Feeling Helpless and Scared
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I am located in the US but could not find anything comparable to this resource for US residents. I am 8 months pregnant with our first child, and we received the knock about 2.5 weeks ago. The police said they received a report that 3 CP images (technically two different images, one was shown twice) were pinged on a now deactivated Snapchat account used by my husband on a date that he doesn't even believe he had the Snapchat activated. They seized his devices and left. He has not been arrested or charged yet. He is adamant that he has never intentionally gone looking for CP. He said the only thing he thinks it could be is that he would have random people he didn't know from all over add him on Snapchat and one of the users sent him hundreds of pornographic photos at once. He said none of them appeared to be underage just by glancing through them. The local police called a few days later and said they had not found anything on his phone so they have sent it off for forensic analysis to look at backups. We are young professionals just starting out, and I am terrified our lives and the life of our new baby is about to be completely ruined. We went and spoke to an attorney today who said while it sounds like we have a defensible case if what my husband says is the truth, the outlook is not good for these types of cases in the jurisdiction that is investigating it and we don't have the money to hire a good attorney. He said all we can do right now is continue to live our lives as normally as possible until we know what is found on the phone. I live in fear every single day that they will show up to arrest my husband at any moment and worry for my son's future and my own. The only person who knows any of this is going on is my husband's father. My own parents know something is wrong, but I just keep telling them I'm tired from pregnancy. My husband and I both have cried every day since the knock. I don't know how I am going to get through this if something is found or how I am going to take care of a baby as a new mom with this going on or even show my face in society. Any words of encouragement would be appreciated. Thank you for reading.
Hi hopeless.
im sorry to hear about you and your husband getting the knock. I am in Scotland so I'm not sure about the laws in the us but I do know that we all feel the same or similar in this situation. I am the mother of an offender so no experience with husband or partner getting the knock but there are lots of really good people on this site in a similar situation to you who will give you support and advice.
I would urge you to take one day or hour at a time. Try and keep as calm as you can, not easy I know. Tell your parents if you think they will be of support to you. One thing I will say though, be careful who you tell. I'm in Scotland and here and in England we are all very careful who we tell because sometimes the reaction is good but other times it's not good. Trouble is, once you tell someone, you can't I tell them if their reaction goes badly.
im not sure about us law but here it takes about seven months from charge to going to court. In England it's usually a lot longer. Some ladies have been waiting over two years for the whole thing to be dealt with so it can be a very long process.
I hope some of the other ladies reply to your post who have more knowledge about the process to advise you better than I can. In meantime, know that you can come on here at anytime of the day or night for advice, support or to let of steam. Take care for now x
im sorry to hear about you and your husband getting the knock. I am in Scotland so I'm not sure about the laws in the us but I do know that we all feel the same or similar in this situation. I am the mother of an offender so no experience with husband or partner getting the knock but there are lots of really good people on this site in a similar situation to you who will give you support and advice.
I would urge you to take one day or hour at a time. Try and keep as calm as you can, not easy I know. Tell your parents if you think they will be of support to you. One thing I will say though, be careful who you tell. I'm in Scotland and here and in England we are all very careful who we tell because sometimes the reaction is good but other times it's not good. Trouble is, once you tell someone, you can't I tell them if their reaction goes badly.
im not sure about us law but here it takes about seven months from charge to going to court. In England it's usually a lot longer. Some ladies have been waiting over two years for the whole thing to be dealt with so it can be a very long process.
I hope some of the other ladies reply to your post who have more knowledge about the process to advise you better than I can. In meantime, know that you can come on here at anytime of the day or night for advice, support or to let of steam. Take care for now x
I also don't know how the process works in the US so apologise that my response won't be helpful but I just wanted to say I'm so sorry you find yourself here. It is a waiting game and the feeling of being so out of control is hard. I send you lots of love and strength x