The Ending.
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The Ending...
The knock it came, then the sorrow, the painful truth and lost tomorrows,
The yesterdays all based on lies, the sleepless nights, the tears I cry.
And though I thought I knew him well, I did not know, he did not tell,
I never screamed, I never yelled, the pain I felt who could foretell.
Will they judge me, I judge him, why can't he see the mess he's in?
His moral compass runs off course, his twisted thoughts are all the source.
This misery I can't convey, please rewind three weeks,one day,
Make this nightmare go away, I cannot breath, I cannot stay.
There's no mistake, he made a choice, those children had no chance, no voice,
Their souls destroyed for his own pleasure, their fear, their pain cannot be measured.
And all the while I let him in, my heart, my bed, my body, his sin.
I cannot eat, I cannot sleep, what secrets does this monster keep?
For love I changed my life and name, now trust's replaced with lies and shame,
And though I know I'm not to blame, how did I miss what he became?
How could he come with hopes and dreams, then rip my world out by the seams,
An empty void where a heart should be and there's no remorse that I can see.
The man I felt I loved so much, I cannot bare the thought to touch,
Can you seperate the act, the crime, when a human being gets lost in time?
Can you ever really right a wrong, if it doesn't break me will it make me strong?
With my finger tips i've been holding on, but when he wakes tomorrow he'll know i'm gone.
I won't have to see his eyes, his tears, his pleading look or hear his fears.
Is my hope misplaced to think he'll disappear, or will he get the message loud and clear?
The marriage now I have to break, for me, for him, for all our sakes,
My wedding ring for him to find, the quote rings true, that “love is blind”.
(For every woman that feels my pain, that has walked in my shoes, that is feeling the strain,
I light a candle for you, I am holding your hand, noone's alone if together we stand.)
The knock it came, then the sorrow, the painful truth and lost tomorrows,
The yesterdays all based on lies, the sleepless nights, the tears I cry.
And though I thought I knew him well, I did not know, he did not tell,
I never screamed, I never yelled, the pain I felt who could foretell.
Will they judge me, I judge him, why can't he see the mess he's in?
His moral compass runs off course, his twisted thoughts are all the source.
This misery I can't convey, please rewind three weeks,one day,
Make this nightmare go away, I cannot breath, I cannot stay.
There's no mistake, he made a choice, those children had no chance, no voice,
Their souls destroyed for his own pleasure, their fear, their pain cannot be measured.
And all the while I let him in, my heart, my bed, my body, his sin.
I cannot eat, I cannot sleep, what secrets does this monster keep?
For love I changed my life and name, now trust's replaced with lies and shame,
And though I know I'm not to blame, how did I miss what he became?
How could he come with hopes and dreams, then rip my world out by the seams,
An empty void where a heart should be and there's no remorse that I can see.
The man I felt I loved so much, I cannot bare the thought to touch,
Can you seperate the act, the crime, when a human being gets lost in time?
Can you ever really right a wrong, if it doesn't break me will it make me strong?
With my finger tips i've been holding on, but when he wakes tomorrow he'll know i'm gone.
I won't have to see his eyes, his tears, his pleading look or hear his fears.
Is my hope misplaced to think he'll disappear, or will he get the message loud and clear?
The marriage now I have to break, for me, for him, for all our sakes,
My wedding ring for him to find, the quote rings true, that “love is blind”.
(For every woman that feels my pain, that has walked in my shoes, that is feeling the strain,
I light a candle for you, I am holding your hand, noone's alone if together we stand.)
Just read your poem and made me cry. Wishing you all the best.
Love the last couple of lines, thank you
Phoenix27! Thank you for your beautiful words! So heartfelt and emotive! I felt like you could read my mind!!!
The poem is like no other.
thank you for sharing. Xxxx
The poem is like no other.
thank you for sharing. Xxxx
Phoenix 27
All I can say is,, Its as if you were writing exactly how I think and feel and have done every day for nearly a year now.x
All I can say is,, Its as if you were writing exactly how I think and feel and have done every day for nearly a year now.x
This is beautiful and heartbreaking. Thank you it has given me strength.
Very talented. Nearly two years down the line I would not be able to put this horror into something that becomes a beautiful piece of writing. Thank you. Xxx
To every single woman who has commented on my post...Thankyou for your kind words, it means everything.
You are all strong and inspiring and I know I do not travel this journey alone.
Writing is the only way in which I can articulate my thoughts and emotions at present.
If my writing touches anyone in regards to their own story, then you know, I walk with you.
Be kind to yourselves!
