Let go from his job and I’m so angry at him.
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Sorry to vent again but I knew this day would come i thought I'd prepared myself mentally for it. A year after the knock (he's not been charged or we haven't had any devices back) after being suspended from work without pay they finally let him go.
Im full of anger towards him and the situation I'm in I've been paying all the bills and mortgage on our family home as he said he couldn't help as had to pay rent and bills on where he's living now. Since he's lost his job it's hit home that I've got to keep working as all the responsibilities fall on me it's left to me to keep the roof over mine and my children's head. I didn't even want this bloody house and was talked into it by him and mainly his family how renting was a waste of money (I'd lived alone renting for 10 years with my daughter until he moved in with us) we've only bought this house 2 years ago so at 45 years old I'm left with it for what feels like forever.
we also worked together and I seem to miss him more at work as I miss seeing his smile and him helping me without judging when I had a problem with the computers side of the job (since he left I've managed to avoid using them which either means that part of the job was not important or nobody checks up on my work). He was still on the rotas too but I'm dreading the questions when hes finally removed from them.
What do u do when people ask questions? I've thought of two ways to tell them 1 is in the nicest way possible way tell them I don't know anything and they should ask management or the 2nd is to look at them like they are speaking a different language and just walk off.
I wish it was all over with I want the questions that friends and colleagues are going to ask done with. I want the judging over with. I've moved on best I can for now. One of my friends keep telling me I'll be ok and people will be on my side and will not judge or be funny with me but I know it won't be like that. Any worries I air with her she just seems to play down as I will all be ok for you and it's him that will suffer.
sorry for the long rant x
Im full of anger towards him and the situation I'm in I've been paying all the bills and mortgage on our family home as he said he couldn't help as had to pay rent and bills on where he's living now. Since he's lost his job it's hit home that I've got to keep working as all the responsibilities fall on me it's left to me to keep the roof over mine and my children's head. I didn't even want this bloody house and was talked into it by him and mainly his family how renting was a waste of money (I'd lived alone renting for 10 years with my daughter until he moved in with us) we've only bought this house 2 years ago so at 45 years old I'm left with it for what feels like forever.
we also worked together and I seem to miss him more at work as I miss seeing his smile and him helping me without judging when I had a problem with the computers side of the job (since he left I've managed to avoid using them which either means that part of the job was not important or nobody checks up on my work). He was still on the rotas too but I'm dreading the questions when hes finally removed from them.
What do u do when people ask questions? I've thought of two ways to tell them 1 is in the nicest way possible way tell them I don't know anything and they should ask management or the 2nd is to look at them like they are speaking a different language and just walk off.
I wish it was all over with I want the questions that friends and colleagues are going to ask done with. I want the judging over with. I've moved on best I can for now. One of my friends keep telling me I'll be ok and people will be on my side and will not judge or be funny with me but I know it won't be like that. Any worries I air with her she just seems to play down as I will all be ok for you and it's him that will suffer.
sorry for the long rant x
I'm so sorry Rusty. It's so hard being left in that financial position. So much of this removes our control and ability to choose what we do with our lives because of the change in responsibilities. Its such a long lasting impact.
With your friends response I get that it's hard to hear 'it'll be okay' because there are so many things that feel not okay. I guess though that friends when they say that mean 'i care about you and I want you to be okay'. If I'm ranting or upset my closest friend always asks 'what do you need?' and I find that a really kind response. She gets that she can't fix it or make things okay but if there is anything I can do in the immediate situation she's supportive.
Must be really hard for you having worked together with mutual colleagues. As for answering people's questions I would opt for, 'I'm sure you understand how difficult this year has been and I'd really rather not talk about it. Thank you'
With your friends response I get that it's hard to hear 'it'll be okay' because there are so many things that feel not okay. I guess though that friends when they say that mean 'i care about you and I want you to be okay'. If I'm ranting or upset my closest friend always asks 'what do you need?' and I find that a really kind response. She gets that she can't fix it or make things okay but if there is anything I can do in the immediate situation she's supportive.
Must be really hard for you having worked together with mutual colleagues. As for answering people's questions I would opt for, 'I'm sure you understand how difficult this year has been and I'd really rather not talk about it. Thank you'
I agree with cloud that you don't owe your colleagues an explanation. They should respect your privacy. Same thing happened to my partner. He was suspended but they had to let him go and this way before charges were set.
And I can sympathize with the whole family pressure to get a property Vs renting. I'm also struggling to see why we should get a property. My partner is two years post sentence but I always worry about what if I'm left with the mortgage. Hopefully your partner can get a job in the meantime whilst under investigation. Tho I would recommend he try to find a job that offers some sort flexibility or relative short notice time off.
Big hugs
And I can sympathize with the whole family pressure to get a property Vs renting. I'm also struggling to see why we should get a property. My partner is two years post sentence but I always worry about what if I'm left with the mortgage. Hopefully your partner can get a job in the meantime whilst under investigation. Tho I would recommend he try to find a job that offers some sort flexibility or relative short notice time off.
Big hugs
Thank you cloud that's a really better response and my manager has told me if I get any hassle to let her know and she will drag them in the office and warn them. My male boss is useless though and told a colleague he wouldn't do anything as he thinks it would quieten down quicker nor does he want to add fuel to the fire.
thank you majestictopaz I hope he can find work to keep himself busy plus pay something towards the children.
stay safe x
thank you majestictopaz I hope he can find work to keep himself busy plus pay something towards the children.
stay safe x