Is there life after this?
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Hi everyone some of you may of read my story a little while back.
Partner is accused of viewing iioc on a shared computer. He cannot prove his innocence. Police knocked in june. World fell apart. Relationship is in tatters. The allege offence happened 4 years ago. He got with me just over a year ago but lay low from the police for all this time. They finally caught up with him but no arrest was made. He was charged last week and he's awaiting hiscourt date.
This roller-coaster of a ride I'd do anything to get off isnt coming to an end any time soon. We've argued, cried, iv been struggling to come to terms with the shock since. Whilst the anxst of the up and coming court date is building I'm struggling to not worry about the media finding out.
My question here is, has anyone come out of this with not many people finding out if anyone? I know that's the ideal outcome we would all love or am I just kidding myself?
I genuinely don't know how life carries on after such an allogation.
The register.
Iv even read going on holiday can be difficult as well as getting home insurance. Basic simple things we do in life become much harder. Sorry to sound like a negative person here, I guess I'm looking to see if anyone has come out of the other side of this and things are okay. I'm scared my life will be the brunt of this accusation and people will think I'm associated with it.
My Partner has told me answers to my questions and it's a horrendous situation hes found himself in. I just don't know how life carries on as a couple with this hanging over us.
Send love and strength to you all and any thoughts and replies would be amazing as I have literally no one else I cam talk to x
Partner is accused of viewing iioc on a shared computer. He cannot prove his innocence. Police knocked in june. World fell apart. Relationship is in tatters. The allege offence happened 4 years ago. He got with me just over a year ago but lay low from the police for all this time. They finally caught up with him but no arrest was made. He was charged last week and he's awaiting hiscourt date.
This roller-coaster of a ride I'd do anything to get off isnt coming to an end any time soon. We've argued, cried, iv been struggling to come to terms with the shock since. Whilst the anxst of the up and coming court date is building I'm struggling to not worry about the media finding out.
My question here is, has anyone come out of this with not many people finding out if anyone? I know that's the ideal outcome we would all love or am I just kidding myself?
I genuinely don't know how life carries on after such an allogation.
The register.
Iv even read going on holiday can be difficult as well as getting home insurance. Basic simple things we do in life become much harder. Sorry to sound like a negative person here, I guess I'm looking to see if anyone has come out of the other side of this and things are okay. I'm scared my life will be the brunt of this accusation and people will think I'm associated with it.
My Partner has told me answers to my questions and it's a horrendous situation hes found himself in. I just don't know how life carries on as a couple with this hanging over us.
Send love and strength to you all and any thoughts and replies would be amazing as I have literally no one else I cam talk to x
Hi Yazz
so sorry to hear that your in the club none of us want to be in.
my situation is a little different because it's my son who is the offender which arose from a communication offence.
ive read of ladies on here where nothing has been reported in the press. It's all down to what cases are going on in the court that day and whether their paper is full on that day. In our case we were unlucky. My sons case made the local paper but thankfully not the national paper. It's honestly a hit and miss whether it gets reported or not.
As for being on the register, yes some things can change. Holidays are relatively easy as long as your not on probation or parole. If your going abroad your partner would be stopped and asked where he's travelling to, where he is staying and when he will return. He will be stopped going and coming back. I'm told it's a good idea for the offender to go last so not to have the whole party stoppedtogether.
house and car insurance does for some weird reason go up. I suppose the insurance company may worry that your car or house may be targeted so they lump on a premium to cover it should the worst happen. That said, there are ladies on here who have found companies that don't lump up the price so hopefully one of those ladies will give a bit more info by posing a reply.
sorry I can't be of more help x
so sorry to hear that your in the club none of us want to be in.
my situation is a little different because it's my son who is the offender which arose from a communication offence.
ive read of ladies on here where nothing has been reported in the press. It's all down to what cases are going on in the court that day and whether their paper is full on that day. In our case we were unlucky. My sons case made the local paper but thankfully not the national paper. It's honestly a hit and miss whether it gets reported or not.
As for being on the register, yes some things can change. Holidays are relatively easy as long as your not on probation or parole. If your going abroad your partner would be stopped and asked where he's travelling to, where he is staying and when he will return. He will be stopped going and coming back. I'm told it's a good idea for the offender to go last so not to have the whole party stoppedtogether.
house and car insurance does for some weird reason go up. I suppose the insurance company may worry that your car or house may be targeted so they lump on a premium to cover it should the worst happen. That said, there are ladies on here who have found companies that don't lump up the price so hopefully one of those ladies will give a bit more info by posing a reply.
sorry I can't be of more help x
Hi
Please encourage your partner to seek legal advice, the police have to prove he's guilty beyond a reasonable doubt.
