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So lost and lonely

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Starry

Member since
June 2021

85 posts

Posted Wed June 16, 2021 7:24pmReport post

We had the knock nearly 3 months ago and my husband has been released under investigation following information that he had iioc on his phone All his devices except his mobile have been cleared.
mom the day he was interviewed and released he tried to commit suicide. Was in hospital for weeks as he wasn't safe to be left out.
he has no bail restrictions. He is at home with me and our children ( he is there very much for the sake of the kids).
I go between hating him for what he has done to ruin my life now and how my life will turn out and feeling sorry for him. I know our friends will hate us and will not want to know us. My heart breaks for my poor children who have done nothing wrong.
He still says that some days, not every day he has suicidal thoughts but is trying hard to distract himself. He is paying for private therapy and has been in touch with lff. I want to help him but then I hate him for what he has done. I can't be everything to everyone and I am also out of the house while I am working and worry about him.
I just want my old life back .........

Tracey

Member since
December 2018

450 posts

Posted Wed June 16, 2021 10:25pmReport post

Hi Starry

You're doing so well and managing so many things through a really crappy time.

Have you phoned the helpline, they really know their stuff and will be able to help you.

Is your husband under the mental health team or GP? It's a terrible worry for you on top of everything else.

Unfortunately these things move so slowly which just add to the stress for everyone, then there is the "what it's" and also the thoughts of others if they knew.

All I would say is breathe and take time for you. Make sure your husband is getting all the help he can for his mental health issues but please look after you too. It's really important you keep well because of the children.

Keep coming on here, you'll get nothing but support

much love xx