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hi I wonder if anybody can help, I’m looking for courses for my husband, whilst he’s still under investigation, his situation isn’t about downloading images but talking with another adult about abusing a minor, he admits he has a porn addiction which is what lead to this type of conversation and I want to help him, he also wants to get help, we’ve looked at the inform course but it’s just so expensive! Are there any others relating to his situation? Does anybody have any experience of partners attending?
Thanks in advance
jb
Thanks in advance
jb
Hey JB72,
Mine is not ready for a course yet as he’s dealing with a lot of other things alongside this issue but he is doing counselling and that seems to be helping a lot.
How much is the inform course?
How have you been recently? Are you any further toward at all?
ttkit
Mine is not ready for a course yet as he’s dealing with a lot of other things alongside this issue but he is doing counselling and that seems to be helping a lot.
How much is the inform course?
How have you been recently? Are you any further toward at all?
ttkit
My husband attended the course in Scotland. He found it very helpful, as did I! He brought back paperwork that had very useful information which we still have 4 years on. He obviously couldn't go into details as it would breach confidentiality but he said that there was a range of men there from teens to pensioners with all different pending convictions. It really helped him before his court ordered courses.
He managed to get funding for the course, he did have to travel almost 100 miles to it though. It was so helpful the distance was with it.
He managed to get funding for the course, he did have to travel almost 100 miles to it though. It was so helpful the distance was with it.
It’s worth seeing whether there’s a SAA (saauk.info) group near your area. My husband has found these meetings incredibly helpful, as well as the inform course. Also two excellent website resources: yourbrainonporn.com and brainheartworld.org It’s worth starting these things as soon as possible. They really do help break the cycle of porn addiction.
Sorry I have no advice but I would also be very interested about courses or anything you help my husband. He is willing to try anything while he is still under investigation but it's nother for online chat or photos. We got the knock last July and thought it wud of been sorted ages so dint sort courses sooner. Can I ask how did you manageto get funding for the course please xx
My husband is seeing a therapist to work out how he got in this mess. He was offered a CBT course with the NHS but he couldn’t fit in the appointment times with work. His therapist has done a lot of work with sex offenders and will write out a report for court when the time comes, he has already over the course of the last 5 weeks discussed things from his childhood he has never spoken about before so seems to be helping. He is paying privately but with appointments at 8pm he can guarantee he will be able to attend every week. Time is on our side, and whilst he has a job we can afford it. I wonder if it’s enough though, and wether they would want him to do a sex offenders course?
Stardust, we simply asked one of the advisors at Stop it Now if there was funding available. They sorted it all out for us. Sane with our marriage counselling they spoke to Relationshop Scotland on our behalf and they decided they would waive the fees.
It may be worth phoning to ask what funding us available. I'm not sure if we got the help as we went from being high(ish) earners on a full time nurses salary to on basic benefits. Prior to the course my husband also done a lot of one on one with Stop it Now.
It may be worth phoning to ask what funding us available. I'm not sure if we got the help as we went from being high(ish) earners on a full time nurses salary to on basic benefits. Prior to the course my husband also done a lot of one on one with Stop it Now.
Thanks everyone that’s really helpful and we will look into all of them, he’s signed up with an online porn addiction course I found online with the laurel centre, it’s 8 sessions and cost £395 which isn’t as steep as the inform which is over £800, ttkit were no further on but trying to be practical and anything to help his case especially with ss and to prevent him going down this path again can only be a positive thing, the thing is now he can’t live with us and he’s on his own a lot more it’s so much more tempting for him to go back to the porn! Hence the courses! I just want to be doing something practical as until the investigation is over it’s basically out of our hands x
E
the therapist sounds like a good thing especially as they can write a report, can I ask how you found them, was it a gp referral or recommendation or a charity etc?
tia JB
the therapist sounds like a good thing especially as they can write a report, can I ask how you found them, was it a gp referral or recommendation or a charity etc?
tia JB
Hi Jb72
We researched local therapists in our area through RSCPP and found one with the most experience, qualifications and who specializes in this subject. As a psychotherapist he offered a lot more than the NHS were offering. Has your partner phoned MIND? Self referral for treatment, it takes a while being with the NHS but they may offer something different depending on his state of mind. I will look into the online course you mention, I want him to do the Lucy foundation course before all this gets to court but it’s too far away, and costs a lot ontop of what he is already doing.
We researched local therapists in our area through RSCPP and found one with the most experience, qualifications and who specializes in this subject. As a psychotherapist he offered a lot more than the NHS were offering. Has your partner phoned MIND? Self referral for treatment, it takes a while being with the NHS but they may offer something different depending on his state of mind. I will look into the online course you mention, I want him to do the Lucy foundation course before all this gets to court but it’s too far away, and costs a lot ontop of what he is already doing.
