Firstly can I apologise. Ihave been reading posts but not replying...
Mainly cos I'm struggling. I'm slightly further along this journey even though only 3 months have passed. 3 months of this hell...
Good points ....I'm still here surviving! I've returned to work! Still attending counselling...kids are good n still unaware! Hubby is slightly not as broken...
People are moving on. I'm very much yesterday's news although I am still given well meaning"advice". I'm just struggling with the betrayal. And the fact I'm a single parent with a husband. He won't walk out the front door. He is unable to Do much! The house/finances/parenting/everything is now my sole responsibility.He wants to just sit n be cuddled! It's exhausting.... I think I still love him BUT where is my strong man. My partner in crime. The person who i trusted with my life... My kids life! The one who got me...laughed at me ....n adored me? Why did he do this? Why did he throw our life away for one conversation .....? Why did he feel the need to talk to other women ? He says he doesn't know. Why why why???
I'm angry. Tired. And lost.I just want one day of feeling happy and rested...
Emotional and needing to vent. Not be judged.Sorry.
Mainly cos I'm struggling. I'm slightly further along this journey even though only 3 months have passed. 3 months of this hell...
Good points ....I'm still here surviving! I've returned to work! Still attending counselling...kids are good n still unaware! Hubby is slightly not as broken...
People are moving on. I'm very much yesterday's news although I am still given well meaning"advice". I'm just struggling with the betrayal. And the fact I'm a single parent with a husband. He won't walk out the front door. He is unable to Do much! The house/finances/parenting/everything is now my sole responsibility.He wants to just sit n be cuddled! It's exhausting.... I think I still love him BUT where is my strong man. My partner in crime. The person who i trusted with my life... My kids life! The one who got me...laughed at me ....n adored me? Why did he do this? Why did he throw our life away for one conversation .....? Why did he feel the need to talk to other women ? He says he doesn't know. Why why why???
I'm angry. Tired. And lost.I just want one day of feeling happy and rested...
Emotional and needing to vent. Not be judged.Sorry.
Sad sad,
there is no timeline of grief.
Your life has been turned upside down, there is no need to apologise.
i am angry with my husband too for throwing something I valued so much away. I have yet to get any answers either and think it’s complicated and a mental health issue nothing we did.
we are probably similar timeframes through as my knock was just before Christmas.
some days are better than others.
like you I am worried about managing everything as a single parent.
i am not even back at work yet, so your doing well.
please please be kind to yourself. I know it’s hard advice to take as you sound really giving but you must look after your self first.
i know what you mean about your husband he is likely going to need professional work to get through this and re build his self esteem. I am not with my husband anymore but he has regressed to a childlike state and playing the victim in this. I still worry about him . Not sure if I could live with him at the time so massive respect for you sad sad.
i am finding the waiting around for the situation to resolve itself and the criminal justice situation to be over. We are unfairly caught up in this. Please be kind to yourself and don’t feel guilty for feeling frustrated and annoyed.
you are allowed to feel like this. All my love Beth Lou xxx
there is no timeline of grief.
Your life has been turned upside down, there is no need to apologise.
i am angry with my husband too for throwing something I valued so much away. I have yet to get any answers either and think it’s complicated and a mental health issue nothing we did.
we are probably similar timeframes through as my knock was just before Christmas.
some days are better than others.
like you I am worried about managing everything as a single parent.
i am not even back at work yet, so your doing well.
please please be kind to yourself. I know it’s hard advice to take as you sound really giving but you must look after your self first.
i know what you mean about your husband he is likely going to need professional work to get through this and re build his self esteem. I am not with my husband anymore but he has regressed to a childlike state and playing the victim in this. I still worry about him . Not sure if I could live with him at the time so massive respect for you sad sad.
i am finding the waiting around for the situation to resolve itself and the criminal justice situation to be over. We are unfairly caught up in this. Please be kind to yourself and don’t feel guilty for feeling frustrated and annoyed.
you are allowed to feel like this. All my love Beth Lou xxx
Im sorry to hear you are feeling down. The betrayal is hard to deal with. My husband did the same chatting with women online then ended up making the mistake of his life by continuing a conversation with someone who said they were under age (luckily it was an adult, that doesnt excuse his behaviour but im still glad it wasnt a child). The why only he can answer, was it sex addiction, porn addiction, a bad habit, a bit of fun, a mental illness like anxiety/depression that lead to using sexual chat as a boost. Is he seeking help? Like councelling, sex addicts annymous groups or any other kind of self help. Some of those can be done online so he wouldnt need to leave the house. He will hopefully pick himself back up if he seeks help. You have come a very long way and have done a great job getting through it all. There will be days when you feel down but there will also be good days. I started keeping a gratitude diary, every day i write down three good things that happened that day even if its just a really small thing. Its really nice to read over all the good things from the last six months. People love to dish out advice dont they, but like you say they will eventually move on to something else. Im not quite as far along in the process as you but i can see how far we have gone, all the progress that has been made, the spark returning to my husband, the burden of chat/porn addiction lifted. I hope i like you can get through to the end and come out the otherside.
It is just so hard.
I don't feel very strong. Some days are much harder than others. Some days it is just survival.
He is seeking help but it is slow. One day at a time! I find SS frustrating. One says one thing another says something different. So....
It's true...we are the real victims. I'm sure there is a light at the end of the tunnel but right now it's very far away.
Xxx love to you all xxx
I don't feel very strong. Some days are much harder than others. Some days it is just survival.
He is seeking help but it is slow. One day at a time! I find SS frustrating. One says one thing another says something different. So....
It's true...we are the real victims. I'm sure there is a light at the end of the tunnel but right now it's very far away.
Xxx love to you all xxx
Hi sad sad, so sorry you are having such a hard time. I think we are around the same time - though mine is 2 months. Like you, I am finding SS the hardest part - they just don’t seem to know what they are doing. Two months in and I am on my third social worker.....