Have i read previously that this was on a shared work computer?
A couple of thoughts, surely the police would have to prove that he was in work and the only person to have had access to the computer. I'd want a forensic analysis of the computer which should be able to show dates and times. Even if it was on his username, what was the culture there? Was the computer left open for anyone to use, or did other people know his password?
Re home insurance, ours stayed pretty much the same price, but there's now a £2500 excess for malicious damage to the house, we went through a broker called home protect, ended up with the same insurer as the year before.
We haven't been abroad, but there are countries that people on the register can not travel to, and I've read that they cant use egates.
We're a year post sentence, and I'm angrier now than I've ever been, it affects everything and I don't know if we're going to make it, to be honest. I never thought I would hate him, but I can't stand for him to even touch me, I look at him and it's like looking at a stranger, he's smashed our lives to pieces, and at the moment it feels like everything is getting worse not better. I hate that I'm so self pitying.
Sorry I cannot be more positive about the future, hopefully things will be more positive for you.
Joe
Please encourage your partner to seek legal advice, the police have to prove he's guilty beyond a reasonable doubt.
Have i read previously that this was on a shared work computer?
A couple of thoughts, surely the police would have to prove that he was in work and the only person to have had access to the computer. I'd want a forensic analysis of the computer which should be able to show dates and times. Even if it was on his username, what was the culture there? Was the computer left open for anyone to use, or did other people know his password?
Re home insurance, ours stayed pretty much the same price, but there's now a £2500 excess for malicious damage to the house, we went through a broker called home protect, ended up with the same insurer as the year before.
We haven't been abroad, but there are countries that people on the register can not travel to, and I've read that they cant use egates.
We're a year post sentence, and I'm angrier now than I've ever been, it affects everything and I don't know if we're going to make it, to be honest. I never thought I would hate him, but I can't stand for him to even touch me, I look at him and it's like looking at a stranger, he's smashed our lives to pieces, and at the moment it feels like everything is getting worse not better. I hate that I'm so self pitying.
Sorry I cannot be more positive about the future, hopefully things will be more positive for you.
Joe
Hi nicenana and Joe
Thank you both for reading and replying it means a lot and it's been helpful to hear about holidays and insurances. I hope you are both safe and well and finding strength daily to go on with this turmoil.we find ourselves in.
In regards to my partners case yes it was on a works computer. I don't wish to go into too much detail on here but believe me every avenue has been explored. He's been set up royally. That's what I have been told.
I hear what you say about being touched. Whilst I'm trying to believe what he is saying to me sometimes I find myself feeling like I can't have him anywhere near me. Then I feel guilty in case he is telling me the whole truth. I won't even let him stay in the house. He's asked and hinted can he (we don't have children together) but I'm not ready. I still feel so broken and highly embarrassed the police came to my door.
As for the future I'm just taking it day by day. Not like I can do much at the minute anyway with covid.im just taking care of myself the best I can, getting through the day, accepting there will be days of dispair and disbelief when it all comes flooding back and days where I might forget about it for a little while.
Thanks again for both replies. It helps to hear how your handling it, your feelings and your buts of knowledge about the subject because I'm still learning daily about it all. We are warriors for going through this I swear x
Thank you both for reading and replying it means a lot and it's been helpful to hear about holidays and insurances. I hope you are both safe and well and finding strength daily to go on with this turmoil.we find ourselves in.
In regards to my partners case yes it was on a works computer. I don't wish to go into too much detail on here but believe me every avenue has been explored. He's been set up royally. That's what I have been told.
I hear what you say about being touched. Whilst I'm trying to believe what he is saying to me sometimes I find myself feeling like I can't have him anywhere near me. Then I feel guilty in case he is telling me the whole truth. I won't even let him stay in the house. He's asked and hinted can he (we don't have children together) but I'm not ready. I still feel so broken and highly embarrassed the police came to my door.
As for the future I'm just taking it day by day. Not like I can do much at the minute anyway with covid.im just taking care of myself the best I can, getting through the day, accepting there will be days of dispair and disbelief when it all comes flooding back and days where I might forget about it for a little while.
