Who do you tell?
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My son (19) has been viewing images. We are at the start of the process. I haven't told anyone. I don't have any family apart from my birth Mum. I've always struggled to trust her as I was removed and that's probably my own fears rather than anything she has done. I am seeing her tomorrow and wonder should I tell her. I was not going to tell her about the images but that my son was abused and raped from the age of 7 for around 3 years we think. I can't talk about viewing images as that's all so new and it's hardly sunk in but he told me about the abuse a year ago. Does it help to tell someone? Will it take away a tiny bit of the agony? What do other people do?
Hey there,
It does help to tell someone but it helps if it is someone you trust.
I told my parents, then my best friend and my employer who have been the most supportive and a help because I think I would have gone stir crazy if I couldn't talk to someone.
If you don't know who you can talk to.....ringing the stop it now helpline is apparently really helpful
Sending love and stay strong xx
It does help to tell someone but it helps if it is someone you trust.
I told my parents, then my best friend and my employer who have been the most supportive and a help because I think I would have gone stir crazy if I couldn't talk to someone.
If you don't know who you can talk to.....ringing the stop it now helpline is apparently really helpful
Sending love and stay strong xx
Thanks Spider I don't know if it would help me or not. Or relationship has been tricky over the years but I'm working on improving it. Just feel like I'm going crazy not being able to tell anyone. We havent even told my eldest son, who I am very close to. But we know he won't react well, the abuser was his best friend so it's complicated (isn't it all). Just wish so much I had someone to trust that I could tell.
Telling somebody was crucial for me. Otherwise you feel like somebody locked you in a balloon, you scream and nobody can hear you :( We told parents only and my sister. Nobody else knows. Sending love xx
I didn't tell her. I couldn't. I was not going to tell her about the police and the images I was going to tell her my beautiful little boys childhood had been stolen through the abuse he substained and I just couldn't. It's horrible when you can't trust the woman who gave birth to you. I have no one to tell. I have no family. I feel like every time I open my mouth I am lying, acting and it is exhausting. But there is no choice I think. What does this say about my life that I have no one in it I trust enough to tell them I am living through this horrendous nightmare.
You have us Rebecca... You tell us what you need to you need to... We're here to listen (massive hugs) xx
Exactly what I was going to say you can vent to us.
Someone will always reply. As we have all been put in this odd boat together ? and not talking about it does get a little easier as time goes on.....I even met up with a friend the other day who didn't know which was odd.....so the media doesn't reach everyone!
But also ring the helpline even if it is just for a chat they may have answers that we do not xx
Keep strong xx
Someone will always reply. As we have all been put in this odd boat together ? and not talking about it does get a little easier as time goes on.....I even met up with a friend the other day who didn't know which was odd.....so the media doesn't reach everyone!
But also ring the helpline even if it is just for a chat they may have answers that we do not xx
Keep strong xx
The helpline are good, they actually talked me through a breathing exercise the first time I called them as I was in such a state I was hyperventilating. I couldn’t face telling my mum ( I told my dad first and asked him to tell her) It really helps to give words to this pain, gets it out of your head a bit ( if that makes sense?)
I decided to tell 2 close friends as I really didn’t know how to carry on like nothing had happened ( I say decided, but to be honest it was all a bit of a blur and I was in shock for about a month, I think I was just acting on instinct in the early days post knock) I was 5 months pregnant at the time and about to start my new life with the man I loved and trusted.
I was given 11 free counselling sessions with a Stop so therapist. It’s helped a lot, I’d definitely recommend it.
Sending you lots of love . X
I decided to tell 2 close friends as I really didn’t know how to carry on like nothing had happened ( I say decided, but to be honest it was all a bit of a blur and I was in shock for about a month, I think I was just acting on instinct in the early days post knock) I was 5 months pregnant at the time and about to start my new life with the man I loved and trusted.
I was given 11 free counselling sessions with a Stop so therapist. It’s helped a lot, I’d definitely recommend it.
Sending you lots of love . X
Thank you so so much everyone. Not sure what I'd do without you all. It's such a weird thing we are going through but it's so supportive being able to communicate with others who really get it.