Love and best wishes to you all. X
The Ending..Part 2
I want to offer words of hope, that this will pass, that I will cope,
That one day I'll have peace of mind and step by step I'll surely find,
A way to make a brand new start and slowly mend my broken heart.
Then free myself from all this pain and maybe try to love again.
My head it hurts, I pace the floor, nothing matters like before,
For all the years that you invest, the ending's so hard to digest.
Your hopes, your dreams all disappear, in turn replaced by shock and fear,
Promises that turn to dust, there's no more “we”, there's no more “us”.
A mothers love, her only son, I wonder how she'll carry on,
When truth reveals it's ugly head, will she take back the words she said?
They can't believe that I am gone, yet won't believe what he has done.
They cannot see what he's become, they won't accept their son is wrong.
And all the while I scream inside, for every lie that he compiled,
For all the victims, every child, who thought that he was good and kind.
There seems to be a heavy cost, for loving him and all I've lost,
Once idyllic, now a sham, I wish I'd never met that man!
I wonder if our love was real, or if this monster even feels?
Or was this marriage just a show, for all the things I didn't know?
I hope the time he gets is spent, on hands and knees, will he repent?
I wonder how things could have been, if he'd been a decent human being.
Here I stand my heart is shattered, dreams in pieces, life in tatters
And as I witness things unravel, I find myself on a road less travelled.
And even though this is an end, I'll take baby steps, till I can run again,
I won't be defined by this or him, a choice to make, to sink or swim?
Please take this box and close the lid, he can't undo the things he did.
I can't keep clinging to the past, at my age time ticks by too fast.
For all the bad out weighs the good, there's no more could haves, no more shoulds,
No more what ifs, no more whys, no more heartache, no more lies.
An empty void to fill the space, my tired soul, my worn out face,
The aftermath is hard to bare, with red raw eyes, a vacant stare.
And though I'm down and full of doubt, I know I'll learn to live without,
A man that never cared for me, there seems in life no guarantees.
I pray the thoughts I think don't last, I pray in time that this will pass.
A day worth living does await, as soon as I can stand up straight.
A ray of hope and fingers crossed, that all in life has not been lost,
A happy life I will sustain and wake up to the sun again.
You are all strong and inspiring and I know I do not travel this journey alone.
Writing is the only way in which I can articulate my thoughts and emotions at present.
If my writing touches anyone in regards to their own story, then you know, I walk with you.
Be kind to yourselves!
Love and best wishes to you all. X
The Ending..Part 2
I want to offer words of hope, that this will pass, that I will cope,
That one day I'll have peace of mind and step by step I'll surely find,
A way to make a brand new start and slowly mend my broken heart.
Then free myself from all this pain and maybe try to love again.
My head it hurts, I pace the floor, nothing matters like before,
For all the years that you invest, the ending's so hard to digest.
Your hopes, your dreams all disappear, in turn replaced by shock and fear,
Promises that turn to dust, there's no more “we”, there's no more “us”.
A mothers love, her only son, I wonder how she'll carry on,
When truth reveals it's ugly head, will she take back the words she said?
They can't believe that I am gone, yet won't believe what he has done.
They cannot see what he's become, they won't accept their son is wrong.
And all the while I scream inside, for every lie that he compiled,
For all the victims, every child, who thought that he was good and kind.
There seems to be a heavy cost, for loving him and all I've lost,
Once idyllic, now a sham, I wish I'd never met that man!
I wonder if our love was real, or if this monster even feels?
Or was this marriage just a show, for all the things I didn't know?
I hope the time he gets is spent, on hands and knees, will he repent?
I wonder how things could have been, if he'd been a decent human being.
Here I stand my heart is shattered, dreams in pieces, life in tatters
And as I witness things unravel, I find myself on a road less travelled.
And even though this is an end, I'll take baby steps, till I can run again,
I won't be defined by this or him, a choice to make, to sink or swim?
Please take this box and close the lid, he can't undo the things he did.
I can't keep clinging to the past, at my age time ticks by too fast.
For all the bad out weighs the good, there's no more could haves, no more shoulds,
No more what ifs, no more whys, no more heartache, no more lies.
An empty void to fill the space, my tired soul, my worn out face,
The aftermath is hard to bare, with red raw eyes, a vacant stare.
And though I'm down and full of doubt, I know I'll learn to live without,
A man that never cared for me, there seems in life no guarantees.
I pray the thoughts I think don't last, I pray in time that this will pass.
A day worth living does await, as soon as I can stand up straight.
A ray of hope and fingers crossed, that all in life has not been lost,
A happy life I will sustain and wake up to the sun again.