Thanks again for both replies. It helps to hear how your handling it, your feelings and your buts of knowledge about the subject because I'm still learning daily about it all. We are warriors for going through this I swear x
Hi Yazznan
This is definitely a question I ask myself often the answer is always yes there is a life after this but... what kind of life that's the difference is it going to be the same life definitely not! Is it going to be better? Is it going to be worse? Who knows maybe life is meant to take us down this path we could be better people or I know I have found things about myself which I wouldn't have discovered.
maybe we will need to move because of all of this and that could be better or worse for all sorts of reasons. One thing is I have to carry on I have kids but whether I stay or go from supporting their dad is still undecided but I don't think we will know what life will be like until we get there. All I know is this isn't the life I planned either way for me and the kids and I've got to get over that fact
sending huge hugs x
This is definitely a question I ask myself often the answer is always yes there is a life after this but... what kind of life that's the difference is it going to be the same life definitely not! Is it going to be better? Is it going to be worse? Who knows maybe life is meant to take us down this path we could be better people or I know I have found things about myself which I wouldn't have discovered.
maybe we will need to move because of all of this and that could be better or worse for all sorts of reasons. One thing is I have to carry on I have kids but whether I stay or go from supporting their dad is still undecided but I don't think we will know what life will be like until we get there. All I know is this isn't the life I planned either way for me and the kids and I've got to get over that fact
sending huge hugs x
Hi summer
Thank you for reading and replying. I totally hear what your saying about it not being the life you've planned. I guess somethings are sent to try us and what ever this is, we will come out the other side. We have to. Your being strong for your babies and I take my hat off to you. It doesn't look like I will have children in this life. Maybe this was a blessing. I don't think I could of coped. You have real strength. Its a punishment in itself all of this and we didn't even do anything. That's the hardest part. I just don't know how there will be a life after this. I'm terrified of the astigmatism of knowing/being with the accused, I don't even know how I'd get through people gossiping about him, about me. If necessary I will tell my story when I'm ready, this happened a long time before we met, that's the only bonus in this those that may read it will see it was a historical crime. I guess I'm feeling anxious and playing out potential scenarios which may never happen. Today has been an emotional day. We've spent a little time together then I asked him to go. I have a second of normality doing something simple like sitting on the sofa having tea feeling cosy then a few seconds later this new me iv become realises that short lived feeling of once before needs to fade away into this new sad anxious being. Xx
Thank you for reading and replying. I totally hear what your saying about it not being the life you've planned. I guess somethings are sent to try us and what ever this is, we will come out the other side. We have to. Your being strong for your babies and I take my hat off to you. It doesn't look like I will have children in this life. Maybe this was a blessing. I don't think I could of coped. You have real strength. Its a punishment in itself all of this and we didn't even do anything. That's the hardest part. I just don't know how there will be a life after this. I'm terrified of the astigmatism of knowing/being with the accused, I don't even know how I'd get through people gossiping about him, about me. If necessary I will tell my story when I'm ready, this happened a long time before we met, that's the only bonus in this those that may read it will see it was a historical crime. I guess I'm feeling anxious and playing out potential scenarios which may never happen. Today has been an emotional day. We've spent a little time together then I asked him to go. I have a second of normality doing something simple like sitting on the sofa having tea feeling cosy then a few seconds later this new me iv become realises that short lived feeling of once before needs to fade away into this new sad anxious being. Xx
Awww Yazan,
I had to respond to your message. Its all just so so sad. I'm personally finding the more time I spend with my husband.. Over the past few months the pain and memory of the offence is getting a little number.
It's totally your decision whether you stay with him or not. Your situation is different as you don't yet have children and you have a decision as to whether you move on and meet someone else and maybe you could?
However... Please give yourself permission to be in the moment and enjoy some time together. I think we hold a tremendous amount of guilt at this being our horrid secret too as it's the worry of the association. This offence needs to be understood by society. Its not going away... Sadly...the arrests rates are going up. Society cannot continue to treat these men as contact offenders and write them off. They need understanding and rehabilitation within the community.
The shock of this happenening creates such a high level of anxiety and we catastrophise every aspect of it. A lot of these cases are not getting reported and so not every case becomes public knowledge. I like you have spent months being terrified of the media and the judgement. I am trying to accept that this may not happen and if it does we will deal with it however that may be.. We cannot spend every single day in an anxious state about the future as it hasn't happened yet. We only have today.
Tske care, we are all pretty bloody amazing xxxx
I had to respond to your message. Its all just so so sad. I'm personally finding the more time I spend with my husband.. Over the past few months the pain and memory of the offence is getting a little number.
