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Dose it go back to normal

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Colaroo

Member since
October 2020

64 posts

Posted Mon September 27, 2021 9:33pmReport post

It's been 5 months since the police closed my husband case with no further action..... (online chat to minor only sent 18 words before chat ended) Iv stayed with him we have 2 children and he has spent everyday since trying to make it up to me doing the boys bedtime routine cooking the tea taking me out.... but I just can't be my old self anymore im not happy i have more depressed days then happy days now... I love my husband and couldn't see life with out him but I also just find myself sat staring off into space.... how do people move on the ones that have stayed? Dose it every go back to normal?

Becky1234

Member since
March 2021

208 posts

Posted Mon September 27, 2021 11:32pmReport post

Caloroo

Mine is my son so totally different, it's been around 22 months since arrest. I wish I could say it goes back to normal but I honestly don't believe it can. I love my son unconditionally but I am deeply hurt . I believe its a trauma you don't get over but I do believe you can create a new normal maybe even a better normal. I have lots of down days and really wish I could be me again, I believe now I am someone different that questions everything .

I wish you well x

BaffledB

Member since
July 2021

863 posts

Posted Tue September 28, 2021 10:26amReport post

Hi Colaroo,

It's one of the most difficult and torturous experiences I think as a couple you can go through and it is made more difficult because you can't always discuss it with friends and relate to other people. The mind is often not our friend and likes to throw curveballs and thoughts at us which we could do without, I assume your mind sometimes works overtime which leads to unhappy thoughts and feelings. You've been through a very traumatic experience and I imagine you may struggle to trust your partner going forward. You can work to rebuild trust and as for yourself it may be worth speaking to your GP about how you feel to try and access some therapy, if you are worried about speaking to your GP about the real reason you don't have to disclose the ins and outs, you could just say relationship issues.

Try and do things for yourself on a daily basis which you enjoy, find a new hobby or something which helps make you feel good. But most importantly, look after yourself.

Sending hugs xxx