Scared and unsure
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Can't believe I'm here and having the guts to type this. My cousin has been arrested for speaking with a child (under 13) online about 4 weeks ago and says he was sent a indecent image but when they told him how old they were he stopped talking. He said then someone else got into his chat and carried on the conversation and he said he didn't know the picture was saved to his device. I don't know if it's true or not. He's on bail but with conditions not to be around under 18,'s unsupervised.
I have 2 kids under 4 and I have said he can't see them unless supervised by me.
Haven't heard from police or social services yet but will they get in touch to tell us officially or even assess me and my kids? Will my kids be open to social services while we are waiting for court?? Hate hate hate the idea of being under social because of something my cousin has done. Haven't told anyone and really wish I could speak to my parents or a friend or two. If I don't tell my kids teachers or health visitors that my cousin has been arrested and I know about it is that bad even though I will be always supervising.my kids?? Feel guilty keeping a secret that isn't mine.
I have 2 kids under 4 and I have said he can't see them unless supervised by me.
Haven't heard from police or social services yet but will they get in touch to tell us officially or even assess me and my kids? Will my kids be open to social services while we are waiting for court?? Hate hate hate the idea of being under social because of something my cousin has done. Haven't told anyone and really wish I could speak to my parents or a friend or two. If I don't tell my kids teachers or health visitors that my cousin has been arrested and I know about it is that bad even though I will be always supervising.my kids?? Feel guilty keeping a secret that isn't mine.
So sorry to hear about the impact of your cousin's actions. Is your cousin really close to the kids? Like do they see him as an uncle and he is quite involved in their lives (previously pick up from school, has his own kids that okay with yours etc). I ask because I personally do not see why the school would need to know unless there are genuine welfare concerns for your little ones. Same for the health professionals. But please get advice from the Lucy faithful helpline. They are the professionals and know alot about different situations.
Many Offenders tend to lie alot, especially soon after being caught. You are right to be skeptical of the excuse someone else continued the convo. I believe there are resources online that can help draft up a family safety plan (maybe different wording). That can help manage your kids seeing your cousin if you are ok with it while waiting for social services.
I'm not sure if ss would get too involved. I think it depends on your dynamic. For example, my partner's best friend who is like a brother has a daughter. Police have spoken to the mum and she is aware and confirmed he will not be around her undersupervised.he also cannot stay over anywhere with kids in the house
It can take a long while from the knock to a sentence (av. Two years, but depends on location and work load). So I would suggest for now contacting Lucy faithful to get advice on how to handle your cousin, since it may be a while until any other support is available.
Big hugs!
Many Offenders tend to lie alot, especially soon after being caught. You are right to be skeptical of the excuse someone else continued the convo. I believe there are resources online that can help draft up a family safety plan (maybe different wording). That can help manage your kids seeing your cousin if you are ok with it while waiting for social services.
I'm not sure if ss would get too involved. I think it depends on your dynamic. For example, my partner's best friend who is like a brother has a daughter. Police have spoken to the mum and she is aware and confirmed he will not be around her undersupervised.he also cannot stay over anywhere with kids in the house
It can take a long while from the knock to a sentence (av. Two years, but depends on location and work load). So I would suggest for now contacting Lucy faithful to get advice on how to handle your cousin, since it may be a while until any other support is available.
Big hugs!
Thank u very much for taking the time to reply. We heard from children services now and gave us an agreement to stick to because of my cousin. Glad it's done and not opening us up on a plan so just have to see how long it goes on for n how long until or if my cousin goes 2 court. Thank you!