It's totally your decision whether you stay with him or not. Your situation is different as you don't yet have children and you have a decision as to whether you move on and meet someone else and maybe you could?
However... Please give yourself permission to be in the moment and enjoy some time together. I think we hold a tremendous amount of guilt at this being our horrid secret too as it's the worry of the association. This offence needs to be understood by society. Its not going away... Sadly...the arrests rates are going up. Society cannot continue to treat these men as contact offenders and write them off. They need understanding and rehabilitation within the community.
The shock of this happenening creates such a high level of anxiety and we catastrophise every aspect of it. A lot of these cases are not getting reported and so not every case becomes public knowledge. I like you have spent months being terrified of the media and the judgement. I am trying to accept that this may not happen and if it does we will deal with it however that may be.. We cannot spend every single day in an anxious state about the future as it hasn't happened yet. We only have today.
Tske care, we are all pretty bloody amazing xxxx
Hi rainbow
Thank you for your kind message and feeling the need to reach out.
I hear what you say in I have the chance to meet someone else. Truth is I don't think I even could trust anyone after this ever again. Staying together seems like it's getting even harder go contemplate now. He's unemployed. Really struggling for money and relying on benefits. I worry he's not going to be financially stable (when iv been sucessful) and I'm now worrying about his financial state ontop of all of what's going on. This relationship was amazing until June, ever since its been hurdles of emotions, suicide threats, talk of financial woe amongst my own shock and grief iv incurred. I feel tremendously guilty for contemplating walking away because he is literally rock bottom but I don't know how else I can support him. And I need to put myself first too. This is not my weight to carry but I feel every day its getting a lite heavier.
For now it's back to work and get through the working day. I find solice being alone at weekends in the peace.
How are things with you? What stage are you at now?
He was charged last week and awaiting court date x
Thank you for your kind message and feeling the need to reach out.
I hear what you say in I have the chance to meet someone else. Truth is I don't think I even could trust anyone after this ever again. Staying together seems like it's getting even harder go contemplate now. He's unemployed. Really struggling for money and relying on benefits. I worry he's not going to be financially stable (when iv been sucessful) and I'm now worrying about his financial state ontop of all of what's going on. This relationship was amazing until June, ever since its been hurdles of emotions, suicide threats, talk of financial woe amongst my own shock and grief iv incurred. I feel tremendously guilty for contemplating walking away because he is literally rock bottom but I don't know how else I can support him. And I need to put myself first too. This is not my weight to carry but I feel every day its getting a lite heavier.
For now it's back to work and get through the working day. I find solice being alone at weekends in the peace.
How are things with you? What stage are you at now?
He was charged last week and awaiting court date x
Awww Yaznann
It sounds like things are very tough for you right now my love.
Is he not living with you? I wish my husband was but actually I think the gradual transition into spending every day together... Has helped me with getting my head around everything. The restrictions are because of the children which are very tough but actually do give time and a little more structure.
You sound like you need to get your own support and he does too. Are you both speaking to the helpline regularly? Are you thinking of doing the inform courses? We are.
Give yourself time. The shock I feel I won't ever fully get over but it gets a little number over time.
We are still waiting for the second interview. End of bail was extended twice til mid November now. No disclosure as yet. Its all such a waiting game..
Take care and look after yourself xxxx
It sounds like things are very tough for you right now my love.
Is he not living with you? I wish my husband was but actually I think the gradual transition into spending every day together... Has helped me with getting my head around everything. The restrictions are because of the children which are very tough but actually do give time and a little more structure.
You sound like you need to get your own support and he does too. Are you both speaking to the helpline regularly? Are you thinking of doing the inform courses? We are.
Give yourself time. The shock I feel I won't ever fully get over but it gets a little number over time.
We are still waiting for the second interview. End of bail was extended twice til mid November now. No disclosure as yet. Its all such a waiting game..
Take care and look after yourself xxxx
Hi rainbow80
How are you? No we are not living together thankfully. We both have our own houses. Since the knock I sent him packing (during lockdown we stayed together.)
I haven't phoned the helpline in a while maybe I should reach out it might help.
Sorry to hear its been extended. This happened to my partner. By 28 days. He was then told a further week wait after that. Then he was charged last week but not arrested!? The waiting is unbearable. I honestly wish he'd robbed a bank I think I could accept that far easier that all this.
Court will be January for the plea then I'm not sure how long after that till sentencing. Hope your children and you are coping the best you can. I can't imagine how difficult it is for you. Have you confided in anyone? I haven't been able to as all my friends have children and I don't think I could say it out loud if I'm honest.
