Approaching a year
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Heya everyone,
We're approaching a year since the world turned upside down.
I'm having mixed feelings about it...
I opened up our mutual best friend about six to eight weeks ago and I've heard nothing since and my husband says to me to wait for her to come to us, Which I agree is wise.
Weve both enrolled on different therapy with different people but recently each found a really amazing seperate therapist for us both. My husband is on a drink reduction program ATM with the very good therapist ... it's difficult and he doesn't always stick to it but he's trying. Personal development has been really good for both of us so I'm thankful for that atleast. I had some real demons hiding away and I think that unearthing them and focusing on me for the past 6/8 months has really helped. It does make me feel insecure about my relationship because I think I've only got space to focus on one person but I keep going on with it.
As horrible as it sounds (for some people), sexually we've entered a new journey in this stage of our relationship and I've never felt more connected and in love and powerful with him and on the same page during it. It's so refreshing. We really open up and talk now about things (on the sexual side).
We have really horrible argumentative days and really nice lovey dovey ones.
I'm still unsure whether to stay or go due to result of the investigation being unknown. Again we've been advised that he would be cautioned but I as a pessimist I don't hold out much hope for that result. But I often think, well someone has to have caution as an outcome if over 750 men are committing this crime surely.... Plus he admitted guilt immediately which I have been advised reduces the sentencing. Given the incredibly small handful of photos he had I'd be very annoyed if he does get more then a caution.
He had only two devices removed for checking and they won't find anything on them because he stored everything in Dropbox.
I'm just rambling really to get my though outta my head.
I keep surviving and there are days when I wanna pack it all in because I think I'm doing myself a disservice by staying with someone who the world deems to be a pedo... I know he's not and I have zero concerns about that given his reasoning. I hate the crime, I hate his stupidity and his depression. However I respect and admire his openess to accept his punishment and improve himself. It takes a really strong person to do that. Those are the days where I confirm to myself that for now I'm glad to be in this relationship and I want to stay.
Keep taking everything day by day people.
(A small joke to finishing - Yes I am nearing my period which brings out all of these emotions doubts and insecurities haha) xx
We're approaching a year since the world turned upside down.
I'm having mixed feelings about it...
I opened up our mutual best friend about six to eight weeks ago and I've heard nothing since and my husband says to me to wait for her to come to us, Which I agree is wise.
Weve both enrolled on different therapy with different people but recently each found a really amazing seperate therapist for us both. My husband is on a drink reduction program ATM with the very good therapist ... it's difficult and he doesn't always stick to it but he's trying. Personal development has been really good for both of us so I'm thankful for that atleast. I had some real demons hiding away and I think that unearthing them and focusing on me for the past 6/8 months has really helped. It does make me feel insecure about my relationship because I think I've only got space to focus on one person but I keep going on with it.
As horrible as it sounds (for some people), sexually we've entered a new journey in this stage of our relationship and I've never felt more connected and in love and powerful with him and on the same page during it. It's so refreshing. We really open up and talk now about things (on the sexual side).
We have really horrible argumentative days and really nice lovey dovey ones.
I'm still unsure whether to stay or go due to result of the investigation being unknown. Again we've been advised that he would be cautioned but I as a pessimist I don't hold out much hope for that result. But I often think, well someone has to have caution as an outcome if over 750 men are committing this crime surely.... Plus he admitted guilt immediately which I have been advised reduces the sentencing. Given the incredibly small handful of photos he had I'd be very annoyed if he does get more then a caution.
He had only two devices removed for checking and they won't find anything on them because he stored everything in Dropbox.
I'm just rambling really to get my though outta my head.
I keep surviving and there are days when I wanna pack it all in because I think I'm doing myself a disservice by staying with someone who the world deems to be a pedo... I know he's not and I have zero concerns about that given his reasoning. I hate the crime, I hate his stupidity and his depression. However I respect and admire his openess to accept his punishment and improve himself. It takes a really strong person to do that. Those are the days where I confirm to myself that for now I'm glad to be in this relationship and I want to stay.
Keep taking everything day by day people.
(A small joke to finishing - Yes I am nearing my period which brings out all of these emotions doubts and insecurities haha) xx
Hi blackhound,
Ahh thats sounds like a good plan, love the last bit, that's how I seem to be reacting when I'm near mine, my poor hubby cops for a load of abuse about how it's all his fault and we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for him, and God love him he takes it xx
Ahh thats sounds like a good plan, love the last bit, that's how I seem to be reacting when I'm near mine, my poor hubby cops for a load of abuse about how it's all his fault and we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for him, and God love him he takes it xx
Thanks Dawn.
I hope things are going okay with yourself?
Having my period coming up isn't an excuse for me really but does it explain things yes! And of course I do try and keep my emotions in check...
Its all a bit of a whirlwind tbh... Did you stay in your current house or did you move during or after the investigation ? I ask because I don't know whether to stay or move house within the next few months...
I hope things are going okay with yourself?
Having my period coming up isn't an excuse for me really but does it explain things yes! And of course I do try and keep my emotions in check...
Its all a bit of a whirlwind tbh... Did you stay in your current house or did you move during or after the investigation ? I ask because I don't know whether to stay or move house within the next few months...
Hi blackhound,
I think because I have had so much shit to deal with, with so more than anything that's why I get so narkie at him but he does take it all, I am getting better as it's not fair on him he is truly sorry for wat he did and he has paid massively as he lost his son over it, but i think that was because we didn't tell him he was going to court and then it was plastered all over social media. Any way I did move house but only because our landlady was trying to screw us over with the rent and I couldn't afford it on my own, but I have had no trouble where I have over too, I'm still in the same town and neither has my hubby, it was literally the weekend it was in the local paper, or more in the online version and then plastered over the local page on fb and as I have said before there was a vigilante group setup so it was on there too, they threatened to go protest outside my hubby flat but they never did xx
I think because I have had so much shit to deal with, with so more than anything that's why I get so narkie at him but he does take it all, I am getting better as it's not fair on him he is truly sorry for wat he did and he has paid massively as he lost his son over it, but i think that was because we didn't tell him he was going to court and then it was plastered all over social media. Any way I did move house but only because our landlady was trying to screw us over with the rent and I couldn't afford it on my own, but I have had no trouble where I have over too, I'm still in the same town and neither has my hubby, it was literally the weekend it was in the local paper, or more in the online version and then plastered over the local page on fb and as I have said before there was a vigilante group setup so it was on there too, they threatened to go protest outside my hubby flat but they never did xx
Heya Dawn,
So sorry you have a vigilante group and the local news surround the case. It's incredibly horrible to think people actively hate on others when they have no clue who they are.
I'm glad you both managed to move though... I'm really thinking of moving but because we own the house, it becomes more difficult..
So sorry you have a vigilante group and the local news surround the case. It's incredibly horrible to think people actively hate on others when they have no clue who they are.
I'm glad you both managed to move though... I'm really thinking of moving but because we own the house, it becomes more difficult..