Family and Friends Forum

Hi Paris

I'm sorry I don't have any experiences to share but I have looked at the possibility of taking action against the police once this mess is over for my family, we're currently waiting for the CPS to make charging decision.

There are solicitors who specialise in doing so and from looking through their site I discovered you can make action for emotional distress caused if they haven't followed the correct procedures.

That's the key factor though, the police are of course obligated to investigate any crime thoroughly. They are also obligated to follow their code of practice though so I would advise googling this and deciding if you feel they acted within their remit or not.

Then I guess you would need to speak to a solicitor specialising in taking action against the police.

My interaction with the police has left me traumatised and I've had, and am arranging more, counselling to help me with that and everything else from this whole thing. I found it really helpful just to rant to someone who would listen but understand that may not be a route you want to take.

Best of luck with everything xx

It really is a traumatising thing to go through and I hope you find counselling helpful.

You can make a complaint to the police standards division for your area. You can find their contact details on google or send the complaint to the police station that handled your case. One of their outcomes is explaining why things were the way they were, along with addressing any issues found in the way they operated. Perhaps this would help with closure?

I have made a complaint about various aspects of the investigation where the police failed to adhere to their own standards but they cannot/will not address it until my sons case is closed so I can't say how effective this process is. I'm hoping when they do investigate my complaint, they will be open to my criticism and work to make neccesary changes. We can hope! x

That's really frustrating but not that surprising to hear Lee1969

I'll likely do the same if I get the same response, my complaint was also mostly about the way they treated my children.

I was, and still am, so shocked by that aspect. The impact on children in the offenders family is completely disregarded which is not only horrendous but astonishing as these people are supposed to be proficient in safeguarding children!

I hope your family is doing well, I've gained a lot of knowledge and support from reading posts in the forum before I started posting, many of them yours so thank you for being so active in supporting others!

That's absolutely disgusting Lee, I'm so sorry you and your family have been/arr going through that!

For me it wasn't a matter of one officer (who sounds completely corrupt) but of many relatively minor indiscretion and lies from every single officer I dealt with.

As well as this, they failed to follow procedures or ensure my 17 year olds safety whilst in custody. He was suffering from psychosis and had lost touch with reality. The police were aware of this possibility and aware he had intended suicide before confessing to IIOC and contact offences (that hadn't happened). He claims several emotionally abusive things were said to him. I do believe him as he quoted something I had said to the officers but as I say he wasn't rooted in reality at the time so there is uncertainty.

My daughter was, in my opinion bullied and coerced when I foolishly allowed her to be alone with the police. The oic then called me afterward and blatantly lied about something she had said. He point blank refused to acknowledge my questions about this let alone provide answers.

Her initial comments, when I was there, were shamelessly changed to give them (I believe) more of a case to arrest my son and put bail conditions in place. Fortunately I have the social worker as a witness to what was actually said and am fortunate that she has been exceptionally supportive. Again, the police have refused point blank to even acknowledge my questions about this.

There seems to be a culture of avoiding scrutiny when mistakes are made which had a huge impact on me and my family, and no doubt on so many other families.

I ended up having a breakdown when the oic refused to communicate with me in writing, accused me of not acting in the best interests of my children because I requested he do so and told me he would be "informing social services of this". Again, I was so lucky to have the sw I did as she was calm, supportive and rational even though I was an absolute mess!

It's been a real eye opener. It's been sad and frustrating seeing how many people have had similar and unacceptable experiences with various services when at their most vulnerable.

I always held the police in very high regard and now absolutely agree with you Lee.

Zero respect for them or what they stand for.

Thanks Lee, I put in a complaint months ago, I also asked my MP support it which I highly recommend for anyone doing the same. Things have been a bit better since doing so.

Unfortunately my complaint won't even be looked at until my they have decided whether or not to charge my son (it's with the CPS now) which is ridiculous!

It is a terrifying thing to complain about, I was very fearful of retribution and people thinking that we deserve to be treated this way. But we have received nothing but support from everyone apart from the police.

I think it takes so much courage to disclose the situation to anyone, let alone dare to expect to be treated fairly that the police just think no one will bother and they have free reign to act as they please. Its something that needs to be talked about properly in the public domain.

Such a tough situation for anyone to be in but as you've said in previous posts, it only makes us stronger in the long run! Xx

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Thanks Lee. I'll have a look at that and go down that route first xx

I related my complaint directly to the police code of conduct as well baffled, I think that's a sensible move.

As Lee said, you need to put a complaint in to the police before pursuing legal action.

I sent my complaint to the oic, my MP and the IOPC as I wanted an independent record of it. All the IOPC did was send it on to the relevant Police standards which is dealt with in house. They don't even keep a record or copy of complaints sent to them.

I was genuinely very shocked to discover how open the complaints procedure is to corruption

That's really interesting Lee, my complaint was subject to subjudice so cannot be dealt with until after charges are brought apparently. I've heard nothing from them about it since.

Which means we're obligated to continue dealing with officers who have caused great distress who, of course, now know there's a complaint about them so it has potential to become personal. Crazy system!

All I can say to that Lee, is what an absolute farce!

Well let's just hope we manage to change something for families dealing with this horror in the future!

Xx

Hi

I agree with everything that has been said is this thread but something related to this which is currently in the news is really frustrating me. When a new Justice Minister was announced this week the issue of delays in the criminal justice system was highlighted in the press. We all know about this don't we ladies! My husband's case took almost two years and many people wait even longer! But the press always emphasise the anguish of victims having to wait for so long for the process to get to court. What is never mentioned are the accused, some of whom are not guilty, but have years of stress and emotional turmoil to cope with. Other negative impacts include the loss of employment, the breakdown of family relationships etc.

The way this subject is reported it is as if everyone is guilty. Innocent people (including their families) suffer immense pain due to the delays but this never gets a mention.

Has anyone else noticed this?

Izzy

Gosh the waiting must be hell on Earth. From bein caught and sentencing it was three months of pure agony for us.

my heart goes out to those who wait.....