Just wish I knew the right thing to do.
Sorry iv just poured out.
Big hugs
Yaz x
How are you? No we are not living together thankfully. We both have our own houses. Since the knock I sent him packing (during lockdown we stayed together.)
I haven't phoned the helpline in a while maybe I should reach out it might help.
Sorry to hear its been extended. This happened to my partner. By 28 days. He was then told a further week wait after that. Then he was charged last week but not arrested!? The waiting is unbearable. I honestly wish he'd robbed a bank I think I could accept that far easier that all this.
Court will be January for the plea then I'm not sure how long after that till sentencing. Hope your children and you are coping the best you can. I can't imagine how difficult it is for you. Have you confided in anyone? I haven't been able to as all my friends have children and I don't think I could say it out loud if I'm honest.
Just wish I knew the right thing to do.
Sorry iv just poured out.
Big hugs
Yaz x
Hi Yazz
Just saw this n your other message. Aww I am sorry to hear you're struggling so much tonight. It really is one of the hardest things to deal with. I described to my counsellor that when it happened I felt like I had brick walls all around me and couldn't see any way out at all. As time has gone on.... I am starting to knock down some of those walls n find some paths out.... Its still very tough though.
As for who knows... In my life... My inlaws and the whole of my family. 4 sisters, grown up nieces, nephew, their partners oh n 1 friend who is a Counsellor. In some ways its made it harder so many knowing but also I do not think I could have gotten through those early days without my family.
Do any of your family know? What shout his? Please think about confiding or you will explode one day!!
Trust your instincts n the best advice I was ever given by counsellors I called... A lot... Was to take a day at a time n lots n lots of self care. Sleep meditation and hypnosis apps help to stop my mind racing n helped me get some sleep in the end without sleeping tablets I was on for the first couple of months. I am also on anti depressants which do help. We have to do all we can to get through this.
Take care and keep talking and posting xxxx
Just saw this n your other message. Aww I am sorry to hear you're struggling so much tonight. It really is one of the hardest things to deal with. I described to my counsellor that when it happened I felt like I had brick walls all around me and couldn't see any way out at all. As time has gone on.... I am starting to knock down some of those walls n find some paths out.... Its still very tough though.
As for who knows... In my life... My inlaws and the whole of my family. 4 sisters, grown up nieces, nephew, their partners oh n 1 friend who is a Counsellor. In some ways its made it harder so many knowing but also I do not think I could have gotten through those early days without my family.
Do any of your family know? What shout his? Please think about confiding or you will explode one day!!
Trust your instincts n the best advice I was ever given by counsellors I called... A lot... Was to take a day at a time n lots n lots of self care. Sleep meditation and hypnosis apps help to stop my mind racing n helped me get some sleep in the end without sleeping tablets I was on for the first couple of months. I am also on anti depressants which do help. We have to do all we can to get through this.
Take care and keep talking and posting xxxx
Hi rainbow
You've really helped me these last couple of days for reading and responding to my posts so from the bottom of my heart thank you so much.
Have you found the councilling beneficial? I too am exploring doing this. I feel like I need to talk to someone.
He hasn't told anyone of his family. He's very against this idea even though it might be in the news very soon he's not prepared to tell them. I wish I had their ignorance right now that certainly would be bliss. His ex partner knows as they share a young daughter and ss are involved. He's not allowed to have custody unsupervised. Which puts pressure on me to organise things and be available to supervise.
In regards to talking to someone, I haven't told any of my friends they all have kids and I'd be devastated if they changed their opinions on me and I'm not strong enough to face that to be honest. They know somethings wrong as I'm no longer the happy go lucky soul I once was. Iv told my mum but we don't have the best relationship and she doesn't really get it so I just feel like a Councillor and talking on here is my best option.
Your right in what you say about the walls closing in. I feel that wholeheartedly. I'm glad you have support around you.
Thank you for responding on the court plea post I added. I wasnt sure and wanted to guage how that may work.
Again thank you for keeping in touch. It really has helped me to feel a little brighter.
Hope you are safe and well and have a lovely weekend.
Yaz x
You've really helped me these last couple of days for reading and responding to my posts so from the bottom of my heart thank you so much.
Have you found the councilling beneficial? I too am exploring doing this. I feel like I need to talk to someone.
