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Unsupervised contact - is there a possibility this can happen?

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Dazedandconfused31

Member since
June 2021

4 posts

Posted Sat June 5, 2021 2:30pmReport post

Hi all my husband was arrested over 2 years ago now , he was caught speaking with an undercover cop who he thought was a 13 year old girl this seems to have been an isolated incident with no images found or any else other than the chat. He was given a suspended sentence 30 hrs therapy and various different bans and registers.
There has been no evidence that he is a risk to our 9 yr old - I've always felt he was idolised by our son and have never seen anything untoward.
we have both engaged with ss and probation (he no longer lives with us abd lives 5 hrs drive away) the probation officer says that in his view he shouldn't have unspervised contact until he's 18 as my son may have young female friends that he shouldn't be around. is this common practice or is there a programme that they can follow to be assessed as safe to have unsupervised visits ? Also my son doesn't know the full reasons as to what his dad did , I'm dreading the day he finds out and have asked for support from ss and anyone who would listen on how to broach this with him.
any insights from you would be most gratefully received

SadAndWorried

Member since
October 2019

154 posts

Posted Mon June 7, 2021 5:17pmReport post

Hi Dazedandconfused31,

I can't help with the unsupervised contact question. I'd be interested to know the answer too though. But with telling you son, I've spoken to the helpline about this in the past and they were ready to help me with lots of advice and support so maybe give them a call. I haven't told my daughter who is 10 either but she'll have to be told someday. xx

Xxx

BelleBee

Member since
April 2020

149 posts

Posted Mon June 7, 2021 7:33pmReport post

Dazed and confused...

my husband now lives back at home with unsupervised contact with our children. He was assessed by probabtion as being very low risk of a contact offence and we were also both assessed by SS who are no longer involved with us. My husband had a number of IIOC (less than 10) My youngest doesn't know what happened but I've done lots of works with her (such as nspcc pants work). I guess you would need both probabtion and SS involved if you want to pursue this? My husband has a very supportive probabtion officer who has been really good and has very much facilitated things for us.
take care xx

Jellyhead85

Member since
November 2020

3 posts

Posted Mon June 7, 2021 11:32pmReport post

Hi dazed and confused,

We also want to move towards unsupervised contact between my partner and my daughter in the future. We have been told to ask social services for a specialised assesment before we live together again, we are hoping to do this next year in readiness for him coming off the register in january 2023.

Is asking for an assesment from ss a possibility maybe?

xxx

Cher

Member since
March 2019

103 posts

Posted Tue June 8, 2021 10:53amReport post

My ex keeps talking about trying to get unsupervised visits with my daughter. I'm terrified this will happen, he was charged with 10 images 2 cat A . I'm hoping SS will say a flat out no, but I still have that worry he will get unsupervised. You cannot know 100% they would be safe and that is not a risk I'm willing to take.