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Really struggling

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Mata

Member since
May 2019

61 posts

Posted Wed October 28, 2020 7:35pmReport post

Hi,

Needed to come on here as i have no one else who i can ralk to and who understands what I am going through.

Husband's case is finally over and hes now under probation, hes also attending a SAA group every week and hes just got a sponsor. This is good for him and his steps to recovery.

My point is what about ME!! Im really struggling with my own thoughts and feelings and i have noone who i can talk to. I no i probably sound petty and jealous but i just feel that apart from the stopitnow helpline where else is there help for wives and partners.

I cant talk to my husband about how im feeling as he is the problem, he brought all this shit, and uproar to our door yet hes the one getting all the help.

Mata

Blackhound

Member since
October 2020

479 posts

Posted Wed October 28, 2020 7:39pmReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Sat August 24, 2024 10:38am

Mata

Member since
May 2019

61 posts

Posted Wed October 28, 2020 7:53pmReport post

Blackhound, at the beginning of the ordeal i did the inform course, and we have had 6 sessions with Relate.

With regards to me, i find it really hard talking about IT, even now im getting really anxious. Saying it out loud just makes me feel sick, ashamed and brings all the feelings of the knock back.

I just feel soo low and i dont know how to get out of this rut??

Mata

nicenana

Member since
March 2019

243 posts

Posted Wed October 28, 2020 8:04pmReport post

Hi Mata

i feel exactly as you do. My son is in prison and coming home next month. There is no help for me or his dad and sister to deal with our feelings. I feel glad that my son is coming home but my anxiety is also through the roof for fear of anyone finding out about it in our new area. The government don't seem to understand that the offenders family need support to.the whole process interferes with your mental and physical health and the officials don't seem to give a toss. All they want to do is tick their boxes where the offender is concerned so that their backs are covered should anything go wrong. I have limited family of which only one I was lose to but she passed away last year. I always spoke to her about all of this because she truly understood how I felt about everything. I feel like I've lost my rock since she passed away. I have my husband and daughter and son in law but I rarely talk about what's inside of me to them because I feel like they are all carrying their own burdens about everything that's happened.

That said, I'm lucky. I connected with a few people from here through mumsnet and joined a wassap group for support. I met a lady on there who lives in my area and we meet up every so often which really, really helps me. I also have another lady I've not met as she's far away but she has turned out to be a great source of information and support to me. On top of that I can ask advice if I need it on the wassap group. I won't say it gets rid of my anxiety but it does make a big difference to me. Thank you to all the ladies I've connected with on mumsnet through this site x

Blackhound

Member since
October 2020

479 posts

Posted Wed October 28, 2020 8:12pmReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Sat August 24, 2024 10:38am

Mata

Member since
May 2019

61 posts

Posted Wed October 28, 2020 8:31pmReport post

Niceanna - totally agree with you with regards to officals and ticking boxes! Im glad you have some support, and i hope this continues for you. X

Blackhound - I think you may be right, i wil have a look into a counsellor. Im like a pressure cooker at the moment....

Thankyou both for your replies i really appreciate it

Mata xx