He hasn't told anyone of his family. He's very against this idea even though it might be in the news very soon he's not prepared to tell them. I wish I had their ignorance right now that certainly would be bliss. His ex partner knows as they share a young daughter and ss are involved. He's not allowed to have custody unsupervised. Which puts pressure on me to organise things and be available to supervise.
In regards to talking to someone, I haven't told any of my friends they all have kids and I'd be devastated if they changed their opinions on me and I'm not strong enough to face that to be honest. They know somethings wrong as I'm no longer the happy go lucky soul I once was. Iv told my mum but we don't have the best relationship and she doesn't really get it so I just feel like a Councillor and talking on here is my best option.
Your right in what you say about the walls closing in. I feel that wholeheartedly. I'm glad you have support around you.
Thank you for responding on the court plea post I added. I wasnt sure and wanted to guage how that may work.
Again thank you for keeping in touch. It really has helped me to feel a little brighter.
Hope you are safe and well and have a lovely weekend.
Yaz x
Wow Yazz
You're coping so much better than you think... Seeing as you're not really able to talk to anyone around you! My god in those early days... I had my sisters, niece n brother in law rallying around after me n I was calling a 24 hour counselling helpline through work every day n was still in a state of panic!
Have you thought about samaritins? Have you asked your gp for a referral? It's so tough when it comes to gelling friends as you never know how people will take it. Our really good friends still don't know. Made up some cock n bull story n they are very upset for us. Hubby is not ready for his lifelong friend to know yet.
Think about joining the stop so forum too. You have to be approved so it's a little more private but you can share email addresses and it's a little busier I would say.
I'm glad I'm helping you. You're helping me too. The whole thing is an absolute roller-coaster of emotions. Please call the helpline regularly too. They understand the offence better than any counsellor could n have helped me to get my head a little straighter so so many times. Sadly they speak to hundreds of men like our partners n women like us so they understand this from every side. They are very reassuring. Xxx
You're coping so much better than you think... Seeing as you're not really able to talk to anyone around you! My god in those early days... I had my sisters, niece n brother in law rallying around after me n I was calling a 24 hour counselling helpline through work every day n was still in a state of panic!
Have you thought about samaritins? Have you asked your gp for a referral? It's so tough when it comes to gelling friends as you never know how people will take it. Our really good friends still don't know. Made up some cock n bull story n they are very upset for us. Hubby is not ready for his lifelong friend to know yet.
Think about joining the stop so forum too. You have to be approved so it's a little more private but you can share email addresses and it's a little busier I would say.
I'm glad I'm helping you. You're helping me too. The whole thing is an absolute roller-coaster of emotions. Please call the helpline regularly too. They understand the offence better than any counsellor could n have helped me to get my head a little straighter so so many times. Sadly they speak to hundreds of men like our partners n women like us so they understand this from every side. They are very reassuring. Xxx
Hi everyone
sorry to hijack this post but I can't work out how to create a post of my own. I'm very bad with technology!
i was wondering if anyone can advise on how long assessments take. Here is the back story. Son arrested for communication and sent to prison. Son is coming hone in November . Sister has a four year old son. We know our son will have to be assessed before he can see the little one but we are wondering how long the assessment takes for the offender to see his nephew. We are in Scotland. Any advice would be appreciated x
sorry to hijack this post but I can't work out how to create a post of my own. I'm very bad with technology!
i was wondering if anyone can advise on how long assessments take. Here is the back story. Son arrested for communication and sent to prison. Son is coming hone in November . Sister has a four year old son. We know our son will have to be assessed before he can see the little one but we are wondering how long the assessment takes for the offender to see his nephew. We are in Scotland. Any advice would be appreciated x
Hi rainbow
Thank you for your reply. I haven't called the samaritans it hadn't occurred to me I could. As for my go that sounds like a good idea too.
I took your advise today and allowed myself to enjoy the moment I was in. I needed it, we needed it and I feel a little brighter for it. We took his daughter out for a few hours and it was nice and like normal.
I guess I am staying a little sane. I think going to work is keeping me going. I will ring the helpline one day next week too.
I hope your doing well and have had a nice weekend.
Love Yaz. X
Thank you for your reply. I haven't called the samaritans it hadn't occurred to me I could. As for my go that sounds like a good idea too.
I took your advise today and allowed myself to enjoy the moment I was in. I needed it, we needed it and I feel a little brighter for it. We took his daughter out for a few hours and it was nice and like normal.
I guess I am staying a little sane. I think going to work is keeping me going. I will ring the helpline one day next week too.
I hope your doing well and have had a nice weekend.
Love Yaz. X