Hello,
We can understand that sometimes seeking help can be costly.
There are multiple sources that you could start with to help.
Some of these include free resources such as NHS Moodzone, there is a variety of self-help resources there. Similarly, your partner can visit his GP and may be able to access talking therapies via these means. The GP will also be able to direct you towards local services and wellbeing workshops. In some areas, the NHS has an online resource called IESO, which you may be able to self-refer to.
There is also the opportunity to look for a private counsellor; again, these often come with a fee.
You may like to have a look at The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) as they may be able to signpost you to an appropriate councillor / therapist (https://www.bacp.co.uk/).
In reference to addressing offending behaviour, there are also private councillors that may be able to help.
STOPSO have a UK-wide independent network of suitably qualified and experienced professionals who are willing and trained to work with potential sex offenders, sex offenders and their families. - https://stopso.org.uk/
Another alternative may be to contact Association for the Treatment of Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity (ATSAC) - https://atsac.co.uk/ . ATSAC is a not-for-profit organisation that provides information and support on sex addiction and compulsivity
Additionally, for those living in the North of England Safer Lives work on a 1-1 basis with individuals who are pre/post-conviction for sexual offences with emotional and behavioural support. You can find more information here www.saferlives.com or by emailing jenny@saferlives.com.
There is of course also the option of the Inform Plus course that was mentioned previously. As stated, there is a cost for this ranging between £780 and £1080 depending on whether the group or individualised programme would be most suitable. It is our understanding that Safer Lives are somewhat a similar fee.
We would highly recommend calling the Stop It Now! Helpline, and discussing your concerns regarding this as there are multiple options to help support the exploration of offending behaviour. This may include exploring possible funding streams and alternative avenues.
Similarly, we have a variety of self-help websites, which by design are free to use. One of these is our ‘Get Help’ website at https://get-help.stopitnow.org.uk/ Get Help offers free and anonymous self-help for people who have accessed illegal images of children. Additionally, we have our ‘Get Support’ website which is for individuals who are concerned about their sexual thoughts/feelings about children about children and young people (https://get-support.stopitnow.org.uk/).
Helpline operators are willing to discuss your partner’s insights, reflections, and thinking in relation to these websites. Similarly, they will be able to gauge how to best support your partner further.
Thanks, Lucy.
We can understand that sometimes seeking help can be costly.
There are multiple sources that you could start with to help.
Some of these include free resources such as NHS Moodzone, there is a variety of self-help resources there. Similarly, your partner can visit his GP and may be able to access talking therapies via these means. The GP will also be able to direct you towards local services and wellbeing workshops. In some areas, the NHS has an online resource called IESO, which you may be able to self-refer to.
There is also the opportunity to look for a private counsellor; again, these often come with a fee.
You may like to have a look at The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) as they may be able to signpost you to an appropriate councillor / therapist (https://www.bacp.co.uk/).
In reference to addressing offending behaviour, there are also private councillors that may be able to help.
STOPSO have a UK-wide independent network of suitably qualified and experienced professionals who are willing and trained to work with potential sex offenders, sex offenders and their families. - https://stopso.org.uk/
Another alternative may be to contact Association for the Treatment of Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity (ATSAC) - https://atsac.co.uk/ . ATSAC is a not-for-profit organisation that provides information and support on sex addiction and compulsivity
Additionally, for those living in the North of England Safer Lives work on a 1-1 basis with individuals who are pre/post-conviction for sexual offences with emotional and behavioural support. You can find more information here www.saferlives.com or by emailing jenny@saferlives.com.
There is of course also the option of the Inform Plus course that was mentioned previously. As stated, there is a cost for this ranging between £780 and £1080 depending on whether the group or individualised programme would be most suitable. It is our understanding that Safer Lives are somewhat a similar fee.
We would highly recommend calling the Stop It Now! Helpline, and discussing your concerns regarding this as there are multiple options to help support the exploration of offending behaviour. This may include exploring possible funding streams and alternative avenues.
Similarly, we have a variety of self-help websites, which by design are free to use. One of these is our ‘Get Help’ website at https://get-help.stopitnow.org.uk/ Get Help offers free and anonymous self-help for people who have accessed illegal images of children. Additionally, we have our ‘Get Support’ website which is for individuals who are concerned about their sexual thoughts/feelings about children about children and young people (https://get-support.stopitnow.org.uk/).
Helpline operators are willing to discuss your partner’s insights, reflections, and thinking in relation to these websites. Similarly, they will be able to gauge how to best support your partner further.
Thanks, Lucy.