow this, and has now stopped phone calls. Our case worker has said that she will write in the CAFCASS report that she would recommend contact with the father, supervised for now.
My husband still has yet to be interviewed or cautioned over a single image he downloaded in a torrent that he believed just contained adult porn! I know it's an offence, and we have to protect vulnerable children out there that are suffering, but surely the police can see this by now, they've had his phone since the end of May.
I've contacted a family law solicitor this morning so I'm just waiting to hear back.
Well today we received a C100 application and Specific Issues Order from the Children's mother requesting no further contact between my husband and the children, and to re-locate to another part of the UK. Not to mention its full of lies/embellishments, but thats typical of her
We have spoken to our case worker at SS, and she has told their mother several times that supervised contact with the father is fine, but she will not allow this, and has now stopped phone calls. Our case worker has said that she will write in the CAFCASS report that she would recommend contact with the father, supervised for now.
My husband still has yet to be interviewed or cautioned over a single image he downloaded in a torrent that he believed just contained adult porn! I know it's an offence, and we have to protect vulnerable children out there that are suffering, but surely the police can see this by now, they've had his phone since the end of May.
I've contacted a family law solicitor this morning so I'm just waiting to hear back.
Can I just say, as a mother on the other side of the fence. Social services will have told her that she can let him see them but if it turns out he's guilty of XY or Z they can and will say she isn't acting protectively. Children's services will know exactly what they have on him and will act on a basis of beyond reasonable doubt. The police don't get Involved with child arrangements because social services have a higher authority.
I don't know if you have children. But it is horrifying and frightening to hear anything like this about your child's father. Our case is much more serious than yours sounds, but the shock and fear is bound to be the same. There is also no support on this side. All children's services are interested in is wether or not dad is seeing the children, as long as he isn't, there is no role for them to play as soon as they've established the children themselves have not been abused.
I don't know if you have children. But it is horrifying and frightening to hear anything like this about your child's father. Our case is much more serious than yours sounds, but the shock and fear is bound to be the same. There is also no support on this side. All children's services are interested in is wether or not dad is seeing the children, as long as he isn't, there is no role for them to play as soon as they've established the children themselves have not been abused.
update again....
CAFCASS have done their report after interviewing both my husband and his ex-wife.
SS and CAFCASS have both said that he poses no risk to the children and he should be allowed supervised visits as there has still been no further information from the police, despite them pushing for this.
Ex wife has told CAFCASS that my husband has not asked for access to his children, which he has done many many times, and he's even been denied phonecalls, even on his birthday last week.
Husabnds ex-wife has told CAFCASS a number of lies, and I know it is he said/she said at this point, but when they are so blatant and possibly damaging its hard to comprehend. One of the things she said was that she found images of children on his laptop in 2012 (they were still married then) and reported this to the poilce in 2014. The police have no record of this, and given we've already been to court twice (one for a PSO to stop her moving to Scotland, and one for a CAO for 50/50 access which we got) this was not raised at either court appearance, but now all of a sudden she has told SS this?
We are hopefull that on our next court date the judge will order an interim ruling that he is allowed to see his children, albeit supervised, until there is an outcome.
I know, as I've said previously, all children need to be safeguarded, but when this is purely over ONE SINGLE IMAGE, they even told us this, why are the police taking so long in thier investigation. It is having such a detrimental effect on everyone.
It's been 19 weeks since we have been able to contact the children.
CAFCASS have done their report after interviewing both my husband and his ex-wife.
SS and CAFCASS have both said that he poses no risk to the children and he should be allowed supervised visits as there has still been no further information from the police, despite them pushing for this.
Ex wife has told CAFCASS that my husband has not asked for access to his children, which he has done many many times, and he's even been denied phonecalls, even on his birthday last week.
Husabnds ex-wife has told CAFCASS a number of lies, and I know it is he said/she said at this point, but when they are so blatant and possibly damaging its hard to comprehend. One of the things she said was that she found images of children on his laptop in 2012 (they were still married then) and reported this to the poilce in 2014. The police have no record of this, and given we've already been to court twice (one for a PSO to stop her moving to Scotland, and one for a CAO for 50/50 access which we got) this was not raised at either court appearance, but now all of a sudden she has told SS this?
We are hopefull that on our next court date the judge will order an interim ruling that he is allowed to see his children, albeit supervised, until there is an outcome.
I know, as I've said previously, all children need to be safeguarded, but when this is purely over ONE SINGLE IMAGE, they even told us this, why are the police taking so long in thier investigation. It is having such a detrimental effect on everyone.
It's been 19 weeks since we have been able to contact the children.
It is good to see there is some progress. Ofc each case is different. My partner had asked for contact with his kids whilst awaiting the charges. In his case it could not be granted until he was sentenced which was last year.
But it is good that CAFCASS and SS have written their opinion. My partner's ex gave a statement which didn't have lies but basically said the kids don't miss him and didn't see the benefit of him in their lives, which hurt ofc.
Wishing you and your partner luck with the family court case
But it is good that CAFCASS and SS have written their opinion. My partner's ex gave a statement which didn't have lies but basically said the kids don't miss him and didn't see the benefit of him in their lives, which hurt ofc.
Wishing you and your partner luck with the family court case
UPDATE AGAIN
So, my husband got to see his kids last week, in a coffee shop, while his ex sat across the room at another table. All went well and kids genuinely happy to see him. ExWife agreed to further contact. Result 1
Husband just received phone call from our social worker to say they have closed the case. Result 2
We have court on Friday regarding the application from the ex to re-locaate with the kids to another part of England. Its a closed hearing so no one will be present. I am hopefull that the judge will order regular and continued access.
One image accidentally downloaded can cause such a devastating affect!!
So, my husband got to see his kids last week, in a coffee shop, while his ex sat across the room at another table. All went well and kids genuinely happy to see him. ExWife agreed to further contact. Result 1
Husband just received phone call from our social worker to say they have closed the case. Result 2
We have court on Friday regarding the application from the ex to re-locaate with the kids to another part of England. Its a closed hearing so no one will be present. I am hopefull that the judge will order regular and continued access.
One image accidentally downloaded can cause such a devastating affect!!