Why us?
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It's been nine months now since the knock. And in that moment life changed forever. Our happy, close, stable family unit was blown up into smithereens. I feel like I've changed as a person, it's changed me and that makes me really sad and angry because why can something I didn't do and had no control over change me so much? I'm now a quiet, sad person but when people ask me what's wrong, I can't share it. I'm in a private hell of my own. I think about it all day every day and even have horrific dreams about it. I feel so detached from life, I don't care about anything anymore because I know that nothing is ever going to be the same. I feel so depressed. I'm already on antidepressants and tried a counsellor but it didn't work out with her. And I found it really difficult to open up to someone over zoom. I know I need further counselling but where do you start with looking for someone? there are so many out there.
I just always think, why us.
I just always think, why us.
JE
I feel like the same I keep looking at other people and think why us, we have a nice home, both had jobs we enjoyed. He hasn't got his now. We spent lots of family time together. That's all over now I am not the same person, it's make me really sad too. This is when I'm with people who don't know I feel my life just a big lie I too am now quiet, I also can't share it. It's not like you can drop it it in a conversation and I don't want to. I feel I don't want to keep talking about it. Its not my crime, but it sure feels like it. I don't talk now to anyone the only place is this forum.
It a very sad and lonely place and my heart breaks every time I see a new family join this forum.
Keep writing on here, let it out.
Take care of you
Anne x
I feel like the same I keep looking at other people and think why us, we have a nice home, both had jobs we enjoyed. He hasn't got his now. We spent lots of family time together. That's all over now I am not the same person, it's make me really sad too. This is when I'm with people who don't know I feel my life just a big lie I too am now quiet, I also can't share it. It's not like you can drop it it in a conversation and I don't want to. I feel I don't want to keep talking about it. Its not my crime, but it sure feels like it. I don't talk now to anyone the only place is this forum.
It a very sad and lonely place and my heart breaks every time I see a new family join this forum.
Keep writing on here, let it out.
Take care of you
Anne x
Hey hunny
So sorry to hear you're feeling so rubbish. It is very hard to keep yourself going with such uncertainty and worry hanging over us.
Lots of meditation really does help control those negative thoughts.
As for therapy.. I have had 3 NHS counsellors and not one was trained in this field or had even heard of Lucy faithful. I am now waiting for counselling via stop so... As they are specialists and understand... Many women I know have used them and they've really helped them. Xx
So sorry to hear you're feeling so rubbish. It is very hard to keep yourself going with such uncertainty and worry hanging over us.
Lots of meditation really does help control those negative thoughts.
As for therapy.. I have had 3 NHS counsellors and not one was trained in this field or had even heard of Lucy faithful. I am now waiting for counselling via stop so... As they are specialists and understand... Many women I know have used them and they've really helped them. Xx
Hi JE sorry you are feeling down. I can relate to how you feel there’s not a day goes by when I don’t think about it. It’s been over a year for me. It does get better but I still have bad days where I have a good cry and think why what for? we had the perfect life or so I thought. People were envious of us and the life we had, nice cars, house, fantastic holidays. He lost all that and got sent to prison. Now I’m envious of other people’s lives. It’s a lonely situation to be in, I don’t really talk about it anymore to people they all found out when it hit the press and have made up their own minds anyway but after it dies down I think people think you should have moved on, not so simple. It does make u a different person. I've never tried a counsellor I've no idea how much they cost and they can't wave a magic wand and make it all go back to normal but knowing there are others on this forum in the same situation has helped me x
I contacted stop so for a therapist but when they eventually got back to me it was £90 per session:-( I'm now on my own trying to find the money to pay bills, never mind £90 for an hours therapy. Hopefully someone a bit cheaper will be available