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How long for the computer

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Bethlou23

Member since
December 2018

383 posts

Posted Sun March 10, 2019 11:53pmReport post

I know not legal but more criminal investigation.

the police keep saythe sane thing 4 weeks every time I call them. They were supposed to be fast tracking through but it seems so slow.



i know I really wouldn’t wish that job on anyone searching for these images.

Out of curiosity how long did they take in your cases to examine the devices?

Madeleine

Member since
November 2018

42 posts

Posted Sun March 10, 2019 11:56pmReport post

Eight months.

Maria

Member since
September 2018

286 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 6:45amReport post

Ours took around 8 weeks to be done. I think ours were done quickly as they had the evidence they needed and were not expecting anything else, there were no images or anything like that. It look six months to get some of it back and we are still waiting for the rest of it which they kept until after the court case.

Bethlou23

Member since
December 2018

383 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 10:16amReport post

8 months! Literally how do you cope with that level of anxiety. I am just annoyed as they keep saying soon but then 4 weeks come and then another 4 weeks and they are half way through . 8 weeks is still a long time boy that sounds more reasonable.

i don’t mind about getting the computer back, I don’t want to see a computer anytime soon and I was lucky that I have most of my family photos but I did loose my c.v and would have liked that rather than to start again!!!



i just want to move on with my life.

Trying to keep it together

Member since
February 2019

111 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 10:29amReport post

Hubby’s work items were done in 10 weeks but these were done by his investigating officers as not expecting anything on there.

Main laptop, mobile and iPad are still with them and no timescale has been given for those.

his investigating officer said to him previously that he she has cases lasting as long as 6 months on the go at the time.

Betty

Member since
February 2019

38 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 2:06pmReport post

The police said 6 months for my son's to be looked at. I'm just trying to live normally for the time being but it's hard.

KLK

Member since
October 2018

99 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 2:06pmReport post

I was told last week that we will be looking at about a year from the knock even though they have everything back they need to now look through it all, re-interview, CPS and then court. The wait is an absolute killer and really isn't fair to live life in limbo for so long

Trying to keep it together

Member since
February 2019

111 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 2:49pmReport post

So we’ve just had the call from IO to say that his phone and laptop have been checked and nothing else on them that they didn’t know about.

ipad still to be done.

Genuinely feel a massive sense of relief that nothing extra has come back from those 2 devices. I had wondered if he was being honest with me as I know from on here that sometimes offenders try to shield you from extra bits but at least I know my faith in him hasn’t been misplaced.

4 devices down 1 to go and then onto the next stage

Bethlou23

Member since
December 2018

383 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 3:39pmReport post

Thanks trying to keep it together,

the wait is making me so anxious. How is your husband coping. Mine seems so lost and confused. Everything is a limbo. He isn’t as suicidal as before and is now looking forward but I don’t think he is yet in the head space for therapy. He is slowly getting there and is accepting that while o am in his life I don’t want a sexual relationship with him at the present time.

I have spoken to the gp about my anxiety but this wait is horrendous. I know he will get charged and I just want it over with.

i have read about porn addiction and trauma and I just feel sorry for everyone who is having to navigate through this.

Bethlou23

Member since
December 2018

383 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 3:46pmReport post

Hi just read your second message. Yes it’s so good he is being honest. From what I have read denial about the situation seems quite common at first.

all the best everyone experiencing this. Like I said before what a horrible job going through computers for these images. They are wholly inappropriate and wrong.

for family and friends this limbo and trauma is very difficult to manage as well as trying to understand what led to the offending in the first place. For me my husband is still a gentle caring man with a lot of emotional baggage. Having your private internet searches made public is hard for us all. I don’t ever condone people who take indecent images of children.

Bethlou23

Member since
December 2018

383 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 3:49pmReport post

Betty

i am trying to live normally too but somedays are so hard. I am greatful I am not alone going through this ( wish none of us were though what a horrible club to be in)

Trying to keep it together

Member since
February 2019

111 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 6:20pmReport post

Hey bethlou.

Husband is cooing a lot better now, he’s having counselling is identifying what made him have this one off awful conversation.

For me I think it’s been really important for him to be able to find his own way with this rather than me try push him through things and it seems to have worked as he’s getting more comfortable talking about everything. I’m sure we aren’t out of the woods yet but we have plans for most eventualities and I think that’s also helping him.

Whilst I struggled with what he did initially I actually have come to terms with it I think as I don’t get angry or emotional about it anymore. Where I am at now is about making the best of what we have and what we could have even though that looks very very different to what we could of had. I also think we understand more about what happened in his life when he was a child and reading a lot of information has helped me understand that what he did was wrong but he’s also wired wrong mentally To even get into the conversation he did.

ttkit

Bethlou23

Member since
December 2018

383 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 6:46pmReport post

I know what you mean about being wired differently but it’s good he is trying really hard to make sense of it.

Going to a counsellor is a big start and the fact it’s led by himself is encouraging. He obviously doesn’t want to loose you. And in a way it’s a privilege he choose to open up to you! ( I know after the blooming police turn up)

i amGood luck with it, hope the investigative officer is Helpful. I am holding off pestering mine for another week. It’s got to be good that when all the equipment comes back he has started to get help for his offending. I hope so anyway.

Tracey

Member since
December 2018

450 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 8:49pmReport post

Hi Bethlou23

We got the knock last April, we were initially told 4 to 6 weeks but it went on until end of July before he was interviewed, then it went to the CPS to make a decision.

In crown court at the end of November and sentencing in a couple of weeks.

Still not got the electrical things back but when I spoke to the police they said they can't give them back until the judge says they can just in case they are needed or more information need to be looked for

It's awful just waiting with not knowing and uncertainty but you will get through it because your have no choice I'm afraid but the frustration and emotion involved is terrible

Hope you're feeling a little better this week, remember you're doing so well and are stronger than your think

Lots of love xx

Bethlou23

Member since
December 2018

383 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 9:04pmReport post

Thanks tracey,

what a journey we are all on. I am having good days and bad days. It’s becoming more real as time goes on, I am particularly lost of an evening once my daughter goes to bed. I am trying to embrace my new life and some days I cope better than others. I don’t think the reality has really hit me yet. I just can’t make sense of how the gentle kind man I married had such dark thoughts . Even if it’s a sex addiction my brain just can’t stomach it and sometimes I catch myself thinking it’s not that bad. But then I also think it must be for the police to spend so many resources and man power carrying out these raids.

I am okay though, I like when you say we will get through it! Because we have too.

How you feeling too?

Madeleine

Member since
November 2018

42 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 9:14pmReport post

Yes the wait is a real killer, especially as we were told about 6 weeks originally. Life is just on hold but it has given me time to think and process things which probably needed to happen.

Bethlou23

Member since
December 2018

383 posts

Posted Mon March 11, 2019 9:26pmReport post

Thanks madeleine

its the constant four to six weeks every phone call. They only have one item to go through now. I am trying to be pragmatic about the time but really struggling. At lease he has told me there images to be found.

Big sigh

Member since
December 2018

244 posts

Posted Wed March 13, 2019 9:45pmReport post

Bethlou - do you actually get to speak to someone at the police? The police haven’t answered a single call since his arrest. The only thing I know is when a police rep cane to the CP conference tho they just sent someone along, not the investigating officer. This limbo is starting to really get me down

SallyBlue

Member since
March 2019

252 posts

Posted Wed March 13, 2019 10:13pmReport post

My laptop and tablet was checked during the warranted search within an hour. My phone was away for a month (Stop it Now helped me get it back as I was not under investigation), my husbands phone, where the images were stored was destroyed after trial. He never hit it back.