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My house was visited yesterday morning at 6.30am and my husband arrested for indecent images of children and animals. My daughter is at university and I don't know how and when I am going to tell her.
He has not yet been charged but looks a strong possibility. We have been married for 26 years and overnight I have lost my best friend, husband and probably my house.
What do I do now? I'm so angry with myself because I just can't stop crying. I'm most afraid of people finding out - not family but people in the community. I really don't know what to do next.
He has not yet been charged but looks a strong possibility. We have been married for 26 years and overnight I have lost my best friend, husband and probably my house.
What do I do now? I'm so angry with myself because I just can't stop crying. I'm most afraid of people finding out - not family but people in the community. I really don't know what to do next.
Hi,
I'm sorry that you find yourself here. I'm not sure if you have read my previous posts so I'll explain a bit about my circumstances. I have two teenage children from a previous relationship and I'm pregnant. I chose to tell my children straight away because I wanted to be certain that nothing inappropriate had ever happened to them. The knock was at the end of July and my now ex partner is still in remand awaiting a sentencing date. You know your daughter better than anyone but I know that my children would have been angry with me if I had kept this from them. It worries me that you are angry with yourself for crying, it is a grieving process. We grieve for the person we love, our children and the person we were as I'm yet to feel like myself for very long. Reach out to trusted family and friends. When you feel able to, seek some counselling for yourself. I can't really offer anything about the community finding out because it is something that I haven't experienced yet and still scares me. Take each day as it comes, eat what you can when you can and rest. Sending love xx
I'm sorry that you find yourself here. I'm not sure if you have read my previous posts so I'll explain a bit about my circumstances. I have two teenage children from a previous relationship and I'm pregnant. I chose to tell my children straight away because I wanted to be certain that nothing inappropriate had ever happened to them. The knock was at the end of July and my now ex partner is still in remand awaiting a sentencing date. You know your daughter better than anyone but I know that my children would have been angry with me if I had kept this from them. It worries me that you are angry with yourself for crying, it is a grieving process. We grieve for the person we love, our children and the person we were as I'm yet to feel like myself for very long. Reach out to trusted family and friends. When you feel able to, seek some counselling for yourself. I can't really offer anything about the community finding out because it is something that I haven't experienced yet and still scares me. Take each day as it comes, eat what you can when you can and rest. Sending love xx
Heya Bluegiraffe,
Sorry you've found yourself here, it's a group nobody wants to join. You'll find no judgement in this group. I would say since it's so raw just feel the emotions you need to feel for now, there's no correct way to process this. Reach out to Lucy Faithful help when you're feeling low. When you're ready arrange a StopSo therapist or a psychosexual therapist...
I too and am worried about the community side of things...
Do you know much about your husbands arrest or anything like that?
As for your daughter, obviously when your ready to tell her do so but the sooner the better as you can both lean on each other maybe?
Sorry you've found yourself here, it's a group nobody wants to join. You'll find no judgement in this group. I would say since it's so raw just feel the emotions you need to feel for now, there's no correct way to process this. Reach out to Lucy Faithful help when you're feeling low. When you're ready arrange a StopSo therapist or a psychosexual therapist...
I too and am worried about the community side of things...
Do you know much about your husbands arrest or anything like that?
As for your daughter, obviously when your ready to tell her do so but the sooner the better as you can both lean on each other maybe?
Thank you both so much for your kind words.
I have told my daughter and already taking comfort from sharing with her. She has blown me away in how well she is handling everything.
Don't know much just that they have found images and are continuing to search the other devices.
I have told my daughter and already taking comfort from sharing with her. She has blown me away in how well she is handling everything.
Don't know much just that they have found images and are continuing to search the other devices.