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Confused and frightened

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Bee4444

Member since
October 2021

7 posts

Posted Mon October 18, 2021 12:23pmReport post

Hi

my partner was arrested on suspicion of child grooming. I am trying to cope but I'm not doing so well. I just wanted to reach out so I'm not alone as I feel like I've lost everything. I don't know how to feel about any of it - or him. I think I'm trying to deny it all. I can't eat. I can't sleep. Ive read many of your posts and I know that So many of you get through this, but right now i feel like I can't get through each day.

ive been terrified of posting on a public forum but I need to reach out.

I don't know what I'm looking for here really, just not to be alone.



Bee x

LemonDrizzleCake

Member since
April 2021

20 posts

Posted Tue October 19, 2021 5:28pmReport post

I'm so sorry that you find yourself here, where none of us want to be :(

You say you're not eating or sleeping at the moment so I'm guessing that it's very early days for you? It took me a few weeks to stop shaking and to eat anything decent at all. I had to take a month off work. I'm 7 months in now, and it does get easier. It's still hanging over me every day of course, but generally it does get easier.

Please take time to look after yourself, it's important in those early days to just concentrate on getting yourself through each day. Try to do something simple but nice for yourself each day if you can. A bubble bath, a quiet walk, or a film on netflix. Reach out to a trusted friend or family member for support.

This forum has also been a huge help for me. I don't post much, but just to read through others posts helps me to not feel quite so alone.

Take care x

Judith

Member since
June 2021

195 posts

Posted Tue October 19, 2021 9:07pmReport post

Hi Bee

We can all identify with what you describe. These types of offences have such stigma attached to them that it is difficult for families to access the right kind of support. Please remember you are not to blame for this. I find it helpful to look through forum posts as others have been through this before us and their experiences are so valuable. You can also access the helpline.

Yes, make sure you look to what you may need as part of your recovery. It is likely to be a long haul and there will be many ups and downs.

Kind regards

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2547 posts

Posted Wed October 20, 2021 1:56amReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Wed October 20, 2021 5:09am

Bee4444

Member since
October 2021

7 posts

Posted Wed October 20, 2021 9:26amReport post

Thank you for your support and messages. It's still less than two weeks and I'm trying to take one day at a time but I sometimes feel like I'm drowning - other times I'm in total denial. I've been reading a lot on the forum and the strength of you ladies is about the only thing I have that helps right now.
x

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2547 posts

Posted Wed October 20, 2021 9:40amReport post

Hi confused x

Yes as said - the beginning of this journey is really hard and painful. The bombs just seem to continue to drop with no break, one after the other.

Take each day as it comes, much easier said than done, but 'try' not to panic about things that haven't happened yet or take on the bigger picture.

You have moments and down times - but it does get easier and life takes on a new normal.

Keep strong x