Never received the knock
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This is an extremely difficult post for me.
I found the pictures/videos when I was a child. About 18 years ago, then again about 15 years ago. I was still a minor, but I knew the impact it would have on our family because of a teacher that was caught and the impact of his wife that was also a teacher in my school. I kept it secret at first and told my mum when I was able to comprehend it a bit more. I don't think that she really believed it until a few years later when I found some torrent links that were years old. (No files).
There was a massive discussion and it said that it would stop. My mum and sister were afraid that he would kill himself. After this, I sort of put it to the back of my mind. Then I found some legal but indecent video links on YouTube and I felt betrayed again. I never really trusted him again.
Fast forward about 10 years and I feel torn. My sister had a baby and all the feeling came back. I am petrified but my sister's don't see the threat. They said if something would do happen if would have happened to us.
I just can't forgive or move on like my sisters can. I don't want to see the family member again truthfully, and everyone want me to. I still cry often and cried today. I think I need therapy but it's difficult because there was no knock, no conviction. I doubt anything could even be found because it was that long ago, and not even in this country that I found the files.
Any advice would be great.
I found the pictures/videos when I was a child. About 18 years ago, then again about 15 years ago. I was still a minor, but I knew the impact it would have on our family because of a teacher that was caught and the impact of his wife that was also a teacher in my school. I kept it secret at first and told my mum when I was able to comprehend it a bit more. I don't think that she really believed it until a few years later when I found some torrent links that were years old. (No files).
There was a massive discussion and it said that it would stop. My mum and sister were afraid that he would kill himself. After this, I sort of put it to the back of my mind. Then I found some legal but indecent video links on YouTube and I felt betrayed again. I never really trusted him again.
Fast forward about 10 years and I feel torn. My sister had a baby and all the feeling came back. I am petrified but my sister's don't see the threat. They said if something would do happen if would have happened to us.
I just can't forgive or move on like my sisters can. I don't want to see the family member again truthfully, and everyone want me to. I still cry often and cried today. I think I need therapy but it's difficult because there was no knock, no conviction. I doubt anything could even be found because it was that long ago, and not even in this country that I found the files.
Any advice would be great.
Hi HannahSmith, thank you for your post. I am pleased that you have discovered this forum and find it a safe space to air your experiences. I am very sorry to hear that you have been through such a terrible ordeal and continue to struggle with the effects of this.
I would like to echo the above post by Poster. I suggest you consider calling our helpline on 0808 1000 900. Our trained helpline operators can talk to you about your experiences anonymously and provide you with advice and support suited to your situation.
Lucy.
I would like to echo the above post by Poster. I suggest you consider calling our helpline on 0808 1000 900. Our trained helpline operators can talk to you about your experiences anonymously and provide you with advice and support suited to your situation.
Lucy.