Just need to talk
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Hi Yazzman,
just wanted to reach out as I read your post yesterday but didn’t have time to reply.
I left my partner when he was arrested. I was 5 months pregnant at the time and looking back it was an instinctive thing to do as I didn’t know the details of what had happened. I was shocked , scared and terrified my children would be taken away if I stayed. To be honest I thought( was hoping) that as time went on and I learned more about the offence it would all make sense and be a terrible mistake; an accident, something he got caught up in by mistake due to the abuse in his past. I loved him so much I just wanted us to be together and for it all to go away. As time went on though It became clear that wasn’t the case. The last conversation I had with him I will never forget. He told me more about what he had done and I realised I couldn’t forgive it, I’ve tried but I just can’t. I love him and miss him every day. I adored him but I can’t stand to even hear his voice now ( I havnt seen him since the arrest)
He wants to see his daughter but I’ve said no, not until I know the charges ( I don’t trust him and feel there may be more to what he has told me) I feel his pain, but I’m protecting my daughter from this mess for as long as I can.
Move had counselling and that’s helped a lot, I don’t fall asleep crying and wake up longing to see him anymore. I’ve even had a few good days lately. My friends have kept me sane and my love for my kids keeps me going each day. Xxx
just wanted to reach out as I read your post yesterday but didn’t have time to reply.
I left my partner when he was arrested. I was 5 months pregnant at the time and looking back it was an instinctive thing to do as I didn’t know the details of what had happened. I was shocked , scared and terrified my children would be taken away if I stayed. To be honest I thought( was hoping) that as time went on and I learned more about the offence it would all make sense and be a terrible mistake; an accident, something he got caught up in by mistake due to the abuse in his past. I loved him so much I just wanted us to be together and for it all to go away. As time went on though It became clear that wasn’t the case. The last conversation I had with him I will never forget. He told me more about what he had done and I realised I couldn’t forgive it, I’ve tried but I just can’t. I love him and miss him every day. I adored him but I can’t stand to even hear his voice now ( I havnt seen him since the arrest)
He wants to see his daughter but I’ve said no, not until I know the charges ( I don’t trust him and feel there may be more to what he has told me) I feel his pain, but I’m protecting my daughter from this mess for as long as I can.
Move had counselling and that’s helped a lot, I don’t fall asleep crying and wake up longing to see him anymore. I’ve even had a few good days lately. My friends have kept me sane and my love for my kids keeps me going each day. Xxx
Post deleted by user
Post deleted by user
Post deleted by user
Hi Yazz
Sorry to hear that you're struggling so much hunny.
I know you've tooed and frowed about whether to stay with him. Nobody can make that decision for you.
As you know I intend on staying with my husband but it's not easy. I've no idea what the future holds. For now I am taking things a day at a time. With 2 kids and almost 21 years behind us... I feel that there's a lot to fight for.. In many ways it would be easier to walk away.. Especially if no kids are involved.
Are you thinking of doing the inform course? I am 3 weeks in. Its really good for helping to understand. It could help you to make your decision too xx
Sorry to hear that you're struggling so much hunny.
I know you've tooed and frowed about whether to stay with him. Nobody can make that decision for you.
As you know I intend on staying with my husband but it's not easy. I've no idea what the future holds. For now I am taking things a day at a time. With 2 kids and almost 21 years behind us... I feel that there's a lot to fight for.. In many ways it would be easier to walk away.. Especially if no kids are involved.
Are you thinking of doing the inform course? I am 3 weeks in. Its really good for helping to understand. It could help you to make your decision too xx
Hi blackhound
Yeah as far as I know all devices have been checked and I can't go too much more into it on here if you understand. I can't even ask him questions because he gets upset and shuts me down. Some of his actions make me suspicious. If he's done it I just wish he'd be completely honest.
I want to support him because if he is telling the truth he literally has no other grown up people who know who support him. But I'm struggling. I feel like I'm living a lie and not being true to myself.
Hi rainbow
I'm just having a hard day. On lock down now and lots of thinking time ain't doing me good.
Yep still tooing and frooing over what to do. I'm more at the at the point now of the end.i just need to put that too him.
I can offer him friendship but I think a future for us is completely out of the question.
He's brought so much upset to me, to the point I'm seeking councilling to be able to function on the daily. He's lied to me hid this and showed me a side to him I don't wish to make a life with. I miss him terribly what we had but I just want to feel normal again.
I hope you are all doing well and your hb has settled into his flat. I'm glad the course is helping you too. I really hope you make it.
I think when I end this relationship I will continue with the councilling iv started to help me heal and I will then leave this site as a way of getting back to my old life. But I will be forever grateful for you giving me advice and listening to me in my darkest times. I don't know you but I owe you a massive hug. Xx
Yeah as far as I know all devices have been checked and I can't go too much more into it on here if you understand. I can't even ask him questions because he gets upset and shuts me down. Some of his actions make me suspicious. If he's done it I just wish he'd be completely honest.
I want to support him because if he is telling the truth he literally has no other grown up people who know who support him. But I'm struggling. I feel like I'm living a lie and not being true to myself.
Hi rainbow
I'm just having a hard day. On lock down now and lots of thinking time ain't doing me good.
Yep still tooing and frooing over what to do. I'm more at the at the point now of the end.i just need to put that too him.
I can offer him friendship but I think a future for us is completely out of the question.
He's brought so much upset to me, to the point I'm seeking councilling to be able to function on the daily. He's lied to me hid this and showed me a side to him I don't wish to make a life with. I miss him terribly what we had but I just want to feel normal again.
I hope you are all doing well and your hb has settled into his flat. I'm glad the course is helping you too. I really hope you make it.
I think when I end this relationship I will continue with the councilling iv started to help me heal and I will then leave this site as a way of getting back to my old life. But I will be forever grateful for you giving me advice and listening to me in my darkest times. I don't know you but I owe you a massive hug. Xx
Awww Yazz just saw this hunny. No worries I'm glad I could be of help. You've helped me too... We are warrior women.. We help each other through this mess!!
Take care my love. I replied on your other post xxxx
Take care my love. I replied on your other post xxxx