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Young kids and their Grandad

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Rosieposie

Member since
March 2021

4 posts

Posted Tue April 6, 2021 11:53amReport post

Sorry for the long post!

My two girls are 8 and 10. I had to explain to my eldest that my parents had separated recently after she'd asked me LOADS of questions at the weekend after seeing only my mother.



My father is being sentenced next week and I've been told by SS that there can be no unsupervised contact between him and his grandchildren until they are 18.

I have no interest in seeing my father again after everything that's happened over the last year. He's still in denial which is making things a lot harder and we've had no contact at all since it all came out.



My eldest daughter was absolutely devastated when I explained that my parents were having some space from each other. She was inconsolable for hours and ended up sleeping in my bed all night. She had millions of questions (most of which I couldn't answer) and was worried she'd never see her Grandad again and was sad for him being on his own.



I just have no idea how I can make excuses for the next 8 years of why they can't see their Grandad. I know my eldest will immediately think that she's done something wrong and there must be a reason why he doesn't want to see her. I just don't know what to say or do. I'm struggling to come to terms with it all myself, without also being bombarded with questions from my distraught daughter.



I removed his number from her phone a few weeks ago and I thought she hadn't noticed but when she was upset she said his number had gone from her phone and so she couldn't message him. She really is so upset and I just don't have the answers.



Does anyone have any advice? My youngest hasn't realised anything yet but my eldest is so switched on and thinks about everything so deeply. My therapist advised I came on this forum for advice from people who'd gone through a similar thing. Please help!