Telling my child
Notifications OFF
Hi, everyone.
My partner said some things in an online chat about "touching" one of my children (the court established he had not) and what he was going to do to my other child (again, court established he did nothing).
My eldest is under 10, and the SW has told me that an "expert" is going to tell my eldest what their father said about both children in explicit detail.
I think this is wrong, at this moment, although they may need to be told in the future. Has anyone else been forced by SWs to tell a young child about parental offending in explicit detail?
My partner said some things in an online chat about "touching" one of my children (the court established he had not) and what he was going to do to my other child (again, court established he did nothing).
My eldest is under 10, and the SW has told me that an "expert" is going to tell my eldest what their father said about both children in explicit detail.
I think this is wrong, at this moment, although they may need to be told in the future. Has anyone else been forced by SWs to tell a young child about parental offending in explicit detail?
Although I havnt been through what you are going through and I'm so sorry to read your story how devastating for you.
I would not be allowing this to happen this is far too much especially for a 10 y/o, I would speak to the manager of ss and I'd also be contacting a family rights group as this could do so much damage I just don't understand it, what is it going to achieve ? You will need to act quick on this.
Please update sending you a virtual hugx
I would not be allowing this to happen this is far too much especially for a 10 y/o, I would speak to the manager of ss and I'd also be contacting a family rights group as this could do so much damage I just don't understand it, what is it going to achieve ? You will need to act quick on this.
Please update sending you a virtual hugx
Hi Hun! Such a stressful time for you!
Oh god that's just something I can not understand... Do these SW even release how this all effects our children, just not having their dad's around let alone learning why!! My daughter is 10. My SW has brought up on a few occasions what my daughter knows and I've made it very clear that I ... ME ... her Mummy! Will be the one to tell her anything and that I will ONLY do it if it is in HER BEST INTEREST. Not so it's one less thing for the sw to worry about. I called the helpline and they did say honesty with children is best which I understand but I don't want to tell her and the helpline said they will help me with what to say if and when the time comes... They were very understanding and were ready with lots of advice with how to tell her if I wanted to. I told the SW this and she backed off and tbh seemed a bit intimidated by the helplines knowledgeable offer of support in this and that I was being proactive on this and not just saying yes to the SW all the time. I would also suggest calling the family rights group, they've helped me so many times. Also email children's services and ask them to explain exactly why this would be in your child's best interest to know the details, what outcome are they hoping to achieve from telling her, in detail how they will support your child after she is told this, make it clear they would be going against your wishes and tell them you're seeking further advice from else where(frg).. The family rights groups will be great to help you with an email, I often tell them what I want to say and they'll go over it with me and give me advice to get some specific words in. I spent 4 months being terrified of SS and saying yes to everything then I realised that the more you say yes the less they seem to think of your strength. Once you stand up to them they do back down, listen and maybe respect us more and you as the parent/mum absolutely have every right to make decisions and be listened too! They shouldn't be saying we're doing this, regardless!
Sorry the way replying to these posts works means I can't see your message whilst replying so not sure if you said anything sbout this on there.... What stage are you at with SS Hun? Safety plan, CIN, CPP.
XXX hugs XXX
Oh god that's just something I can not understand... Do these SW even release how this all effects our children, just not having their dad's around let alone learning why!! My daughter is 10. My SW has brought up on a few occasions what my daughter knows and I've made it very clear that I ... ME ... her Mummy! Will be the one to tell her anything and that I will ONLY do it if it is in HER BEST INTEREST. Not so it's one less thing for the sw to worry about. I called the helpline and they did say honesty with children is best which I understand but I don't want to tell her and the helpline said they will help me with what to say if and when the time comes... They were very understanding and were ready with lots of advice with how to tell her if I wanted to. I told the SW this and she backed off and tbh seemed a bit intimidated by the helplines knowledgeable offer of support in this and that I was being proactive on this and not just saying yes to the SW all the time. I would also suggest calling the family rights group, they've helped me so many times. Also email children's services and ask them to explain exactly why this would be in your child's best interest to know the details, what outcome are they hoping to achieve from telling her, in detail how they will support your child after she is told this, make it clear they would be going against your wishes and tell them you're seeking further advice from else where(frg).. The family rights groups will be great to help you with an email, I often tell them what I want to say and they'll go over it with me and give me advice to get some specific words in. I spent 4 months being terrified of SS and saying yes to everything then I realised that the more you say yes the less they seem to think of your strength. Once you stand up to them they do back down, listen and maybe respect us more and you as the parent/mum absolutely have every right to make decisions and be listened too! They shouldn't be saying we're doing this, regardless!
Sorry the way replying to these posts works means I can't see your message whilst replying so not sure if you said anything sbout this on there.... What stage are you at with SS Hun? Safety plan, CIN, CPP.
XXX hugs XXX